Venting Gay Community is a nightmare

[nobody11]

I'm gay. All the dating apps have no hope for marriage. They talk about AIDS testing, disease-free status, and sex positions!
I just want somone for life not for 2 months fun!

 

[casual_existence]

Dating apps are worthless for finding a partner. A gotta do it in an organic manner online or offline. Which is hard lol.

 

[nobody11]

Dating apps are worthless for finding a partner. A gotta do it in an organic manner online or offline. Which is hard lol.

I am AIDS free!

 

[permanently tired]

I once wanted a relationship. There's nothing left for me and no relationship could fix me so I'm just looking be gone now

 

[Linda]

I have known a lot of gay men over a period of 50 years. The impression I get is that almost all long-term gay relationships started with a one night thing. Nine times out of ten that one night leads nowhere. But sometimes it leads to a lasting relationship. (It's not all that different from heterosexuals really, except, perhaps, that gay men are more inclined to have sex on a first date.) Just get out there and meet people, by any means that is convenient, and take it from there. If there are any gay bars in your area, they might be better places to meet people than online.

 

[Suwa]

i get what you mean completely. i believe its only about the sex for most queers. its terrible. what ever happened to a long and meaningful relationship? ive gotten myself into online relationships organically with a few queer people, but no matter how meaningful it seems at the start, it always devolves into the other person talking to me about sex- and nothing else. i hate it so much. i wish i could just be normal

 

[EvisceratedJester]

i get what you mean completely. i believe its only about the sex for most queers. its terrible. what ever happened to a long and meaningful relationship? ive gotten myself into online relationships organically with a few queer people, but no matter how meaningful it seems at the start, it always devolves into the other person talking to me about sex- and nothing else. i hate it so much. i wish i could just be normal

To be fair, it's only about sex for most relationships in general, including straight relationships. My mom cheated on my dad sexually, my dad cheated on my mom (supposedly. I'm not sure if I 100% believe her or not), my ex-stepmother cheated on my dad sexually, and my grandfather cheated on my grandmother sexually. That dude who claims to be in love with me (and I've developed feelings for him) and, at one point would ask me to be his girlfriend over and over again, would also make all sorts of comments about how just seeing my face alone was enough to make aroused him and he used to get horny during our conversations (it's died down now though).

I've seen striaght people with low libidos complaining about how hard it is for them when it comes to finding a relationship because of how, for a lot of people, relationships revolve around sex.

For most people, relationships revolve around sex, so much so to the point at which the idea of a romantic relationship with little to no sex is extremely weird to most people. This has nothing to do with queerness, especially since asexuals are queer and they don't really tend to obssess over sex (for obvious reasons). This has more to do with our society putting too much emphasis on sex when it comes to relationships.

 

[UKscotty]

Get off things like Grindr, people there are only looking for sex.

Dating apps in general, straight or gay are not very good, it's best to get out there and meet people in the real world.

 

[wait.what]

Specialty dating apps can have some value for people who have unusual non-negotiables … like if you ONLY want to date Orthodox Jews or polyamorous people or people willing to relocate to your very remote farm.

I met my S.O. on a (now closed) messageboard that had a "trans 4 trans" section. That was about 6 years ago, and I'm still with him. Your mileage may vary, obviously, but that particular strategy worked for me.

 

[BlessedBeTheFlame]

i get what you mean completely. i believe its only about the sex for most queers. its terrible. what ever happened to a long and meaningful relationship?

You're confusing queers with bisexuals. Bi "people" like me are all like that. It's why literally everyone in actual queer circles hates our guts and wants us nowhere. Allowing the B into LGT was one of the worst mistakes, since we now are the majority and ruin everyones credibility with our worthless existence. I'm sorry. I'm genuinely so fucking sorry for not killing myself sooner. I mean it. I'm sorry.

 

[nobody11]

You're confusing queers with bisexuals. Bi "people" like me are all like that. It's why literally everyone in actual queer circles hates our guts and wants us nowhere. Allowing the B into LGT was one of the worst mistakes, since we now are the majority and ruin everyones credibility with our worthless existence. I'm sorry. I'm genuinely so fucking sorry for not killing myself sooner. I mean it. I'm sorry.

