For those who have made serious attempts: what were your last thoughts like?

[Kerrtu]

Mt first serious attempt almost was successful. I remember laying down and closing my eyes - I wasn't thinking of anyone or anything in particular, no "life flashing before my eyes" or a sudden montage of my life, etc.

Then I woke back up about a day later and my first feeling was massive disappointment.

I'm better educated in methods since then; when I do finally CTB, I'll be prepared.

 

[AShipinthedark]

Did you reflect over your life? I'm afraid to do that because then doubt may creep in. Sentimentality seems like a thing that would fuck it all up.

All I could think of was my little one....

 

[day]

I attempted with Xanax and tbh I was at peace before I started to panic. I was 100% ready to go but either SI or just the large amounts of medication scared the hell out of me.

Fading in and out of consciousness isn't a great feeling, I was also throwing up because I had drank and was very shallow at breath it overall took control and all my peace was gone.

I thought that I wouldn't have to endure endless suffering anymore and that I was finally free from anxiety and health concerns. I thought that I could finally rest and there wouldn't be anything that could hurt me.

I took 16mg accompanied by 12 beers for anyone wondering what the dose was.

 

[ArchmagePrincess]

When I made my first attempt, despite normally being a very emotional person, I felt almost nothing. I just sort of went through my plan step by step as if I was doing a mundane task at work. I already exploded in anger, and fear, and sadness before, by the time I was attempting it just felt like doing what had to be done.

Now when I woke up later and found myself still alive and stuck in an abusive mental hospital, the emotions came full force with how distraught I was.

 

[hag]

Can't remember any particular thoughts, just overwhelming emotional pain and sadness.

 

[tora]

honestly I don't remember the exact thoughts I had before my attempt; all I can remember was how desperate and terrified I felt. I definitely didn't reflect on my life at all. my emotions were way too overwhelming to think clearly at all

 

[MrDarkness]

My thoughts were that I'm returning in the loving arms of god, sadly I didn't that day