Eating Disorders Support Megathread

[Myforevercharlie]

This is a Megathread where members who struggle with an eating disorder can post their experiences, vent, connect with others in a similar situation and give/receive support.

You can post as often or as infrequently as you like. Share as much or as little as you feel comfortable with.

This thread is intended to offer support and guidance for users who struggle with the effects of their eating disorder, rather than discussing the specifics of weight loss or how it was achieved or posting comments that can be perceived as ' pro-ana' or indulging.

 

[jessisme]

Doesn't this belong in Recovery?

 

[Dot]

Doesn't this belong in Recovery?

All spport megathreds whch r currntly consold8td in th/ Peer Spport Megathreds Complatn - currntly pinnd in Suicde Dscussn sectn - wll shrtly b accssble frm bth Suicde Dscussn & Recvry sectns

 

[Haruka]

Hi, I hope that I'm not doing anything wrong (I haven't seen anybody post in this thread yet, if this thread is still being worked on please feel free to remove my post). I am a 19 year old girl who developed anorexia when she was 16 pre-COVID, and it only got worse throughout the pandemic. I'm about 5'4-5'5 and I weighed a little around 7 stone (98lbs, 44.4KG) at my lowest - it may have even been slightly under. After my mother's death I was forced into recovery and got up to a much healthier weight by the time my 18th birthday rolled around. I'm now living alone for university and my weight has plummeted again. I'm not sad about it, but it took me a while to get to 7 stone, so I doubt that I'll ever be that skinny and bony again before I CTB. I have no idea what my weight is right now, but I have evident bones (chest bones, back of ankles, ribs, spine) that are quite prominent, and my legs and arms are also very small and my wrists and hands are very bony. I'm loving who I am starting to become again - but I move out of here in July and I'll be at home until I move out, if I reach my mid-20s (which hopefully will not happen), meaning I'll be forced back into 'recovery', which I really would like to avoid. If anybody else is experiencing something similar or would like to talk about it, my DM is open or you can reply to this post if you aren't comfortable DMING / cannot DM yet. Thank you for reading this

 

[tsykoais]

yes yes yes thank you! i suffer from an anorexia binge type (not bullimia) and body dysmorphia. whenever i eat i feel fucking disgusting but at the same time i can't control myself, i start purging for days/weeks and then the cycle continues.

 

[Jezzibell]

I am old enough that I should have learned by now. I'm 52 and have had anorexia subtype binge and purge for 35 years. I am very underweight and have been for the last 5 years. I weigh 22kg but have been down to 16kg. I'm 153cm.

This last relapse was all about dying. But my body just keeps going. No matter how many diuretics or laxatives I take. It's not that easy to die from AN BP.

yes yes yes thank you! i suffer from an anorexia binge type (not bullimia) and body dysmorphia. whenever i eat i feel fucking disgusting but at the same time i can't control myself, i start purging for days/weeks and then the cycle continues.

I feel you. I don't have periods of binging though. I binge heavily 20k+ calories but otherwise I'm OMAD and purge this.

I don't have dysmorphia either. For me its not about being thin. Its about hoping its a means to an end. X

 

[terminalending]

yes yes yes thank you! i suffer from an anorexia binge type (not bullimia) and body dysmorphia. whenever i eat i feel fucking disgusting but at the same time i can't control myself, i start purging for days/weeks and then the cycle continues.

I love your sulli pfp! And maybe this is ednos? Or is it most likely bulimia? I'm a bulimic myself so it seems familiar!

 

[tsykoais]

I love your sulli pfp! And maybe this is ednos? Or is it most likely bulimia? I'm a bulimic myself so it seems familiar!

tw calories:

thank u! i'm thinking maybe ednos because isn't bulimia consistent binging/purging? i binge maybe 2 times a week then purge. my longest purge was 3 weeks of just liquid fasting. i usually restrict abt 300-500 cals and when im purging i usually just fast (either liquid or just dry). i'm 5'4 and went from 144 to maybe 120 something in a month. i'm also anemic and get heart palpations sometimes so maybe the ed will kill me before i kms lol!

my binges are like 1,500-2000 cals which would be normal for most people but the amount of food guilt i feel is immense. i took like 6 laxatives within a two day span and my bowel movements haven't been the same since.

For me its not about being thin. Its about hoping its a means to an end. X

feel this, for me it was also about control. i'm also omad when i restrict.

