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drnhng

drnhng

please
Sep 29, 2020
33
Hello SS! My doctor put me on zoloft, and I've been on it for 3 weeks now. It initially seemed to help, but week 2 and onwards as my dose increased my depression came roaring back even worse ever since. I'm wondering on your guys' experience with antidepressants. Have they helped you guys? How many different types have you tried? Or if you quit, when did you realize that anti-depressants were not worth it? Also I'm only on anti-depressants without therapy; how were your experiences with therapy? Thank you, I really appreciate this forum a lot. <3
 
hoping to lose hope

hoping to lose hope

<3 Message me to trade music <3
Nov 14, 2020
849
first off I love your pfp it is so cute and nisu. Reminds me of the girl from Boys on the run manga.

1.it can take 6 weeks for the pills to work so be aware of that
2.it may not work and on average people will have to try 3 different types to find their one
3. antidepressos are not a panacea and only meant to help you feel better enough to help yourself
4. your experience is uniquely yours as is mine they effect people differently so be aware
My experience :
I had terrible side effects from all of mine SSRI and SNRI with one changing my personality and making my depression much worse plus suicidal thoughts.
I do not use them because they only cause harm or make me really numb.

Therapy:
There are different types of therapy and honestly you can learn the skills yourself from reading about them,
the the therapist will aid you in applying them to your life or doin them properly if they are good.
Talk therapy is where you talk to a shrink and how it works for the most part is you verbalize how you feel and the shrink should if good,
be correcting your thinking and maybe helping you see things about the erroneous thought process you have if present.
You can get largely the same results by just talking to yourself, the pet, or a wall.

My experience with therapy and psychologists has been awful and I only now found one that is decent as you have to click for it to be beneficial.
I have done DBT groups and honestly try to read about it yourself because you may find the teachers do not understand the therapy beyond reading shit out in a booklet
and playing youtube videos.
You can learn these skills yourself I think everyone should learn them.
This is just a personal opinion but I would never personally pay to see a shrink as it can be a waste.
You will only get out of all this what you put in and do not expect it to help you feel less depressed but have some hope going in.

I realized anti depressos were a meme after researching studies and seeing how they barely help people at all and even that can be attributed to a active placebo effect.
They can help people but they also can harm people. Oh yeah and the whole feeling numb or making my personality extremely aggressive when I am placid etc etc its all fucked for me.

BUT OP it may help you so give it a try it helps some people but therapy is better and reading about psychology in general to apply skills to your own experience whilst living.
It is all a way to brainwash you into not being so negative despite the world being shit and everyone being better off never having been born.

Would you like to share more OP? you can vent or you can just share your feels I will listen.
 
T

ts0hill

Victim of the pharmaceutical industry
Oct 17, 2020
100
i want to send u a private message but unable to.. try switching ur privacy settings
 
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Panna

Panna

Enlightened
Aug 31, 2020
1,006
Seconding the above, therapy will vary, i've seen people saying that it really helped, I've had a friend who said that being able to verbally his thoughts helped.
In my own experience, it has never been useful. I've had two in the past, and both have given me advice completely useless to a impulsive person with adhd. Imagine a red stop light, think about it, then green for go!. Both have parroted the same information from the same script, which says to me they don't even care what I have by giving me things that would never be useful for me. On top of that, from my experience, they will use whatever you give them if they deem it's 'dangerous' and will go behind your back and report you regardless of how you feel about it.
 
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hoping to lose hope

hoping to lose hope

<3 Message me to trade music <3
Nov 14, 2020
849
i want to send u a private message but unable to.. try switching ur privacy settings
OP is a newfag so cannot be DM'd and maybe they do not want to be dm.

i've seen people saying that it really helped, I've had a friend who said that being able to verbally his thoughts helped.
As I mentioned you can do this all by yourself and get benefits, most of psychology is a meme.
I have had a psychologist fire me because when I finally opened up about my living conditions he could not believe it.
Psychologists generally LOVE to get you put into a psychward I imagine them fuckers jerking their little pencil dick to the idea of getting you warded and also love prescribing antipsychotics to non schizos because when you are too sleepy and numb to feel or think about killing yourself it works wonders.
These fags have played mind games with me to test me and admitted doing so after I BTFO them.
Psychiatrists often have NPD traits and will straight up LIE to you because they are used to being unquestionable authority.
only a fool would take the drugs they prescribe without doing their own extensive research.
 
