Failed to make a friend again

[DenizenOfTheDeep]

I've been talking to this girl every Friday from one of my physics labs. She was pretty introverted and a bit difficult to talk to, but we got along well. I tried asking her if she wanted to grab some dinner after class last week and she said she needed to study. On a Friday. I tried again this week and it was the same story. This was our last lab meeting so I'll probably never see her again. I considered asking for her number so we could hang out sometime, but I figured that she just didn't like me and I didn't want to make her uncomfortable. Why do I even try at this point? No one likes me. I still have childhood friends who care about me, but I barely see them anymore. Soon enough I'll be completely alone. Guess I'll just keep bashing my head into the wall until a friend hopefully appears.

 

[dontlook]

I'm sorry, it sucks when interactions fall short. Here's hoping that someone comes along, maybe even here

Do you wanna talk about anything?

 

[DenizenOfTheDeep]

I'm sorry, it sucks when interactions fall short. Here's hoping that someone comes along, maybe even here

Do you wanna talk about anything?

I don't even know if I belong here, on this site. My issues just seem so trivial compared to all of yours. I'm not suicidal. I don't even think I'm depressed, just really fucking lonely. I tried to make a friend here and I think she killed herself so I'm not trying that again. God, I feel so pathetic. I want to be the center of someone else's world, and have them be the center of my world

 

[vanillamilkshakes]

hey, at least you tried! I'm sorry it didn't work out, I hope another opportunity comes along for you :)

 

[DenizenOfTheDeep]

hey, at least you tried! I'm sorry it didn't work out, I hope another opportunity comes along for you :)

Thanks, I'll keep trying :)

 

[Whale_bones]

You've got more guts than a lot of us to try in the first place, so good on you for that! For a lot of women, it can be kind of daunting to give an answer to hanging out with a guy alone for the first time like that. Even if he seems really nice and you're hoping he genuinely he is, many of us have had bad experiences with men who seemed really nice at first, and we have to put safety first.

So I'd recommended suggesting a group hangout for the first one. If there's going to be another girl there, she can feel way more safe taking that chance. The times I've had guys initiate the first hangout by being like "hey, I'm grabbing lunch with my friends Rebecca and James after this, you wanna come?" I knew he was signaling to me that there'd be another girl
there, it's low-pressure and I can feel a lot more confident about safety.

And the group format works great whether you're just looking for a friendship, or hoping for something more. You can start getting to know each other outside of class in a relaxed, low-pressure environment, that allows for a genuine friendship to start, then if you're interested in her romantically, you can gauge her interest and ask for a one-on-one hangout later on.

 

[DenizenOfTheDeep]

You've got more guts than a lot of us to try in the first place, so good on you for that! For a lot of women, it can be kind of daunting to give an answer to hanging out with a guy alone for the first time like that. Even if he seems really nice and you're hoping he genuinely he is, many of us have had bad experiences with men who seemed really nice at first, and we have to put safety first.

So I'd recommended suggesting a group hangout for the first one. If there's going to be another girl there, she can feel way more safe taking that chance. The times I've had guys initiate the first hangout by being like "hey, I'm grabbing lunch with my friends Rebecca and James after this, you wanna come?" I knew he was signaling to me that there'd be another girl
there, it's low-pressure and I can feel a lot more confident about safety.

And the group format works great whether you're just looking for a friendship, or hoping for something more. You can start getting to know each other outside of class in a relaxed, low-pressure environment, that allows for a genuine friendship to start, then if you're interested in her romantically, you can gauge her interest and ask for a one-on-one hangout later on.

Ah, I see where you're coming from. A lot of us guys are a bit dense when it comes to stuff like that. Every time after lab I walked with her alone back to the dining hall which was next to her dorm. She never seemed to be uncomfortable when we talked so idk. I don't know any girls at college so I can't really do what you suggest. I appreciate the advice though, and I'll keep it in mind if I do happen to get a girl as a friend