"Allowing the B into LGT was one of the worst mistakes"
Agree10000000X

 

[BlessedBeTheFlame]

Agree10000000X

I'm so sorry. I promise I will kill myself. Thank you for finally being one of the few people to honestly tell me how disgusting I am. I tried to get this exact opinion out of people for years, but everyone was too afraid to finally say it. Thank you. I promise I will not allow a worthless subhuman as myself to further pollute everyone elses world. I promise I will kill myself. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for being too cowardly to finally do something right for once. I'm so sorry. I promise I will do it finally. I promise I will no longer be such worthless scum. I'm sorry.

 

[sammiechzxv]

True for any dating app. Unfortunately, the easy way is usually not the best way.

 

[Tionally]

"Allowing the B into LGT was one of the worst mistakes"
Agree10000000X

what's wrong with bi people...? they still like the same gender so they're not the norm...? what's wrong with them being in the LGBT wtf

 

[Grav]

Allowing the B into LGT was one of the worst mistakes

I'm curious about this also. Is it because bi people would be driven only by sex thereby pulling the LGT group as whole to be more sex oriented vs relationships? I agree with others that almost all relationships have sex as a factor, usually 50%+, so making social circles more sex hookup dominant would be a problem for those looking for more.

 

[Thia]

I'm so sorry. I promise I will kill myself. Thank you for finally being one of the few people to honestly tell me how disgusting I am. I tried to get this exact opinion out of people for years, but everyone was too afraid to finally say it. Thank you. I promise I will not allow a worthless subhuman as myself to further pollute everyone elses world. I promise I will kill myself. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for being too cowardly to finally do something right for once. I'm so sorry. I promise I will do it finally. I promise I will no longer be such worthless scum. I'm sorry.

I honestly believe that being bi is not disgusting at all. At least, no more disgusting than being straight or gay or lesbian. If you aren't asexual, everyone experiences sexual feelings to some extent--there is no innate reason why liking both (or multiple) genders is any more disgusting than liking one.

Is this the reason why you are here...? I really feel sorry

 

[hermestrimegistus]

Its the same with the straight community. Most people gay or straight seem to only want to use other people as quick mindless cum receptacles. And thats fine if that's what some people are into. But it is very obviously the norm now. It's too much effort and work for the average human to try to actually foster a relationship. Even just a friendship. Why try to create a lasting foundation when you can just open an app and find somebody to suck your cock and then immediately leave? It's instant gratification. Way more convenient than having to actually get to know someone. Idk. We're all fucked

 

[Abyssal]

This reads like an alt my homophobic uncle would make lmao. Jokes aside that isn't the gay community, just the dating app community. Go to a pride meet or something, hell even tumblr is a better representation of us and I can't stand tumblr.

 

[RosebyAnyName]

Thought I'd revive this post because I was about to make a post about this exact topic (I'm a lesbian). Agreed, gay community (and extended LGBT community) is a nightmare.

I remember hearing from a gay man (friend of a friend) that he didn't connect with the local gay community because "the men were only interested in sex." The fact that others feel the same indicates to me that the market for less-sexual spaces is out there, it just hasn't really been implemented or culturally integrated. I need to take medication which makes my sex drive non-existent, and I have a lot of trauma surrounding sex, so from my perspective the expectation of casual sex just feels like a barrier rather than an opportunity to connect. I've wondered if I'm asexual, or if the vocal portion of the LGBT is just hypersexual to the point that the average gay person can't relate.

As for the discussion about bisexuality... it's interesting that bi people feel guilt from "taking up a lot of representation", presumably just from being highly represented in the LGBT by numbers alone. It reminds me of how, on the opposite spectrum, a lot of lesbians (myself included) want to remove themselves from the LGBT because they feel under-represented and like their voices aren't being heard. Concerns include unchecked misogyny within the community, and the pressure for lesbians to be hyper sexual because they are "in demand" yet low in quantity. There's a weird sense of entitlement within the LGBT community surrounding the idea that someone can " 'transition' a lesbian into being male-attracted" and similar rhetoric, or that lesbians "should" be attracted to certain groups of people or else they're being "mean" for "withholding sex".
Honestly, at this point I feel like lumping in every non-straight and/or non-cis person under one umbrella and expecting them to all get along and represent each other was a mistake. It made sense in a historical context, but it really doesn't make sense now.