 

[terminalending]

tw calories:

thank u! i'm thinking maybe ednos because isn't bulimia consistent binging/purging? i binge maybe 2 times a week then purge. my longest purge was 3 weeks of just liquid fasting. i usually restrict abt 300-500 cals and when im purging i usually just fast (either liquid or just dry). i'm 5'4 and went from 144 to maybe 120 something in a month. i'm also anemic and get heart palpations sometimes so maybe the ed will kill me before i kms lol!

my binges are like 1,500-2000 cals which would be normal for most people but the amount of food guilt i feel is immense. i took like 6 laxatives within a two day span and my bowel movements haven't been the same since.

feel this, for me it was also about control. i'm also omad when i restrict.

bulimia can be any type of purging (vomitting, over excersing, laxatives, fasting, etc), and binges is not about how much you consume, and inside is about loss of control around food. but if you think it's ednos then it might be!

 

[Kodokushi]

I uh hope you don't mind if I let my frustrations out? I'm a binge eater, do believe it's some sort of a coping mechanism maybe, cause I can't remember when exactly it started as if I always used food for comfort and back in the day when my family was poor af it was also a luxury. What I absolutely hate is how obese I've become. I used to be such a pretty child, like a little fairy, only to turn into this monstrosity

So every time I lose control and binge, then gain, I'm so pissed at myself I want to rip all this weight off with my own hands. It's not even good food ffs, I eat literal trash cause I can barely afford anything, but it's still in big quantities and weird "combos" resulting in thousands of calories...

I don't know what to do about it. I don't want to have this body, it pisses me to insanity. Eating is already such an issue (hate taking care of bodily functions) and these eventual binges out of nowhere don't help at all

 

[ejt]

I am old enough that I should have learned by now. I'm 52 and have had anorexia subtype binge and purge for 35 years. I am very underweight and have been for the last 5 years. I weigh 22kg but have been down to 16kg. I'm 153cm.

This last relapse was all about dying. But my body just keeps going. No matter how many diuretics or laxatives I take. It's not that easy to die from AN BP.

I feel you. I don't have periods of binging though. I binge heavily 20k+ calories but otherwise I'm OMAD and purge this.

I don't have dysmorphia either. For me its not about being thin. Its about hoping its a means to an end. X

How are you alive at your low weight or even at your current weight? You're not very tall, I know, but those weights are less than a small child!

I have always hoped my ED would kill me but I've never been at a super low weight/BMI. I've been low enough for people to be concerned at times, but never on the verge of death or anything. Every time I purge, I hope it kills me but it never does. Laxative ODs have made me feel like I'm dying, but they've never done any serious physical harm. Bodies are very resilient!

 

[Jezzibell]

How are you alive at your low weight or even at your current weight? You're not very tall, I know, but those weights are less than a small child!

I have always hoped my ED would kill me but I've never been at a super low weight/BMI. I've been low enough for people to be concerned at times, but never on the verge of death or anything. Every time I purge, I hope it kills me but it never does. Laxative ODs have made me feel like I'm dying, but they've never done any serious physical harm. Bodies are very resilient!

Hi. I'm AN BP and not restrictive. It makes a difference and I do supplement but like now when I'm too ill to eat I go into decline fast. I don't know if its more candida in my oesophagus. Or pleurisy. But I'm losing weight fast which is bad. I'm so tired I can't keep my eyes open.

 

[ge0rge]

eating disorders and disordered eating are the worst. they're the only reason I haven't taken my SN yet -- I'm quite a bit overweight and I don't like the risks of SN not working.

 

[fatraccoon]

ive been binging a lot these past few days. its like i cant control anything and i just want to eat even if im not hungry. it fucking hurts, and also taking laxatives was such a horrible idea. i think ive done irreversible damage. but its fine bc if i hurt myself more is more comforting than healing myself.

 

[blacktulip44]

i've been feeling very depressed lately, binging junk food and then feeling like shit and trying to purge even though i know im unable to do so. i kinda wanna get back at the restricting part of my ed (ana/binge combination) but i know how much it hurts everyone else and myself when they find out. still, im almost purposely looking for encouragement to restrict again.
i cant dm yet but yeah, itd be nice to talk to someone.

 

[Jezzibell]

i've been feeling very depressed lately, binging junk food and then feeling like shit and trying to purge even though i know im unable to do so. i kinda wanna get back at the restricting part of my ed (ana/binge combination) but i know how much it hurts everyone else and myself when they find out. still, im almost purposely looking for encouragement to restrict again.
i cant dm yet but yeah, itd be nice to talk to someone.

So sorry you are going through this. My eating disorder has taken everything from me. And yet I cant stop.