Panna

Panna

Enlightened
Aug 31, 2020
1,006
As I mentioned you can do this all by yourself and get benefits, most of psychology is a meme.
I agree, the only way that I have ever successfully overcame trauma is through my own thoughts, the only thing that will happen if you truly confide in "professionals" is a nice ticket to be stabbed in the back.
 
hoping to lose hope

hoping to lose hope

<3 Message me to trade music <3
Nov 14, 2020
849
I agree, the only way that I have ever successfully overcame trauma is through my own thoughts, the only thing that will happen if you truly confide in "professionals" is a nice ticket to be stabbed in the back.
The trick is to allude to things enough without them fucking you over they can be faggots.
Even the one I have now who I click with is a meme.
My last session he said some pop psychology meme shit to me that is obvious and I made a quip that even they keked at since it critiques their entire profession.
Have you seen cute anons posts? his therapists are trying to get him to take HRT or become gay as they love to push that nowdays.
 
Dark Spring

Dark Spring

Sobreviviendo
Sep 29, 2020
116
I have been in therapy, with antidepressants and anxiolytics for approximately 5 months. At the beginning I felt very tired all the time, I had no feeling for anything, as the weeks went by my depression returned I do not know if better or worse than before the truth. Beyond the medication I talk to my psychologist every week (it's free for me, luckily) and I feel better getting all my thoughts and ideas out of my mind, I think she cares about me, I feel she has an interest in seeing me get better, But the opposite happens with my psychiatrist who reviews my medication every month, with him everything is different, I feel that he doesn't really listen when I tell him how I feel and how the medication affects my day to day, his only interest I think is that one day I say "oh I feel fantastic, I'm cured of depression".

I hope you can feel better at some point, maybe with the right professionals you can move on. Anyway here you will always be able to find someone to talk to. Hugs
 
hoping to lose hope

hoping to lose hope

<3 Message me to trade music <3
Nov 14, 2020
849
Some things i don't like to talk publicly here. i didn't know new users can't be DM...
I understand as i do not share much here to the point people always ask "are you even suicidal hurr durr"
 
Panna

Panna

Enlightened
Aug 31, 2020
1,006
I understand as i do not share much here to the point people always ask "are you even suicidal hurr durr"
Which is honestly pretty shitty, who cares why a persons here, im not trying to be a shit tier reddit fag signaling, from what i've seen most people who end up here are suffering in one way or another.
 
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hoping to lose hope

hoping to lose hope

<3 Message me to trade music <3
Nov 14, 2020
849
Which is honestly pretty shitty, who cares why a persons here, im not trying to be a shit tier reddit fag signaling, from what i've seen most people who end up here are suffering in one way or another.
They think I am a troll as I tend to shitpost on non serious off topic threads.
I am adjusting to the culture here but the hug box bs can be annoying we can sympathise and be supportive without being superficial.
 
drnhng

drnhng

please
Sep 29, 2020
33
i want to send u a private message but unable to.. try switching ur privacy settings
hi! i'm so sorry; i'm new here and i couldn't find the option.. maybe on discord if you have one? my discord is jindo cat#3332
Seconding the above, therapy will vary, i've seen people saying that it really helped, I've had a friend who said that being able to verbally his thoughts helped.
In my own experience, it has never been useful. I've had two in the past, and both have given me advice completely useless to a impulsive person with adhd. Imagine a red stop light, think about it, then green for go!. Both have parroted the same information from the same script, which says to me they don't even care what I have by giving me things that would never be useful for me. On top of that, from my experience, they will use whatever you give them if they deem it's 'dangerous' and will go behind your back and report you regardless of how you feel about it.
mm i see. thank you so much for your perspective! i am leaning to not get therapy even though my mom wants me to.
 
