Venting Feeling pathetic for wanting to wait

[glitterpvppy]

I badly want things to be over with. Part of me is obsessed with the idea of dying. I've been putting so much time into researching, but it feels almost impossible to find an accessible method. Because of that, I'm thinking of waiting a few months so that I am able to afford a gun. I don't know how to even make it to the end of this upcoming week.. months sounds impossible. Idk what to do. I want out already. Everything keeps triggering me.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I don't think it's pathetic to wait till you can obtain a method you feel more confident in. It seems very risky to try something impulsively with what's to hand if it may only injure you.

 

[glitterpvppy]

I don't think it's pathetic to wait till you can obtain a method you feel more confident in. It seems very risky to try something impulsively with what's to hand if it may only injure you.

I also don't want to risk hospitalization if it prevents me from obtaining a gun