 

[willitpass]

I told my therapist today about how I've been over exercising by walking to burn off all calories I eat in a day and some…. I told her this while walking during the entire therapy session (I do online therapy). I found it a little bit amusing haha, gotta find a way to have a laugh somehow.

 

[cgrtt.brns]

ive always had a bad relationship with food. as a kid i was a picky eater bc of (undiagnosed at the time) autism but my parents forced me to eat whatever i was given by yelling at/punishing me for wasting food, this still affects me today and i feel physically painful guilt around wasting anything. when i experienced any kind of negative emotion i always resorted to comfort foods, making me quite a chubby kid which i despised. being teased for my weight in school made me develop body dysmorphia. every summer holiday since early primary school (age 6) i fantasised about losing so much weight that people would finally like me when school started again.
in secondary school (age 12) i developed anorexia, which eventually developed into mild bulimia due to my habit of resorting to comfort food i learned as a kid.

Spoiler: possibly triggering, description of my experience

i was constantly obsessed with food, it was all i could think about when i wasnt in a classroom and i can still remember how frustrating and upsetting it was to just sit infront of the kitchen cupboards for hours staring at all the food but not being allowed to eat any of it. having to memorise the calorie count of every fruit and vegetable, obsessively reading the nutrition information on everything, risking being yelled at and punished just so i didnt have to sit at the dinner table and stare at the plate of food my mum made me, feeling sick just from the smell of food, all while my brain was screaming at me both to EAT EVERYTHING YOU CAN FIND and NEVER EAT ANYTHING AGAIN. i cannot begin to describe the hell that is the experience of physically seeing yourself as a fat bloated whale while everyone around you saw you as a skeleton. body dysmorphia drove me to paranoia and i blamed everyone around me, including friends, for lying and tricking me into eating just to make me fatter so i would stay disgusting. i so desperately wanted to be a skeleton, i longed to be so thin that i was invisible and eventually die from it.

due to developing an ed i havent grown in height since i was 12, and went from the tallest kid in class to the shortest, ive been 5"4 since the beginning of secondary school. i remember as a kid my mum saying she expected me to grow really tall lol woops.

Spoiler: tw: mention of weight and frustration about weight loss/gain

my lowest weight while actively anorexic was 7 stone. when i started college i began to recover and managed to have a somewhat healthy relationship with food, yet annoyingly my weight dropped to 6 stone before eventually gaining weight. this has always annoyed me, the fact that i tried so fucking hard for years to get below 7 stone, yet the moment i recover i finally reach lower than my goal, only to have it snatched away from me because i had recovered lmao

now, ive developed an unhealthy relationship with food again, and am currently 9 stone which freaks me out. luckily im not as obsessed with food as i was, i would rather die than go back to that mentality. however i do want to go back to my old weight and restrictive habits. ive gotten to a point where i physically cant eat much bc of my appetite being quite low, and its bringing back feelings of wanting to restrict again. i still resort to comfort food quite regularly, this is what i wish to restrict the most, bc i feel so disgusting afterwards.

i could go on for a long time about this topic but i feel like ive said too much already lol. it was nice to get it all out. i havent addressed my eating habits in a very long time, since i tried therapy for it at 14 which made it worse for me, so this was kinda cathartic for me in a way lol. if anyone read this all im sorry idky i cant just explain things in short sentences lol

 

[Jezzibell]

ive always had a bad relationship with food. as a kid i was a picky eater bc of (undiagnosed at the time) autism but my parents forced me to eat whatever i was given by yelling at/punishing me for wasting food, this still affects me today and i feel physically painful guilt around wasting anything. when i experienced any kind of negative emotion i always resorted to comfort foods, making me quite a chubby kid which i despised. being teased for my weight in school made me develop body dysmorphia. every summer holiday since early primary school (age 6) i fantasised about losing so much weight that people would finally like me when school started again.
in secondary school (age 12) i developed anorexia, which eventually developed into mild bulimia due to my habit of resorting to comfort food i learned as a kid.