 

[BlessedBeTheFlame]

As for the discussion about bisexuality... it's interesting that bi people feel guilt from "taking up a lot of representation", presumably just from being highly represented in the LGBT by numbers alone. It reminds me of how, on the opposite spectrum, a lot of lesbians (myself included) want to remove themselves from the LGBT because they feel under-represented and like their voices aren't being heard. Concerns include unchecked misogyny within the community, and the pressure for lesbians to be hyper sexual because they are "in demand" yet low in quantity. There's a weird sense of entitlement within the LGBT community surrounding the idea that someone can " 'transition' a lesbian into being male-attracted" and similar rhetoric, or that lesbians "should" be attracted to certain groups of people or else they're being "mean" for "withholding sex".
Honestly, at this point I feel like lumping in every non-straight and/or non-cis person under one umbrella and expecting them to all get along and represent each other was a mistake. It made sense in a historical context, but it really doesn't make sense now.

The reason people hate subhumans like me is because we deserve to be hated. The reason people say these things to you is because us bi "people" are subhumans and responsible for making you look this way by mere association. It's so obvious, when you finally see it. It's because all of us are nothing but worthless hypersexual degenerates, who make anyone slightly similar-looking look terrible. Taking up representation is also reprehensible, since we don't deserve to be represented, except as disgusting subhumans. We deserve to only be seen on the same level as murderers and rapists. All of us should just outright die at this point.
I agree with the last point. It would be best if everyone like me would die frankly. But since humanity isn't ready to accept the truth, I guess it'd be best for all of us subhumans to be banished somewhere far away, away from anyone we could hurt. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for being alive. I'm sorry.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

The reason people hate subhumans like me is because we deserve to be hated. The reason people say these things to you is because us bi "people" are subhumans and responsible for making you look this way by mere association. It's so obvious, when you finally see it. It's because all of us are nothing but worthless hypersexual degenerates, who make anyone slightly similar-looking look terrible. Taking up representation is also reprehensible, since we don't deserve to be represented, except as disgusting subhumans. We deserve to only be seen on the same level as murderers and rapists. All of us should just outright die at this point.
I agree with the last point. It would be best if everyone like me would die frankly. But since humanity isn't ready to accept the truth, I guess it'd be best for all of us subhumans to be banished somewhere far away, away from anyone we could hurt. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for being alive. I'm sorry.

Dude, most bi people aren't hypersexual. Hypersexuality has more to do with things, like past trauma or just your own brain chemistry, not sexual orientation. I've only met one hypersexual bi person before and they were about as horny as a good amount of the straight men I've sexted. The whole entire "bi = sexual deviant" shit is rhetoric used by bigoted assholes as an excuse to discriminate against bi people. This doesn't even just apply to them. It applies to most marginalized groups, including gay people, trans people, black women, latino women, black men, indigenous women, etc.

Also, saying that bi people should be seen on the same level as rapists is incredibly offensive since bi women are disproportionally more likely to be victims of SA in comparison to both straight women and lesbians. I understand that a lot of what you are saying stems from internalized biphobia but still that's going too far. If you are going to hate yourself to this degree then at least keep all that hatred directed towards yourself, don't project it on to others apart of your demographic.

Being a worthless hypersexual degenerate has nothing to do with bisexuality. I've met more "monosexual" people were worthless hypersexual degenerates than I've bi people who were worthless hypersexual degenerates.

Along with that, most of the hypersexual degenerates that I have met, bi or not, were usually some of nicest and most chill folks around. Freaky people usually tend to be very friendly and progressive, so even if all bi people were hypersexual degenerates I wouldn't say that's something to look down on them for. Those hypersexual degenerates were the ones who stood by the queer community and fought for their rights. Hence why kink is apart of pride.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Open your fucking eyes just one time. Every fucking time I find some deviant or degenerate I stalk their socials and 100% of the time they turn out to be bisexuals. Do the same thing with bitches on Onlyfans or pornstars or camgirls. You'll be real surprised how fast you start agreeing with me. "Oh, but some dumb fucking site told me something else". Yeah, I thought that too until I started looking through this shit myself.