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hoping to lose hope

hoping to lose hope

<3 Message me to trade music <3
Nov 14, 2020
849
hi! i'm so sorry; i'm new here and i couldn't find the option.. maybe on discord if you have one? my discord is jindo cat#3332
Do you use matrix to chat to people? discord is spyware
 
drnhng

drnhng

please
Sep 29, 2020
33
I have been in therapy, with antidepressants and anxiolytics for approximately 5 months. At the beginning I felt very tired all the time, I had no feeling for anything, as the weeks went by my depression returned I do not know if better or worse than before the truth. Beyond the medication I talk to my psychologist every week (it's free for me, luckily) and I feel better getting all my thoughts and ideas out of my mind, I think she cares about me, I feel she has an interest in seeing me get better, But the opposite happens with my psychiatrist who reviews my medication every month, with him everything is different, I feel that he doesn't really listen when I tell him how I feel and how the medication affects my day to day, his only interest I think is that one day I say "oh I feel fantastic, I'm cured of depression".

I hope you can feel better at some point, maybe with the right professionals you can move on. Anyway here you will always be able to find someone to talk to. Hugs
ah i see. i'm glad i found this community though! makes me feel just the slightest less lonely. i am leaning to not get therapy, so thanks for your perspective !
Do you use matrix to chat to people? discord is spyware
hmm i've never used matrix.. i only use discord to talk with people online
 
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hoping to lose hope

hoping to lose hope

<3 Message me to trade music <3
Nov 14, 2020
849
i am leaning to not get therapy,
Why is this? if possible could you shed some light on the problems you are dealing with?
I do not think it is right to shit all over therapy unless it is talk therapy.
 
drnhng

drnhng

please
Sep 29, 2020
33
Do you use matrix to chat to people? discord is spyware
btw i really sync with your name; it's also the same predicament that i'm in, where I'm stuck in the middle and during the early mornings and late nights I'm more suicidal, but during the daytime and dusk I still work my butt off as a freshman in college towards a degree.. sometimes idk what i'm even working hard for; i just wish my brain could make up its mind on whether or not to commit to suicide so i'm not stuck in this limbo of indecisiveness and peak suffering
Why is this? if possible could you shed some light on the problems you are dealing with?
I do not think it is right to shit all over therapy unless it is talk therapy.
well i think it is talk therapy haha. my mom really does not understand how my depression works, and she's urging for my doctors to go through with therapy, even though i'm just not the type of person who would want that in my opinion. I'm also really busy with schoolwork and my part time job, so i think time each week for therapy would only make my schedule way tighter; actually im writing this as i'm at work haha
 
hoping to lose hope

hoping to lose hope

<3 Message me to trade music <3
Nov 14, 2020
849
btw i really sync with your name; it's also the same predicament that i'm in, where I'm stuck in the middle and during the early mornings and late nights I'm more suicidal, but during the daytime and dusk I still work my butt off as a freshman in college towards a degree.. sometimes idk what i'm even working hard for; i just wish my brain could make up its mind on whether or not to commit to suicide so i'm not stuck in this limbo of indecisiveness and peak suffering

well i think it is talk therapy haha. my mom really does not understand how my depression works, and she's urging for my doctors to go through with therapy, even though i'm just not the type of person who would want that in my opinion. I'm also really busy with schoolwork and my part time job, so i think time each week for therapy would only make my schedule way tighter
What types are these suicidal thoughts anon?
Because you can have suicidal thoughts without active intent to wanting to die and I hope you do not mistake the thoughts for true intention.
I am not a moralfag and if you want to kys I won't tell you not to but we should be looking at things as rationally as we can if mentally ill.
Why do you feel the way you do? have you done introspection at all?

Do you have a friend offline or online to talk openly about how you feel?
You are in a very scary pint in life the choices you make dictate your future and failing college does not mean you will be unhappy unless you are so fixated on conventional success and conformity that you cannot live as anything but the status quo the other worker drones adhere to.