Spoiler: possibly triggering, description of my experience

i was constantly obsessed with food, it was all i could think about when i wasnt in a classroom and i can still remember how frustrating and upsetting it was to just sit infront of the kitchen cupboards for hours staring at all the food but not being allowed to eat any of it. having to memorise the calorie count of every fruit and vegetable, obsessively reading the nutrition information on everything, risking being yelled at and punished just so i didnt have to sit at the dinner table and stare at the plate of food my mum made me, feeling sick just from the smell of food, all while my brain was screaming at me both to EAT EVERYTHING YOU CAN FIND and NEVER EAT ANYTHING AGAIN. i cannot begin to describe the hell that is the experience of physically seeing yourself as a fat bloated whale while everyone around you saw you as a skeleton. body dysmorphia drove me to paranoia and i blamed everyone around me, including friends, for lying and tricking me into eating just to make me fatter so i would stay disgusting. i so desperately wanted to be a skeleton, i longed to be so thin that i was invisible and eventually die from it.

due to developing an ed i havent grown in height since i was 12, and went from the tallest kid in class to the shortest, ive been 5"4 since the beginning of secondary school. i remember as a kid my mum saying she expected me to grow really tall lol woops.

Spoiler: tw: mention of weight and frustration about weight loss/gain

my lowest weight while actively anorexic was 7 stone. when i started college i began to recover and managed to have a somewhat healthy relationship with food, yet annoyingly my weight dropped to 6 stone before eventually gaining weight. this has always annoyed me, the fact that i tried so fucking hard for years to get below 7 stone, yet the moment i recover i finally reach lower than my goal, only to have it snatched away from me because i had recovered lmao

now, ive developed an unhealthy relationship with food again, and am currently 9 stone which freaks me out. luckily im not as obsessed with food as i was, i would rather die than go back to that mentality. however i do want to go back to my old weight and restrictive habits. ive gotten to a point where i physically cant eat much bc of my appetite being quite low, and its bringing back feelings of wanting to restrict again. i still resort to comfort food quite regularly, this is what i wish to restrict the most, bc i feel so disgusting afterwards.

i could go on for a long time about this topic but i feel like ive said too much already lol. it was nice to get it all out. i havent addressed my eating habits in a very long time, since i tried therapy for it at 14 which made it worse for me, so this was kinda cathartic for me in a way lol. if anyone read this all im sorry idky i cant just explain things in short sentences lol

I feel every word. I was always the chubby teen as my grandmothercooked the most unheathiest of food. It was all fresh ingredients but laden with cream and gravy. Plus I went to boarding school where.you ate quickly to get seconds and filled up on sugar sandwiches. My routine is always the same pattern - healthy eat right exercise - binge and then just relapse.

I get what you say about not being so food obsessed. I'm my 30s I was very successful and although I was still purging, it was not the priority. This relapse since 2016 I have only concentrated on food. I then got a serious diagnosis and have refused treatment- why? I don't want to spoil a good meal with nausea and vomiting and I no longer want to live with anymore pain or mental anguish. I am so ready to ctb. No more pain. No more eating.

I had to look up me in stone because I couldn't work out 7. I am much shorter than you 5ft I am 3.5 stone. When I started the weight loss I was 9.5 stone. My frame and bones are very very small. And I've lost muscle mass but that is also the disease. .

 

[cath55555]

weekend before last I got kinda drunk at my friend's and spilled about how bad my ED is atm. the 2 friends there (including the one whose house we were at) already knew about my bulimia, but bc I was drunk I ended up crying for the first time in... 3 months ish? but anyway it was really embarrassing because when I went upstairs to purge after eating literally half a dozen crisps, one came up to make sure I was okay and I couldn't purge in front of him :(( hence the crying...

 

[cgrtt.brns]

I feel every word. I was always the chubby teen as my grandmothercooked the most unheathiest of food. It was all fresh ingredients but laden with cream and gravy. Plus I went to boarding school where.you ate quickly to get seconds and filled up on sugar sandwiches. My routine is always the same pattern - healthy eat right exercise - binge and then just relapse.

I get what you say about not being so food obsessed. I'm my 30s I was very successful and although I was still purging, it was not the priority. This relapse since 2016 I have only concentrated on food. I then got a serious diagnosis and have refused treatment- why? I don't want to spoil a good meal with nausea and vomiting and I no longer want to live with anymore pain or mental anguish. I am so ready to ctb. No more pain. No more eating.

I had to look up me in stone because I couldn't work out 7. I am much shorter than you 5ft I am 3.5 stone. When I started the weight loss I was 9.5 stone. My frame and bones are very very small. And I've lost muscle mass but that is also the disease. .

i really appreciate you taking the time to read and reply to my rambling, thank you <3
im so sorry youve been suffering for so long. this disease is one id never wish upon even my worst enemy. i definitely relate to "no more eating", food and the need to eat has become just such a burden to me, i know i should be grateful to have easy access to nutrition but ed just makes that impossible. i hope you find peace soon. i genuinely wish you all the best.

