Venting Everything hurts so badly

[ijustwishtodie]

Everything just hurts. It's so painful that I have to live. I wish all the time that I was dead. For me, being a human leads into tons of suffering and pain. Just from being a human, I'm suffering to where I have uncontrollable, harsh headaches and chest pains. The only solution to this is death. As long as I remain a human, I'll always suffer from responsibilities that were imposed upon me. Hell, I don't even work, all I currently do is study and even that to me is painful and exhausting for a lot of levels. Fuck, fuck, fuck. It's just so painful and I can't do anything about it as I'm too pathetic to control my life. I wish I was dead so badly.

How do people enjoy being a human? Even through all the responsibilities and work everybody has, they still enjoy life whilst I want to be dead because of the same responsibilities!? I wish I could free myself from the human body jail that I'm in. I'd do anything to be free if I wasn't pathetic enough to where I can't work on being free. I can't do anything at all aside from just sit idly in this pain to suffer. Fuck it all. For me, being non existent is paradise whereas being trapped to suffer in this body is pure hell

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand, in my case I'd certainly always prefer to not exist, it's cruel to me how humans impose existence in the first place and cause so much harm and suffering as a result. Having the ability to exist as a human truly is such an undesirable burden.