I don't give a shit.

Cope.

No, they are vile subhumans and deserve death. Stop fucking coping. Freaky people tend to be subhumans. Stop coping about how murdering some girl is a fetish. And you're not addressing anything about the fact no one wants these bi subhumans anywhere near them. Almost like there's a good reason to hate them.

I have doubts that 100% of time the person you've stalked turned out to be bisexual. Even of that were the case that wouldn't mean anything because you'd only be looking at those who've done things like that. Any bi person who isn't a "degenerate" wouldn't be on your radar. When I find sexual deviants online 9/10 they are straight. Does that mean mean that all straight people are sexual degenerates now? Notice how stupid that logic is?

Also, imagine not giving a shit about claiming that a demographic that is more at risk of being SA'd is on the same level as rapists. The only person acting like a "vile subhuman" here is you. You are the problem. You are putting down an entire community of people down and are making offensive comparisons between them and murderers and rapists because rather than realizing that your hatred is reflection of yourself and your issues you instead decide to go ahead and project it on to others.

I'm sorry if I come off as rude while saying this but it is the truth. If you are going to be a hateful motherfucker then keep that hatred to yourself. Enough bi people have already been discriminated against by their own community and by society as a whole. Nobody wants wants to hear you make such cruel and disgusting statements regarding them. Just because you think of yourself as some vile digusting subhuman doesn't mean that all bi people are disgusting vile subhumans.

 

[kermudgeon]

Dude, most bi people aren't hypersexual. Hypersexuality has more to do with things, like past trauma or just your own brain chemistry, not sexual orientation. I've only met one hypersexual bi person before and they were about as horny as a good amount of the straight men I've sexted. The whole entire "bi = sexual deviant" shit is rhetoric used by bigoted assholes as an excuse to discriminate against bi people. This doesn't even just apply to them. It applies to most marginalized groups, including gay people, trans people, black women, latino women, black men, indigenous women, etc.

Also, saying that bi people should be seen on the same level as rapists is incredibly offensive since bi women are disproportionally more likely to be victims of SA in comparison to both straight women and lesbians. I understand that a lot of what you are saying stems from internalized biphobia but still that's going too far. If you are going to hate yourself to this degree then at least keep all that hatred directed towards yourself, don't project it on to others apart of your demographic.

Being a worthless hypersexual degenerate has nothing to do with bisexuality. I've met more "monosexual" people were worthless hypersexual degenerates than I've bi people who were worthless hypersexual degenerates.

Along with that, most of the hypersexual degenerates that I have met, bi or not, were usually some of nicest and most chill folks around. Freaky people usually tend to be very friendly and progressive, so even if all bi people were hypersexual degenerates I wouldn't say that's something to look down on them for. Those hypersexual degenerates were the ones who stood by the queer community and fought for their rights. Hence why kink is apart of pride.

Yes, fucking thank you! Jfc this thread...

 

[BlessedBeTheFlame]

I have doubts that 100% of time the person you've stalked turned out to be bisexual. Even of that were the case that wouldn't mean anything because you'd only be looking at those who've done things like that. Any bi person who isn't a "degenerate" wouldn't be on your radar. When I find sexual deviants online 9/10 they are straight. Does that mean mean that all straight people are sexual degenerates now? Notice how stupid that logic is?

"I literally have seen this exact thing happen." "Nuh uh, you didn't." How about you fucking try it once, since you're so fucking sure. I can guarantee you, it's ALWAYS FUCKING LIKE THAT EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME! Go through the biggest names on Pornhub and look what they have as their preferences. Really fucking enlightening that one. That's how I became this way. When I noticed how impossible any other possibility is, I started hating myself for it. "W-well, even if what you said is true, I-I don't care." Shut the fuck up one time.