 

[Realkitten]

Why does food taste so good?
My friend told me she didn't eat for a week and she got super skinny, so I wanted to try that for myself. I decided to go on a one week "fasting". While I was fasting, my father brought home food like he knew what I was doing (he don't normally buy food). I couldn't hold myself back and just ate everything. Then I started binge eating again... sigh.

 

[Homulily]

I've had a eating disorder for around 6-8 years (i forget when exactly I got it, it was a very gradual thing at first, sorry I don't know the specific year)
I got mine through insecurities about being good enough for my partner at the time.
From there it slowly started to grow into what it is now. I have anorexia.
I am not in recovery for it, im not going to be posting pro-ana stuff even though im not in recovery I just wanted to talk about mine and how it fucks with me.
we on the same page?
good.
I have very strong co-dependent tendencies.
anyways.
little bit of context I am a women who is into women
I have never felt good enough for any of my partners. and with every additional relationship that failed my insecurities and my eating disorder became worse. I'm not going into specifics or the causes for it, thinking about it too much makes me feel really anxious.
One of my previous relationships fueled it. (not the example im going to be talking about)
they would tell me to starve myself for affection, they would tell me to throw up after I ate anything. whenever I messed up they told me things that I still read over sometimes if I want to motivate myself to lose more weight.
because to me its all true they didn't say anything that was wrong.
now.
Im going to be using my most recent relationship and the most important to me as an example for how my ed affected it.
I was convinced she was going to be the one. I had bought a ring, we were together for around 3 years.
at first she really helped to fight my ed. the first time we kissed was because I was really anxious about going to eat together, so she kissed me to try to make me feel less anxious, I felt so happy, even now thinking about it I feel giddy because like, up to that point, I had believed that eating at all made me completely undeserving of affection, she knew this I told her about my eating disorder, so to see her try to prove the opposite made me feel special and like, really cared about.
overtime she started to lose interest in me, and treated eating very differently around me.
My dumb brain took these as connected and ran with it and I became convinced and I am still convinced that I needed to lose weight for her, I want to lose weight for her now, I want to show her I can be good enough for her affection again. I dont mind that she threw me aside to persue a different girl within a week of breaking up from me. it really hurts but I don't mind being hurt by her she could hurt me and sometimes has and I still dont mind at all.
she never physically hit me or anything her insults were verbal and always ruined my day because well, I love her.
she got mad at me once for not being able to pick out a restaurant to go to because im scared of food, she got really mad at me and told me that her ex who was toxic did the same thing and I felt awful I didn't want to be like her bad ex. I picked out a place and we ate but I felt horrible I felt so fucking anxious. I didn't want to remind her of her bad ex I wanted to be good. I really wanted to be good so I did my best and she didn't seem happy and that made me feel worse and I just
i made myself throw up after eating it feels like that was suppose to be a test that I failed, that I should of answered that I didn't want to eat and then she would of been happy, thats what I tell myself at least. I know i shouldn't be so anxious about this even thinking back to it but thinking back to it makes me feel like there is something standing on my lungs. this year when I vented to her about how im relaxing she just replied with "okay :)" and started talking about how shes focusing on herself more lately which
im happy for her, i really am, she could of just told me she couldn't handle that right now or something.
maybe im being too selfish thats probably the case so I decided to never talk about my eating disorder to anyone I date again I don't want to bother them.
I want to fix myself to look like the girl shes into.
I want her to be nice to me again she use to be so thoughtful, just, little actions that weren't hard to do, like, just holding my hand a little if she saw I was anxious eating like she use to do.
that made me so happy when she would do that.
but she lost intrest. probably because she realized I need to be losing weight, I really need be losing weight.or she coulnd't deal with me anymore.
she told me she never actually had romantic feelings for me when we broke up.
I want to be hers again I want her to actually love me this time I'll show her i can be good enough to be with, I wont even think about proposing to her, she knew I wanted to propose, I never actually did because of how she reacted and how she treated me after she knew, she mocked me a few times for it, I know not to think about doing it again, I want to be forgiven for fucking it all up and to actually be a good partner for her.
i sometimes fantasize about her telling me to starve myself. or i edited messages to make it look like she was telling me to.
I
i love her so much she could treat me awfully and I still would. I know I need to be abused i dont care.
I want her back so much.
I hate myself so much for eating in front of her before. in the moment she would tell me she was proud but I know it was probably a test to see if i was actually good enough to be loved. a test i failed. I know I did.
Im happy I have my eating disorder.
im happy im really scared of being around food, Im happy I know what I need to do to be good enough for affection. I just want her back.
im really happy I have my eating disorder. im going to continue losing weight for her. to try to show her im sorry and to apologize for being a bad partner to her, the fact she was with me for 3 years without holding any romantic feelings for me, I must of been a fucking awful partner. I must of been the worst, I thought I was good because i thought I made her happy but now I know. I want to sh after thinking about all this I need to punish myself for failing her.

