• Hey Guest,

    We wanted to share a quick update with the community.

    Our public expense ledger is now live, allowing anyone to see how donations are used to support the ongoing operation of the site.

    👉 View the ledger here

    Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.

    If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC):
    Ethereum (ETH):
    Monero (XMR):
mafuyu

mafuyu

electric angel
Feb 9, 2023
143
title. i haven't done it in a bit, but something triggered me and i've done it a couple times now and it's cool. a good way to release the hatred i have for myself. there's a lot of reasons behind it but too personal for here. can't believe i started this shit over a decade ago.
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: vanillamilk, Burden_Bailey, pretzelsandballoons and 4 others
K

kaitekat23

Member
Dec 16, 2023
30
I felt this, I began cutting when I was 12. It was here and there and managed to get clean from it not much soon after. I relasped here and there but nothing major, until this past summer. I've been clean for about 6 months; the urges are there, I unfortunetly feel like I'll likely relaspe before CTB. I'm realizing the longer I don't do it, the more I hate myself. I'm sorry you feel that way about yourself. I know nothing I say will fill that for you but I hope you're alright
 
  • Like
Reactions: mafuyu
mafuyu

mafuyu

electric angel
Feb 9, 2023
143
I felt this, I began cutting when I was 12. It was here and there and managed to get clean from it not much soon after. I relasped here and there but nothing major, until this past summer. I've been clean for about 6 months; the urges are there, I unfortunetly feel like I'll likely relaspe before CTB. I'm realizing the longer I don't do it, the more I hate myself. I'm sorry you feel that way about yourself. I know nothing I say will fill that for you but I hope you're alright
thanks<3 i had my phases, i'd do it for a while, maybe go a year without, and then do it again. basically how it's gone my whole life. it's never anything too deep or needing medical intervention, never got infected. kinda wish it wasn't stigmatized like damn who cares that i hurt myself, it's not you lol. I just wish I could end it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: pretzelsandballoons
hermestrimegistus

hermestrimegistus

Specialist
Sep 16, 2023
341
Havent cut in years. But i do think about how good it felt when I used to. The kind of relief that nothing else gave me. Put my mind its place when nothing else would. I dont recommend it to anyone else. But I understand the feeling of satisfaction
 
  • Like
Reactions: mafuyu, Ash’Girl and meltdown
meltdown

meltdown

Throw up in your plate
Dec 15, 2023
24
It's a release I crave constantly. It makes me feel like I can breathe fully. A year-ish clean though. Now it feels like missing a friend.
 
  • Like
Reactions: mafuyu
elliestxttoo

elliestxttoo

Oh, once again I am a child
Dec 17, 2023
12
been battling going back to it, thinking of starting it again to release something i guess? i dont want to but something in me wants to at the same time. its a hard fight
 
  • Like
Reactions: mafuyu
Angel of Spades

Angel of Spades

barely keeping it together
May 23, 2023
86
this was actually a reminder i needed — i'm unhealthily obsessed with the scars it leaves behind (i never cut very deep, so i end up with very shallow, white-line scars) and lately i've been having a REALLY hard time... i might end up relapsing some time soon.
 
  • Like
Reactions: mafuyu and 4am
Burden_Bailey

Burden_Bailey

A lonely lesbian
Dec 9, 2023
121
I do it because of self-hatred too! Nice to see I'm not the only one.
 
  • Like
Reactions: mafuyu
notindanger

notindanger

Experienced
Oct 7, 2023
223
Real. I havent done it in over 2 months as i was forced to stop, but i cannot stop thinking about how good it felt. Im going to cut myself tonight, my freedom be damned. I dont give a fuck about whether someone finds out or not.
 
  • Like
Reactions: mafuyu
mafuyu

mafuyu

electric angel
Feb 9, 2023
143
It's a release I crave constantly. It makes me feel like I can breathe fully. A year-ish clean though. Now it feels like missing a friend.
i don't understand why people think it's such a bad thing to do maybe i'm weird but like. i've never needed stitches and i'm clean so i've never had an infection. not sure why that's not a sufficient way to cope.
been battling going back to it, thinking of starting it again to release something i guess? i dont want to but something in me wants to at the same time. its a hard fight
i have my moments where i'll do it for a bit and then forget it
this was actually a reminder i needed — i'm unhealthily obsessed with the scars it leaves behind (i never cut very deep, so i end up with very shallow, white-line scars) and lately i've been having a REALLY hard time... i might end up relapsing some time soon.
heyyy doesn't cut deep gang! i've never felt the need to, thankfully. i can't afford hospital bills like that lol. i used to be obsessed with it too. i was in the ER in july for an attempt and the woman there looked at my wrist and very nastily said "oh, you used to cut yourself." such an odd thing to point out
I do it because of self-hatred too! Nice to see I'm not the only one.
i think it's moderately common, if that helps you feel any better:)
Real. I havent done it in over 2 months as i was forced to stop, but i cannot stop thinking about how good it felt. Im going to cut myself tonight, my freedom be damned. I dont give a fuck about whether someone finds out or not.
see i give a fuck because i'm not going back to the loony bin
 
Last edited:

Similar threads

WanderingGypsy
Replies
2
Views
152
Suicide Discussion
rainatthebusstop
rainatthebusstop
iridescence
Replies
2
Views
67
Suicide Discussion
iridescence
iridescence
comeoutandhauntme
Replies
2
Views
134
Suicide Discussion
comeoutandhauntme
comeoutandhauntme
faraway_sayu
Replies
1
Views
96
Suicide Discussion
TheBestFisch
TheBestFisch
loslassen
Replies
6
Views
457
Suicide Discussion
loslassen
loslassen