derpyderpins
In the Service of the Queen
- Sep 19, 2023
- 1,848
Yes, I'm sure calling depression, anxiety, etc. a "real" illness is accepted by most people here, but it never will be at large. So many times with me it's the same story: I start a class or a job and do great at first but simply can't keep up. After some time, be it days, weeks, or months, I fall behind and end up spending most of my day not getting work done from distractions/mental blocks/whatever you want to call it. I've done the therapy, meds, excercise, etc. No help.
I know it's horrible, but deep down I wish I could have some physical illness that would garner real pity and patience. Ideally, it would be something that simply explains why I am the way I am: something that changes how my brain works or makes me unusually tired. Then, when someone says "hey where are we on that assignment" I could say "sorry my X has been acting up." If X is something like cancer, the answer is "oh, don't worry, take all the time you need." If X is a mental health problem, you're weak and lazy and a detriment.
Pity is underrated, imo. I just want to truly rest. If it has to be in physical pain in a hospital bed, I'd take it. Then, whatever I'm able to do would be a great accomplishment.
Not looking for help, just wondering if anyone else fantasizes about getting a brain tumor or hurt in an accident or similar.
I know it's horrible, but deep down I wish I could have some physical illness that would garner real pity and patience. Ideally, it would be something that simply explains why I am the way I am: something that changes how my brain works or makes me unusually tired. Then, when someone says "hey where are we on that assignment" I could say "sorry my X has been acting up." If X is something like cancer, the answer is "oh, don't worry, take all the time you need." If X is a mental health problem, you're weak and lazy and a detriment.
Pity is underrated, imo. I just want to truly rest. If it has to be in physical pain in a hospital bed, I'd take it. Then, whatever I'm able to do would be a great accomplishment.
Not looking for help, just wondering if anyone else fantasizes about getting a brain tumor or hurt in an accident or similar.