Also, imagine not giving a shit about claiming that a demographic that is more at risk of being SA'd is on the same level as rapists. The only person acting like a "vile subhuman" here is you. You are the problem. You are putting down an entire community of people down and are making offensive comparisons between them and murderers and rapists because rather than realizing that your hatred is reflection of yourself and your issues you instead decide to go ahead and project it on to others.

I PUT THEM DOWN BECAUSE I UNDERSTAND THE FUCKING TRUTH YOU FUCKING TROGLODYTE1 "Oh, you hate nazis and are putting them all down. Hmmm, how offensive." WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THEN; HUUH? JUST SHUT MY EYES AND PRETEND NOTHING I SEE IS REAL?

I'm sorry if I come off as rude while saying this but it is the truth. If you are going to be a hateful motherfucker then keep that hatred to yourself. Enough bi people have already been discriminated against by their own community and by society as a whole. Nobody wants wants to hear you make such cruel and disgusting statements regarding them. Just because you think of yourself as some vile digusting subhuman doesn't mean that all bi people are disgusting vile subhumans.

Not enough bi people have been discriminated against. Look up Washington D.C. hate crime stats. Anti-bisexual crime is more rare than anti-straight crime. If bi "people" are discriminated against, then so are straight people. You want the truth? They should be discriminated against more. They should all be shot. And again, you're not responding to the fact no LGTQ-people want us subhumans anywhere.

 

[thirdrailer]

The reason people hate subhumans like me is because we deserve to be hated. The reason people say these things to you is because us bi "people" are subhumans and responsible for making you look this way by mere association. It's so obvious, when you finally see it. It's because all of us are nothing but worthless hypersexual degenerates, who make anyone slightly similar-looking look terrible. Taking up representation is also reprehensible, since we don't deserve to be represented, except as disgusting subhumans. We deserve to only be seen on the same level as murderers and rapists. All of us should just outright die at this point.
I agree with the last point. It would be best if everyone like me would die frankly. But since humanity isn't ready to accept the truth, I guess it'd be best for all of us subhumans to be banished somewhere far away, away from anyone we could hurt. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for being alive. I'm sorry.

They should all be shot. And again, you're not responding to the fact no LGTQ-people want us subhumans anywhere.

You're obviously in a ton of pain. I hope you find peace whatever, that looks like for you.

I describe myself as pan rather than bi, but I think that's a distinction without a difference these days. I'm not going to try and convince you that I'm not a subhuman, worthless, hypersexual degenerate. I'm not going to try and convince you that I should not be shot. I will say in speaking with my friends about my suicidal ideation, including cis and trans lesbians who are very much not bisexual and very much LGTQ-people as you call them, I was told they'd miss me and would not get over my death as easily as I think they would. They want me anywhere, namely in their lives.

Could I be lying by saying people want me around? Of course, that is exactly what a subhuman degenerate would do, right? Could I be telling the truth? That is also what a decent human being, one who is admittedly flawed and struggling but is not a subhuman degenerate would do.

If you feel you deserve to be shot, I feel for you. If you feel I deserve to be shot, well, I don't feel for you there.

 

[Lookingtoflyfree]

Allowing the B into LGT was one of the worst mistakes

Toxic as FUCK. Seriously you are not welcomed with this drivel.

 

[Tionally]

Open your fucking eyes just one time. Every fucking time I find some deviant or degenerate I stalk their socials and 100% of the time they turn out to be bisexuals. Do the same thing with bitches on Onlyfans or pornstars or camgirls. You'll be real surprised how fast you start agreeing with me. "Oh, but some dumb fucking site told me something else". Yeah, I thought that too until I started looking through this shit myself.


I don't give a shit.

Cope.