You should always have time to help yourself so here is an idea why not give therapy a chance and go in with an open mind and you an quit if you do not like it.
 
drnhng

drnhng

please
Sep 29, 2020
33
What types are these suicidal thoughts anon?
Because you can have suicidal thoughts without active intent to wanting to die and I hope you do not mistake the thoughts for true intention.
I am not a moralfag and if you want to kys I won't tell you not to but we should be looking at things as rationally as we can if mentally ill.
Why do you feel the way you do? have you done introspection at all?

Do you have a friend offline or online to talk openly about how you feel?
You are in a very scary pint in life the choices you make dictate your future and failing college does not mean you will be unhappy unless you are so fixated on conventional success and conformity that you cannot live as anything but the status quo the other worker drones adhere to.

You should always have time to help yourself so here is an idea why not give therapy a chance and go in with an open mind and you an quit if you do not like it.
i've always had an almost irrational fear that my suicidal ideation might just be me ruminating on the topic too much, and then my depression being a product of the placebo that comes with it.. but by now i'm pretty certain that these suicidal thoughts are "justified" due to how much daily suffering I go through just to carry out my duties. Without going into much detail, I see myself as a leech of society and not contributing anything to any community, I once had so many close friends that I could rely on from different groups, but those somehow faded together from a combination of drifting apart, certain people defaming me behind my back, or conflicts. My main source of daily suffering comes from just sheer loneliness, especially when I can't bring myself to get out of bed, and I would categorize my depression as high-functioning. At this point, I still fear that my suicidal ideation is just in my head and I might end up "killing myself for no reason" if that makes sense, also since any introspection I do is probably biased in my head, but at the same time I can also understand and "justify" why I do want to die through the shit I go through. I plan to go through with SN, since it's easily accessible where I live.


I only have one person that I talk to about this, although recently after a deep conversation with him, I am suspecting that he still clings onto hope for the future, where I am a bit more leaning to suicide. Because of this, I sort of want to tone down my discussion about my suicidal tendencies with him because I feel like my thoughts may influence him and drag him off the path of recovery. I am doing quite well in terms of career path, and I am content with my grades and the college that I go to. I'm just moreso not content with my social situation, as well as just my internal depression which comes biologically from my grandmother. I just feel as though I cannot enjoy life, although if someone were to look at my life objectively in like a blatant resume format, it would seem like I have nothing to be sad about, which is why my parents think that I am just being an ungrateful person.
 
hoping to lose hope

hoping to lose hope

<3 Message me to trade music <3
Nov 14, 2020
849
Suicide is justified as long as we are conscious imo. The idea that we need a reason to be depressed is bullshit as depression does not care about your situation.
The fact you do not seem to have situational depression is grim as it means no matter what happens in the external world your perception is skewed and it is all unenjoyable.

Why do you care about being a leech to society? You have a sense of pride or something for this collective you were forced to join?
Not trying to invalidate how you fee at all about it I just do not understand it on a personal level.
People are shit and they will try to ruin your life or make it harder for you for unknown reasons.
I would have suggested becoming a shut in hikki NEET but you get lonely and hate feeling like a leech.

I understand why you wont continue to discuss your suicidal intent and thoughts with yor friend but it is heathy to express youself anon.
If I knew the answers for your problem I would have solved my own but anhedonia will creep its way through your brain until misery is all you can enjoy
and then you become numb as it is clear you are not even allowed to enjoy crying.

Life is grim OP..
If you do not think you will be able to enjoy life as you do not and it is not because you lack something then suicide does seem like a good option to consider however
I do wonder if being lonely is a substantial cause to how you feel in general?
everything is complicated.
sorry my mind mush is not tingling atm heavy fog
 
drnhng

drnhng

please
Sep 29, 2020
33
Suicide is justified as long as we are conscious imo. The idea that we need a reason to be depressed is bullshit as depression does not care about your situation.
The fact you do not seem to have situational depression is grim as it means no matter what happens in the external world your perception is skewed and it is all unenjoyable.

