Method Drowning of vacation

[SophieMakesGames]

My plan was to drown on vacation maybe as soon as i got here.

I got super sun burned and stuff and was distracted with the events and so now it's day 2.

We leave today at 1am

We where supost to stay until tommarow and I planned to die tonight so I'd get to experience the vacation before death.



Now its going to be really hard but I don't think impossible, just need to wait for a time when most or all people are away or asleep or something and then skip down to the ocean and then go as far out



There's dolphins and sharks we saw them. I wonder if any will eat me lol. I don't mind, as long as I die tbh. And at least I'd be helping something

And dolphins are my favorite animal they are so pretty, it wouldn't be super bad to feed one with myself I think idk .




Other then that I'm going to try to go far down or get lost in a current, overall no oxygen very deep and not able to swim is the goal.




I regret not doing it on the first night a lot, I honestly don't know what's wrong with me. I really hope I have a chance to tonight.




If not I think I'll either try hanging or drinking alcohol then trying to drown myself in a tub or some kind of water,


Or trying to get my hands on my cousins firearm

I never liked guns so I don't have one, I really wish I did, it would make this a lot easier and painless.





I wish I didn't have to be alone.

I know everyone says you don't, but they all refuse to help and no one else will either and even 988 hangs up on me after enough time and even my therapist can't help me no one and nothing can and it's my fault.

Everyone wants me in a ward, and I'd rather be in prison, why should I be put in a place I hate, people say they care and have empathy, then let me die, where is your empathy for my suffering, I want to die please.

 

[TooManyChances]

I'm sorry that you are going through this. Looking at your post, it seems you are considering many options. Are you on vacation with family? Friends? Maybe they could offer help.

About the method, drowning is a good one, tho it will hurt quite a bit and your SI will be through the roof, cause I have tried it too. Beware there might be watchmen guarding the beaches at night, to stop drunk people from having accidents.

I hope you find peace.

 

[SophieMakesGames]

I'm sorry that you are going through this. Looking at your post, it seems you are considering many options. Are you on vacation with family? Friends? Maybe they could offer help.

About the method, drowning is a good one, tho it will hurt quite a bit and your SI will be through the roof, cause I have tried it too. Beware there might be watchmen guarding the beaches at night, to stop drunk people from having accidents.

I hope you find peace.

I didn't think about anyone guarding the beach or anything, and I know it'll hurt I've practice it before in the bathtub and been able to inhail quite a bit of water not enough to kill me tho sadly


So based on that and my bodies reaction to water I think I can go deep breath in then my natural body reaction will be to breath more then more then more and I'll be dead


At least in the tub that's how it worked only I couldn't hold my head under for too long.



Thank you for your reply, and I've failed too many attempts to not consider back ups.
And no one else supports my suicide.

I didn't think about anyone guarding the beach or anything, and I know it'll hurt I've practice it before in the bathtub and been able to inhail quite a bit of water not enough to kill me tho sadly


So based on that and my bodies reaction to water I think I can go deep breath in then my natural body reaction will be to breath more then more then more and I'll be dead


At least in the tub that's how it worked only I couldn't hold my head under for too long.



Thank you for your reply, and I've failed too many attempts to not consider back ups.
And no one else supports my suicide.

I was told that if I kill myaelf I'll never be forgiven and I said I don't deserve to be forgiven.
I am on a third story beach house for the vacation (not paid for by us) and I was thinking maybe I could jump but I'm terrified of heights so my judgement about how far down is off


I am pretty sure I could jump i definitely have the will to die more then fear of heights and so jumping won't be an issue the think is idk if it's far enough and I'd rather drown cus I don't wanna be paralyzed or something,


It's only 3 stories idk how tall

 

[TooManyChances]

I didn't think about anyone guarding the beach or anything, and I know it'll hurt I've practice it before in the bathtub and been able to inhail quite a bit of water not enough to kill me tho sadly


So based on that and my bodies reaction to water I think I can go deep breath in then my natural body reaction will be to breath more then more then more and I'll be dead


At least in the tub that's how it worked only I couldn't hold my head under for too long.



Thank you for your reply, and I've failed too many attempts to not consider back ups.
And no one else supports my suicide.

I was told that if I kill myaelf I'll never be forgiven and I said I don't deserve to be forgiven.
I am on a third story beach house for the vacation (not paid for by us) and I was thinking maybe I could jump but I'm terrified of heights so my judgement about how far down is off


I am pretty sure I could jump i definitely have the will to die more then fear of heights and so jumping won't be an issue the think is idk if it's far enough and I'd rather drown cus I don't wanna be paralyzed or something,


It's only 3 stories idk how tall

It seems you are on some sort of private property? Then I guess no guards will be there.

Also, whoever tells you that "you won't be forgiven" is just manipulating you, they don't know how you feel. I'm not telling you to ctb, but it is your choice that matters, whether you do it or not.

Last, DO NOT jump from a 3 story building, i repeat, DON'T do it. The height is too low. I live in a 5 story building and I would never consider jumping. Has to be at least 20 stories to be honest. Some people have survived crazy heights. So listen to your instincts, DO NOT jump.

 

[SophieMakesGames]

It seems you are on some sort of private property? Then I guess no guards will be there.

Also, whoever tells you that "you won't be forgiven" is just manipulating you, they don't know how you feel. I'm not telling you to ctb, but it is your choice that matters, whether you do it or not.

Last, DO NOT jump from a 3 story building, i repeat, DON'T do it. The height is too low. I live in a 5 story building and I would never consider jumping. Has to be at least 20 stories to be honest. Some people have survived crazy heights. So listen to your instincts, DO NOT jump.

Okay thank you.

Your words mean allot

 

[knickknack81]

A few years back, I was in Mexico with some friends and went swimming in the Pacific Ocean. I got pulled in by the undertow and next thing I know I further out then I expected. I kept swimming towards the shore but I wasn't making that much movement. I was starting to get very tired and was struggling to stay above water. and I really thought "is this it? Is this how I'm going to go?" Luckily, I humongous wave came in and knocked close enough the shore front that I was able to feel the bottom with my ocean was able to get to the water. Although extremely freaked out by the experience I was safe.

I only tell ya this story because as this was happening, my fear level was at the highest its been my entire life. And this was by accident what happened to me. I can only image with yr SI levels will be if try to do this on purpose. I am not trying in any way to persuade you, you do what you got to do. Just trying to make you aware of what it will be ill mentally and emotionally when you make an attempt at something like this.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.