It's funny to notice that most of the people who write here about their suicidal thoughts are people who have gone through some stages of formation, they at least have a job, some have friends, and some even have a family. They have become full-fledged enough to continue living in case of anything. I feel even more miserable, even against this background. I hate myself even more for not being able to finally kill myself.
If I had friends, a family, a job, it would mean that I would not be as miserable as I am now. If I have nothing, then this is one of the possible symptoms of worthlessness. However, now I just want to die, these thoughts are just a reflection of what brought me here and why I must die.
I'm 33, since 15yr old I've wanted to kill myself. From 15yr to 33yr I've experienced friends, gfs, study, work, pets, my house, and I still want to kill myself. So, good luck.
I think measuring your self worth to the people around you or what you have is a bad idea. You can have friends and it doesn't make a difference, because sometimes families and friends are our triggers. And working might keep you busy but most people aren't happy from working. The money would be nice but bills take it all. Everything is a bill. But what is stopping you from making friends or finding a job? I know it's hard to find people we have things in common with the older we get. And I also understand it takes time to find work, but you will get there eventually. I know how exhausting it can be, whatever you decide to do, I hope you find peace however that is.
it's sad that a "normal" person wants to die, while all kinds of "defectives" (like me) are not only incapable of killing themselves, they can reproduce and spoil the lives of others.
Everyone has their own level, probably. I have not satisfied even the basic needs, and I already want to disappear, precisely because of my worthlessness.
Sometimes I try to do something so that I don't die miserable, but I can't do anything. If I could, I would write an application for the donation of my organs after death, in this way I would bring at least some benefit, I would show that there was at least something "good" in me (for example, a liver, heh)
It hardly makes sense for me to do anything, because I feel that my roof has already fallen off. Now I live with constant thoughts about how I ruined everything. It's too late now. I would not like to die miserable, but I will not fix the past, and I will not bring back the lost future. the post was just about the fact that, it seems to me that most of the people here, !who think they are terrible!, in reality they are not, they are better than they see themselves. It's sad that I'm not part of that "group". I feel that I spoke something stupid, and was not able to express what I wanted. Sorry
It is a pity that people who were able to become full-fledged also suffer. I cannot think deeply about this topic, I am far from them. I'm too dumb.
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I also believe with all my heart that I'm shit and I worth nothing. Also I know those are consecuences of abusive parents and a shitty childhood.
I went to psycology therapy, psychiatrist terapy, meds, rehab (cause I started to do drugs), and I still can't have peace or enjoy simple things.
So... you may think that having friends, job, gf, sex, or whatever that a normal person has It's what doesn't make you worthlessness. And If you are like me, will try your best to have all those things and you're still going to want to kill yourself.
Also, you have to choose, if you are not gonna kill yourself, do whatever it takes to answer this question "what am I if I'm not worthlessness?" and accept that you are choosing to life and not kill yourself, and do the fuck you want with your life.
And if none of that works, be like me, a future normal ghost.
Bye!
I went to psycology therapy, psychiatrist terapy, meds, rehab (cause I started to do drugs), and I still can't have peace or enjoy simple things.
So... you may think that having friends, job, gf, sex, or whatever that a normal person has It's what doesn't make you worthlessness. And If you are like me, will try your best to have all those things and you're still going to want to kill yourself.
Also, you have to choose, if you are not gonna kill yourself, do whatever it takes to answer this question "what am I if I'm not worthlessness?" and accept that you are choosing to life and not kill yourself, and do the fuck you want with your life.
And if none of that works, be like me, a future normal ghost.
Bye!