Why do you care about being a leech to society? You have a sense of pride or something for this collective you were forced to join?
Not trying to invalidate how you fee at all about it I just do not understand it on a personal level.
People are shit and they will try to ruin your life or make it harder for you for unknown reasons.
I would have suggested becoming a shut in hikki NEET but you get lonely and hate feeling like a leech.

I understand why you wont continue to discuss your suicidal intent and thoughts with yor friend but it is heathy to express youself anon.
If I knew the answers for your problem I would have solved my own but anhedonia will creep its way through your brain until misery is all you can enjoy
and then you become numb as it is clear you are not even allowed to enjoy crying.

Life is grim OP..
If you do not think you will be able to enjoy life as you do not and it is not because you lack something then suicide does seem like a good option to consider however
I do wonder if being lonely is a substantial cause to how you feel in general?
everything is complicated.
sorry my mind mush is not tingling atm heavy fog
mm i see, those are all good points, especially the part about not having a choice to be born; thanks for taking the time to lay these thoughts out for me! I guess I'll have to wait a bit longer before I'll be content to commit suicide since I think the virus situation may be making me even more lonely than otherwise..how long will it be until we can dm? I'd love to discuss about your situation too if you are comfortable with it
 
hoping to lose hope

hoping to lose hope

<3 Message me to trade music <3
Nov 14, 2020
849
mm i see, those are all good points, especially the part about not having a choice to be born; thanks for taking the time to lay these thoughts out for me! I guess I'll have to wait a bit longer before I'll be content to commit suicide since I think the virus situation may be making me even more lonely than otherwise..how long will it be until we can dm? I'd love to discuss about your situation too if you are comfortable with it
I think DM is allowed at 24 hours of having an account activated but not too sure also after some posting.
Sorry for not being able to articulate my thoughts properly at the moment but I would really like to discuss whatever you would like to.
It is not too long, hope you enjoy your weekend >.<
Would you like to know the name of a few really good depressing non fiction books?
 
drnhng

drnhng

please
Sep 29, 2020
33
ahh i see; i opened this account a while ago but haven't posted too often, so that must be why. haha sure! I recently read When Breath Becomes Air, which was an autobiography of a top neurologist who was terminally ill, and it wasn't that depressing but was super impactful at the same time
 
hoping to lose hope

hoping to lose hope

<3 Message me to trade music <3
Nov 14, 2020
849
ahh i see; i opened this account a while ago but haven't posted too often, so that must be why. haha sure! I recently read When Breath Becomes Air, which was an autobiography of a top neurologist who was terminally ill, and it wasn't that depressing but was super impactful at the same time
I had not read that but it sounds interesting.
Conspiracy against the human race, heights of despair.
Are both dun to read depressing works of pessimism.

You read the manga pun pun?
you could also probably ask a mod to give you dm abilities by making a ticket
 
T

trigzter

Member
Aug 9, 2019
47
Ive never taken msri's. I simply dont believe they do jack shit except hope for the placebo effect to kick in. The worlds best neurologist couldnt even tell you what to take
 
hoping to lose hope

hoping to lose hope

<3 Message me to trade music <3
Nov 14, 2020
849
Ive never taken msri's. I simply dont believe they do jack shit except hope for the placebo effect to kick in. The worlds best neurologist couldnt even tell you what to take
They can tell you what to take but when you ask them how it works they will sput bullshit.
it is all a sham but some people find they work so there is that
 
T

trigzter

Member
Aug 9, 2019
47
They can tell you what to take but when you ask them how it works they will sput bullshit.
it is all a sham but some people find they work so there is that
Perhaps thats a better way of putting it. No one knows why the pills work/dont work. Just look at those 10 year old commercials ha where A isnt flowing to B correctly. Sums it up
 
drnhng

drnhng

please
Sep 29, 2020
33
I had not read that but it sounds interesting.
Conspiracy against the human race, heights of despair.
Are both dun to read depressing works of pessimism.

You read the manga pun pun?
you could also probably ask a mod to give you dm abilities by making a ticket
mm i see; i havent read that manga before, but i do read a lot of mangas
ill look into it
 

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