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Mindy

Mindy

...
Feb 10, 2021
30
Hi everyone

I am finally at the point in my life, where I know: it's time. I feel so bad and I can't handle to live this life any longer.

tomorrow I got a time spot because my husband will be out of the house for 24-30 hours. I want to die at home and drinking N in my enviroment beside my beloved dog <|3. Maybe I should rent a hotel room, I am not sure at this point right now :-(

I am also not sure about the dose of my N. I have 25gr and a zopiclone tolerance. That's why I think I should take as much N as i can. Years ago I took meto, so I will take it 1 hour before drinking the N.

Can police track my location? I will delete my apple account before drinking N. I am scared and could not find any post about drinking the powder N. I got it since 2019 at my house.

Thanks for reading. I wish peace to everyone and I feel sorry for every soul- getting to this point in life❤️
 
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Lady black

Lady black

35 male, central Europe, German speaking
Oct 22, 2018
1,192
I wish you a comfortable travel to eternal peace
 
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A_miStake_of_NATURE

A_miStake_of_NATURE

I wish no one had to CTB..........
Aug 14, 2020
703
Whatever you decide, I hope you'll find your peace. I'm sorry I can't answer any of your questions, because I genuinely don't know, but I wish you well, and I hope you really thought about it and it's your final decision.
 
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J

juraviel

PL
Aug 11, 2021
414
are you sure it's the real thing, did you test it? it's really hard to obtain powder n
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,615
I'm sorry you are suffering so much. I understand it is hard to carry on when everything is hopeless. I do not know the answer to your question. I hope you find the peace you are looking for.
 
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Mindy

Mindy

...
Feb 10, 2021
30
Thank you all so much for your kind words❤️

@juraviel: I got it tested back in 2019 in a lab. It is pure.
 
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sully

sully

Experienced
Jul 27, 2021
231
I think it doesn't matter, powdered n doesn't need a lot of water so you can do it fast. You will just pass out very quickly, maybe a minute. You're so lucky that you habe powdered n, its the best way. Good luck
 
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Midgardsorm

Midgardsorm

Paragon
Apr 28, 2020
917
Most people use liquid N here and there is not a Megathread for N yet. I do not know how long it will take to act, but It's very lethal, powder or liquid.
I don't know where you live, but I don't think the police can track you just by posting something related to ctb. And even if they could, it would take a very long while. For N, they could have seized at the PO, if they didn't, they won't know that you have it until you use it.

Know that it's okay to postpone if you're not sure, alright? Since it's powder N, it will last for a very long time.

If you choose to go, I wish you eternal peace.
Be well.
 
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pixie

pixie

.。*♡
May 29, 2021
49
Peace to you
 
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Dead Meat

Dead Meat

DOOMED
Oct 10, 2018
18,394
Wishing you a very pleasant and comfortable journey and may you have everlasting peace and tranquility :heart::hug::heart::hug::heart::hug:
 
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Alwaysbadtime

Alwaysbadtime

Enlightened
Jun 28, 2021
1,158
I would buy it fresh and liquid. How would police know to track your location? Who will take care of your dog? Doing it at your house will ruin the vibe for your husband for the remaining time he lives there.
 
Mindy

Mindy

...
Feb 10, 2021
30
At the point when I'm missing.
My H will come back at home to my dog, so don't worry about him.
 
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Mindy

Mindy

...
Feb 10, 2021
30
Hi guys

didn't make it. I used to have to take Meto a lot (9 years ago). I didn't have any side effects.

When I took it as a state 45 min prior. I was not doing well. I went home again. I was even more afraid of drinking a unknown substance.

At the moment my husband is gone until Tuesday. I have another spot.

I take 7.5 mg of Mirtazapine daily. I read something about which AE could be considered. would mirtzapine be enough in combination with domperidone?

I know you are no doctors, I'm just so desperate and maybe someone got some information.

For me, A's N is out of the question because there is so much to drink and I have trouble swallowing it. That's why I have the powder from C. I still have respect because it doesn't contain 99.9% N, but other unknown substances as well.

Every day is jellyfish full, I have no perspective. I want ctb but am very afraid that I will fail and that I will wake up again or not even fall asleep.
 
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Jumping_realms

Jumping_realms

★☆★ ☠️★☆★
Jul 4, 2021
483
Hi guys

didn't make it. I used to have to take Meto a lot (9 years ago). I didn't have any side effects.

When I took it as a state 45 min prior. I was not doing well. I went home again. I was even more afraid of drinking a unknown substance.

At the moment my husband is gone until Tuesday. I have another spot.

I take 7.5 mg of Mirtazapine daily. I read something about which AE could be considered. would mirtzapine be enough in combination with domperidone?

I know you are no doctors, I'm just so desperate and maybe someone got some information.

For me, A's N is out of the question because there is so much to drink and I have trouble swallowing it. That's why I have the powder from C. I still have respect because it doesn't contain 99.9% N, but other unknown substances as well.

Every day is jellyfish full, I have no perspective. I want ctb but am very afraid that I will fail and that I will wake up again or not even fall asleep.
I'm sorry you didn't find peace, since that's what you are seeking. It's terrible to have failed or missed opportunities you were prepared for. I had another attempt 3 months ago, and just waiting to go. I'm almost prepared with supporting meds. I have been trying to titrate of these benzos and opiates but I'm about to say fuck it and use SN. My substance abuse and antipsychotic won't matter then, and it can be sooner. Sorry for the ramble...

Anyway, I know some people use just Domperidone, so if someone used that with an acceptable tricyclic(I think Mirtazapine is), they probably wouldn't have issue. That is just my opinion, though, I'm not the most knowledgeable as I'm pretty new here, so please don't take only my word for any decision you may make if you are desperate or anything.
 
Last edited:
Mindy

Mindy

...
Feb 10, 2021
30
Thank you for your kind words and the Info. Motilium (Domperidon) I often use, it has his sideeffects but they are okay and not as bad as they are from meto in my case.
 

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