Even this website offers no relief from this cruel world

[GreenTree]

The recovery section seems to provide some relief to people. I don't really find any relief in anything these days so it's not uniquely this site which doesn't provide it. However this section of the general forum by it's very nature has a darkness to it. I mean people are committing suicide whilst posting on threads- it's a heavy, upsetting thing and I would be lying if I said it hasn't affected me. I'm just here to hopefully pass on. Who knows if I will do it though...

I only find relief in benzodiazaepems. Wish it was easy to die.

 

[Hope:-)]

I only find relief in benzodiazaepems. Wish it was easy to die.

Coincidentally, that in a strange way is the only thing that could provide me with relief as they are the very last thing I need for my method. Can't seem to find them as of yet though....

 

[FuneralCry]

Funeral cry do you suffer from depression. It sounds like you do. Have you tried any medication.

In my case I think that being depressed is just seeing the world for what it really is. Life itself is depressing. Medication is not a thing that I would need or would help me as my thoughts towards existence are perfectly rational. Suicide makes sense for me as staying alive is only prolonging my suffering all for no purpose. We will all die anyway and be forgotten about so why delay the inevitable.

Non existence is always preferable to living as the dead have no concerns or problems and to die would remove the true cause of all suffering which is life itself, so therefore to me it's objectively the better option, no matter the life circumstances. I see no value or benefit to enduring existence and life could never be worth living. My problem is with life itself. Those people who continue to procreate are delusional as it can never be a good thing to bring life into this world.

 

[GreenTree]

Coincidentally, that in a strange way is the only thing that could provide me with relief as they are the very last thing I need for my method. Can't seem to find them as of yet though....

There easy to blag off a doctor. Say you can't leave the house due to anxiety.

 

[Hope:-)]

There easy to blag off a doctor. Say you can't leave the house due to anxiety.

Tried it twice. Apparently they don't really prescribe them anymore in England. That's what I was told.

 

[GreenTree]

Tried it twice. Apparently they don't really prescribe them anymore in England. That's what I was told.

Guess it depends what doctor you have and how good you are at blagging. I get them without even blagging. Just said I wanted some.

 

[Hanger2]

I know that at this point nothing in this life brings me relief. There really isn't anything here for me in this world and everything just makes me feel more tired. For me personally feeling alone isn't a really negative thing, feeling alone is all that I have known and I would rather be alone but even being on here makes me aware of how alone I am. I've never been able to relate to people at all and I've never really wanted to but sometimes being on here reminds me of why I want to leave. I just feel so disconnected from a lot of the things on here.

Sometimes it doesn't even feel like a forum full of suicidal people when you see people joking about the subject, making light of it, joking about things in general and seemingly actually enjoying life which is strange and to me feels like it doesn't belong on a forum full of people's final goodbyes to the world. Loads of the threads in the main forum often don't seem to be relating to suicide. Anything positive relating to life at all just irritates me. Sometimes this website even feels like social media in many ways. As well as that it's not free from the things that annoy me such as gatekeeping suicide, 'your reasons to die are insignificant' type stuff and 'young people shouldn't ctb'. It really irritates me the whole 'early 20s are so young' type thing, I feel really old and tired even know I'm 21, I don't feel young. So this website isn't free from pro lifers and invalidating posts even know it's meant to be pro choice. Suicide really doesn't need a reason, it's a personal decision.

It's annoying when people invalidate suffering as they don't understand what the other person is going through. We never asked to be here after all, so why should dying even need a reason. Those who just come on here for methods and go are really lucky. I just feel as though as long as people are anywhere something will irritate me. The way that people behave often makes me want to leave this world even more.

Nowhere in life is free from the cruelty of people and I know that I never belonged in this world. Sometimes human interaction just leads to more pain and I'm glad that I never feel lonely. I view life as being such a burden, something really horrible and bad. The things that many others wish for in life don't appeal to me. I do feel very alone in such a pro life world. Only death would bring relief.

Bless u. I feel u.

 

[freedompass]

Non existence is always preferable to living as the dead have no concerns or problems and to die would remove the true cause of all suffering which is life itself, so therefore to me it's objectively the better option, no matter the life circumstances. I see no value or benefit to enduring existence and life could never be worth living. My problem is with life itself. Those people who continue to procreate are delusional as it can never be a good thing to bring life into this world.

Sounds like a possible defence for a serial killer. 'I was just sparing her from suffering your honour, I'm just all heart yanno'. Sorry FC but there's no objectivity here, this is how you feel and that's fine but it doesn't constitute a verifiable statement of fact

 

[FuneralCry]

I view non existence as preferable as I hate suffering and struggling all for no purpose. Every life has some form of suffering in it with the chance of things getting worse at any moment. We cannot guarantee that someone wont end up in the worst pain possible, so therefore to die would be ideal as it would prevent this possibility, but all humans have the right to decide for themselves what is best.