 

[cgrtt.brns]

Spoiler: vent

idky but whenever a friend skips a meal or refuses food around me it triggers me so much and i feel so disgusting for eating. i just want to never eat again but i use comfort food as a coping mechanism, i hate myself for it so much. im so disgusting, ive gained so much weight and i look and feel bloated and awful. i just cant fucking stop eating. why wasnt i born skinny like my brother. why do i have to be fat even when i eat barely anything. i tell myself every day im not going to eat today, then five minutes later im gorging on junk because im sad, and immediately regret it afterwards and feel disgusting, but i keep doing it. i wish i could move out so i didnt have access to food and could be in control of what i eat. i hate myself so much.

 

[pochacco12]

thank you for this, i have struggled with ednos for the past 12 years. it's been on and off, but because things are bad again, i'm spiraling back into it.

 

[just_so_done]

I'm so fucking frustrated right now. I've been restricting to under 300 calories for like 2 months and when i do eat its all been healthy. theres been a few binge/purges so i get why the weight goes up but now its just plateaued. i'm so sick of trying this hard and the scale not moving and then on other days spending hours infatuated thinking about food nonstop. its exhausting. and today i'm just feeling angry because i've been so good and even had a couple days of no food and yet still barely losing if at all so its triggered a binge today. i know im going to regret it and be pissed at the scale tomorrow, reversing all the hardwork ive accomplished, im just tired of constantly avoiding comfort foods when before thats all i ate. I just need to accept i'm going to feel like shit and can't even be anorexic without fucking it up.

 

[Jezzibell]

I'm so fucking frustrated right now. I've been restricting to under 300 calories for like 2 months and when i do eat its all been healthy. theres been a few binge/purges so i get why the weight goes up but now its just plateaued. i'm so sick of trying this hard and the scale not moving and then on other days spending hours infatuated thinking about food nonstop. its exhausting. and today i'm just feeling angry because i've been so good and even had a couple days of no food and yet still barely losing if at all so its triggered a binge today. i know im going to regret it and be pissed at the scale tomorrow, reversing all the hardwork ive accomplished, im just tired of constantly avoiding comfort foods when before thats all i ate. I just need to accept i'm going to feel like shit and can't even be anorexic without fucking it up.

You need to increase your intake otherwise your body will remain in starvation mode and hang on to every liquid and solid. Basically you need to stimulate your metabolism. Take a few days with increased uptake. Do not not drink. Otherwise you will get water retention.

 

[istheretrulyalife?]

I don't think I have an eating disorder but for many years sweets have been my go to comfort thing.

I lost weight and still exercise but I constantly eat sweet food every day. It's instant gratification for me and if I go a day without it I get down in the dumps.

 

[just_so_done]

You need to increase your intake otherwise your body will remain in starvation mode and hang on to every liquid and solid. Basically you need to stimulate your metabolism. Take a few days with increased uptake. Do not not drink. Otherwise you will get water retention.

i know you're right but i hate the idea of increasing my intake but nothings changing so i guess i need to. ive been having lemon water in the mornings to try to stimulate my metabolism but also doesnt help that my one meal is in the evening so prob doesnt get enough time to break down. thanks for your suggestions and listening. hope you're hanging in there!

 

[liljeep]

Hey, just introducing myself in this thread in case I post later... I have OSFED, atypical anorexia subtype. I had it as a teen but was in a binge/restrict cycle so maintained my weight. Over the past 6 months, I have lost 49 lbs and not had any issues with binging. I officially relapsed in March but was dieting before that; just not calorie counting, having the obsessive thoughts, or starving myself.

It was pretty much just a low carb diet that became very low calorie too when a medication made me lose my appetite - I stopped that med very late February and it made me panic. I did not want to gain any weight back or maintain, so I relapsed, and it is to me much more serious than my first merry go round with my ED.

But I am still not even at a healthy weight, I am overweight. I don't know what health complications I may have by the time I am at my goal weight considering the length of time it will take to get there. But I am hoping to speed it up further.