No, they are vile subhumans and deserve death. Stop fucking coping. Freaky people tend to be subhumans. Stop coping about how murdering some girl is a fetish. And you're not addressing anything about the fact no one wants these bi subhumans anywhere near them. Almost like there's a good reason to hate them.

i know you hate yourself and this comes from self-loathing but ... this just doesn't make any sense.
even if bi people were extremely horny and hypersexual and only wanted to fuck (which I don't believe is the case and that's also absurd)
then why would they be vile and deserve death?? why would they be worse than rapist and murders??
hating on hypersexual people doesn't really make sense if they're not hurting anyone and doing it with consent.
and being bi just means liking your gender and the opposite. no hypersexuality required so it doesn't make sense even more

I hope you can find some happiness and stop hating yourself but hating on people of the same sexuality as you just because you hate yourself isn't reasonable at all

 

[BlessedBeTheFlame]

Toxic as FUCK. Seriously you are not welcomed with this drivel.

OP literally agreed with me immediatly. Cope. It's clear actual LGTQ-people want me nowhere.

i know you hate yourself and this comes from self-loathing but ... this just doesn't make any sense.
even if bi people were extremely horny and hypersexual and only wanted to fuck (which I don't believe is the case and that's also absurd)
then why would they be vile and deserve death?? why would they be worse than rapist and murders??
hating on hypersexual people doesn't really make sense if they're not hurting anyone and doing it with consent.
and being bi just means liking your gender and the opposite. no hypersexuality required so it doesn't make sense even more

I hope you can find some happiness and stop hating yourself but hating on people of the same sexuality as you just because you hate yourself isn't reasonable at all

People on here constantly talk about how everyone is out only for sex and how disgusting it is, but as soon as someone finds out it applies to some special group, all of a sudden that's actually the coolest thing possible. "I hope you can pretend all of the things you saw aren't real, so you can live a meaningless life as someone nobody likes." Fuck off, we're on a suicide forum. You're supposed to nod along and say "Yes, and I hope you kill yourself and find peace" or whatever.

 

[thirdrailer]

OP literally agreed with me immediatly. Cope. It's clear actual LGTQ-people want me nowhere.

People on here constantly talk about how everyone is out only for sex and how disgusting it is, but as soon as someone finds out it applies to some special group, all of a sudden that's actually the coolest thing possible. "I hope you can pretend all of the things you saw aren't real, so you can live a meaningless life as someone nobody likes." Fuck off, we're on a suicide forum. You're supposed to nod along and say "Yes, and I hope you kill yourself and find peace" or whatever.

I know you're not replying to me, but I'd like to respond anyway. This is a suicide forum. It's not a forum for advocating for the wholesale murder of an entire category of people, even if done unseriously. Which is what you did. If you were just talking about CTB'ing yourself, you'd probably get the response you mentioned. But you're saying millions upon millions of people deserve to die because you believe each one of them is as monstrous as you believe yourself to be. Even if it were one other person, that would be too many. Make your CTBing about yourself, and please leave every other bisexual on the face of the planet, including me, out of it.

Again, I hope you find peace, whatever that looks like for you.

 

[Tionally]

OP literally agreed with me immediatly. Cope. It's clear actual LGTQ-people want me nowhere.

yeah and that's one person. he doesn't represent his entire sexuality just like you don't represent yours. I'm gay and I support bi people. also all of my LGBT friends support bi people... I'm pretty sure they never even considered that it's a weird thing to suport them.. if I'm gay and I believe that does that mean that every gay thinks so too?? because that comment seems to follow that logic

People on here constantly talk about how everyone is out only for sex and how disgusting it is, but as soon as someone finds out it applies to some special group, all of a sudden that's actually the coolest thing possible. "I hope you can pretend all of the things you saw aren't real, so you can live a meaningless life as someone nobody likes." Fuck off, we're on a suicide forum. You're supposed to nod along and say "Yes, and I hope you kill yourself and find peace" or whatever.

I mean sure not being able to find meaningful connections because everyone is out for sex sucks but hating the people wanting to have only sex and no relationships is weird. they don't owe anything to others and as long as they respect consent they're not doing anything wrong. finding only people who are sex-driven might suck for people looking for something more but calling hypersexual people vile and worse than pedophiles and murders (like wtf????) because of that is just crazy. (you called bi people that because of your assumption that they are hypersexual and only crave sex which I don't believe to be true)
I'm not saying that hook-up culture is a good thing but people having casual sex aren't bad human beings..