An example of why non existence is preferable is that if someone is under anaesthetic for the day. In that time nothing can hurt them, they have no needs and desires to satisfy and even if they were having a positive life experience (if such a thing even existed) they would be unable to grieve for it. When they wake up, there is a chance of enduring such extreme suffering at any moment so if you think about it from that perspective, non existence is preferable.

Such a thing as a perfect ideal life could never exist due to the inevitability of suffering in life. Only non existence could be ideal as it's the absence of everything. Life causes people unimaginable misery, yet if we were never born we would never feel anything as one would need a consciousness to be able to do that in the first place. The truth is that life is completely unnecessary. I believe that when we die we return to the same nothingness where we were at before we were born where time passed and yet we were not aware of anything. We will all die and be forgotten about anyway eventually so how could there be any value in suffering all for no purpose.

However I'm not forcing my beliefs on others and I'm supportive of those who want to live but the thing that I have a problem with is when they try and force others to live against their wishes. If someone else chooses to live or die, then that is nothing to do with me. I do believe that non existence is the more preferable option but that is just the way that I see life. People can have their own views and come to their own conclusions as to what is more preferable. They can live under their delusions and pro suffering beliefs all they like. And there really is nothing wrong with preferring eternal sleep to an unpredictable and uncertain existence where everything is so pointless and unnecessary.

 

[WaitingForMyRide]

Some choose humour in times of need (me). Never feel that's invalidating your issues and reasoning for being here.

Where ever you see a glimmer of enjoyment, latch onto it for all its worth! You deserve it!!

The only thing that has kept me sane in life is dark humor. Facts. Lol

 

[IanUK]

I know that at this point nothing in this life brings me relief. There really isn't anything here for me in this world and everything just makes me feel more tired. For me personally feeling alone isn't a really negative thing, feeling alone is all that I have known and I would rather be alone but even being on here makes me aware of how alone I am. I've never been able to relate to people at all and I've never really wanted to but sometimes being on here reminds me of why I want to leave. I just feel so disconnected from a lot of the things on here.

Sometimes it doesn't even feel like a forum full of suicidal people when you see people joking about the subject, making light of it, joking about things in general and seemingly actually enjoying life which is strange and to me feels like it doesn't belong on a forum full of people's final goodbyes to the world. Loads of the threads in the main forum often don't seem to be relating to suicide. Anything positive relating to life at all just irritates me. Sometimes this website even feels like social media in many ways. As well as that it's not free from the things that annoy me such as gatekeeping suicide, 'your reasons to die are insignificant' type stuff and 'young people shouldn't ctb'. It really irritates me the whole 'early 20s are so young' type thing, I feel really old and tired even know I'm 21, I don't feel young. So this website isn't free from pro lifers and invalidating posts even know it's meant to be pro choice. Suicide really doesn't need a reason, it's a personal decision.

It's annoying when people invalidate suffering as they don't understand what the other person is going through. We never asked to be here after all, so why should dying even need a reason. Those who just come on here for methods and go are really lucky. I just feel as though as long as people are anywhere something will irritate me. The way that people behave often makes me want to leave this world even more.

Nowhere in life is free from the cruelty of people and I know that I never belonged in this world. Sometimes human interaction just leads to more pain and I'm glad that I never feel lonely. I view life as being such a burden, something really horrible and bad. The things that many others wish for in life don't appeal to me. I do feel very alone in such a pro life world. Only death would bring relief.

Do you expect this site to make you feel better? Here are people like you and I, they feel the same pain, cannot see a way, have either been like this all their life (like me so I've never known anything different) or have become like this so understand what they have lost and for them I feel most. If you want to feel better this is not the place; the only thing you will get here is understanding and validation of how you feel. I never came here to seek solutions I came to see what other peoples experiences have been and advice on methods. I now have enough opioids to end it all so fir me I know I have the exit I need.

 

[FuneralCry]

Do you expect this site to make you feel better

The thing is that for me, nothing could actually make me feel better. I believe that wanting to die is the rational response to seeing life for what it really is, for me life itself is the problem and nothing could take away my dislike for existing. Nearly everything makes me feel worse but often reading about things like death and how horrible life is doesn't. Anything positive makes me feel much worse instead. But I feel like often now this website is no different from anywhere else in the world and I posted about that in my original post. As long as anywhere where people are there will be no relief from suffering, and nowhere is free from the hostility of humans. Only death could bring relief.