fear of death and how not to deviate from the plan and preparation of stb for anyone how this all happens

[wsx-rt]

It's hard for me to decide on STB, I can't overcome myself, I feel sorry for my relatives who will suffer, the fear of death and the fact that I may suffer when I do STB, fear in general, although I don't want to live either, I'm tired of the pain and torment, I have already made a decision about STB, but I need to buy and collect everything, and when I talk to someone, I move away from my decision and plan, then it's hard to go back and continue to prepare for STB, I plan for the beginning of June, who Do you have any thoughts on this matter, who is also planning STB at the beginning of June, please write, when you communicate here with people who understand you, it becomes somehow easier