Venting Excitement for my CTB day

[dewdfish]

My day is finally coming up and I have never been so excited. My most recent attempts were all impulsive without a pretty solid plan, but this time, it's well thought out, planned through and I'm gonna be alone for the whole day where I can get real high on coke and then finally end everything for once and all. Finished writing up my final goodbyes, and am also doing a thread here on the day to interact with y'all for the very last time. I've been manic and just getting drunk pretty much everyday and this weekend ima party for 3 days and get reaaaaal fucked up. If I do end up dying from an OD then kudos for me, the stuff is already scheduled anyways so it won't matter whether I die this weekend or on Wednesday.

 

[Faith.fornow]

My day is finally coming up and I have never been so excited. My most recent attempts were all impulsive without a pretty solid plan, but this time, it's well thought out, planned through and I'm gonna be alone for the whole day where I can get real high on coke and then finally end everything for once and all. Finished writing up my final goodbyes, and am also doing a thread here on the day to interact with y'all for the very last time. I've been manic and just getting drunk pretty much everyday and this weekend ima party for 3 days and get reaaaaal fucked up. If I do end up dying from an OD then kudos for me, the stuff is already scheduled anyways so it won't matter whether I die this weekend or on Wednesday.

Partying too before I ctb good luck dude

 

[comeoutandhauntme]

hope that no matter what happens to u u get the peace u deserve. safe travels

 

[eggsausagerice]

glad you're finding things to fill your time with even if it's just getting fucked up and partying. it's better than getting extremely anxious about it. it's nice to know your plan will work and you won't have to be prepared to try again afterwards.

 

[dewdfish]

Partying too before I ctb good luck dude

Thank you! Let's party hard asf!!!

hope that no matter what happens to u u get the peace u deserve. safe travels

Thank you so much

glad you're finding things to fill your time with even if it's just getting fucked up and partying. it's better than getting extremely anxious about it. it's nice to know your plan will work and you won't have to be prepared to try again afterwards.

I feel like having to prepare again would be such a pain in the ass, I am certainly not anxious about it anymore and made my mind into taking this decision for the better. Sucks for my cats, though, but I know they'll be well taken care of.

 

[dragon.//]

Goodluck with whatever you end up choosing <3

 

[Faith.fornow]

Thank you! Let's party hard asf!!!

Thank you so much

I feel like having to prepare again would be such a pain in the ass, I am certainly not anxious about it anymore and made my mind into taking this decision for the better. Sucks for my cats, though, but I know they'll be well taken care of.

I have cats too I'm trying my best to make sure there taken care of when I'm gone they are kennel trained so I'm going to put them in there so when emergency services come to remove my body they are all together and hopefully don't see my body. Also so the police or whatever don't have to go searching for them. I'm putting in my will for them to go to a no kill shelter and for them to not be separated because they are bonded, they'll finally be able to get proper care and vetting I can't give them or afford.

 

[Unlucky777]

That's a proper way to go out. Enjoy your last days here before eternal rest

 

[dewdfish]

I have cats too I'm trying my best to make sure there taken care of when I'm gone they are kennel trained so I'm going to put them in there so when emergency services come to remove my body they are all together and hopefully don't see my body. Also so the police or whatever don't have to go searching for them. I'm putting in my will for them to go to a no kill shelter and for them to not be separated because they are bonded, they'll finally be able to get proper care and vetting I can't give them or afford.

Yeah, mine will stay with my family so I know they're good.

That's a proper way to go out. Enjoy your last days here before eternal rest

For real!!! I'm like thriving because the day is so close now

 

[Terrible_Life]

My day is finally coming up and I have never been so excited. My most recent attempts were all impulsive without a pretty solid plan, but this time, it's well thought out, planned through and I'm gonna be alone for the whole day where I can get real high on coke and then finally end everything for once and all. Finished writing up my final goodbyes, and am also doing a thread here on the day to interact with y'all for the very last time. I've been manic and just getting drunk pretty much everyday and this weekend ima party for 3 days and get reaaaaal fucked up. If I do end up dying from an OD then kudos for me, the stuff is already scheduled anyways so it won't matter whether I die this weekend or on Wednesday.

What exactly excites you if I may ask? Do you think after we die there might be something beautiful? Maybe we will arrive to the place where we actually belong ?
Sometimes I was also excited to ctb because then all my suffering would end but also the thought that there might be this huge secret and I will be able to see it what the secret is what will happen after we die. I think it was and still is curiosity.

 

[dewdfish]

What exactly excites you if I may ask? Do you think after we die there might be something beautiful? Maybe we will arrive to the place where we actually belong ?
Sometimes I was also excited to ctb because then all my suffering would end but also the thought that there might be this huge secret and I will be able to see it what the secret is what will happen after we die. I think it was and still is curiosity.

I'm existed to leaving this world full of sorrow and this life of long lasting damage.