Discussion Does sexuality stop mattering once you found someone?

[Life_and_Death]

you dont know what/who(?) you consider yourself as but you found someone you plan on spending forever with. Does it still matter?
(im trying to leave it as an open ended question without personal information, so i hope i gave enough information )

 

[Suicidebydeath]

If you found somebody and you're happy it doesn't matter imo. It's nobody else's business.

 

[Life_and_Death]

It's nobody else's business.

its not about it being someone else business, its about your own curiosity and wanting to know about yourself

 

[Suicidebydeath]

You're free to put limits on yourself and your sexuality, or not. Ask yourself why should it matter? Normally people care about what society would think, if you don't care and it's about yourself, why would you constrain yourself?

I guess you could be honest with the other person and let them know it's not your usual orientation. I would probably have to do the same thing and admit that I've never been with X, Y or Z before and wasn't sure whether or not it was going to work out. They deserve that much.

Besides that, I don't think it matters.

 

[Ash]

I'm single but I've been out for so long that I genuinely forget.

 

[Linda]

you dont know what/who(?) you consider yourself as but you found someone you plan on spending forever with. Does it still matter?
(im trying to leave it as an open ended question without personal information, so i hope i gave enough information )

If you're comfortable with someone, it doesn't really matter what you consider yourself to be. Labels can sometimes be more of a hindrance than a help, so perhaps you should just forget about them.
It only becomes difficult if you have a fairly clear sexual orientation and the person you have met and like is not the sex you normally prefer. In that case, proceed with caution. It may work out, but I have seen many cases where it did not work well. In such a case, it is important that you are open and honest about the situation with your partner. Also, it would be wise to wait at last a couple of years before making any binding commitments (like getting married, having kids, etc.).

 

[loweroneseyes]

sexuality is just a label for your experiences. it's good to know that part of yourself, but if you don't have it entirely figured out yet that's alright too

 

[Jiyuurakka]

If the question was directed at me and I found later that I was different to what I was before, it wouldn't matter to me because my decision to stay by someone's side forever is not truly dependent on physical intimacy. It's much more based on how comfortable I feel expressing myself around them and finding that harmony between us, and usually a good romantic relationship is just an extremely comfortable platonic relationship that's interlaced with lots of intimate moments, whether it be through hugs, cuddles, or just that safe touch.
I think sexuality gradually stops mattering as you get older. But of course people are different and everyone has certain needs, if the importance of that aspect outweighed their previous decision to be committed, I wouldn't blame them if they chose otherwise, although a proper discussion can be had between the couple to reconcile the difference.

 

[BojackHorseman]

you dont know what/who(?) you consider yourself as but you found someone you plan on spending forever with. Does it still matter?
(im trying to leave it as an open ended question without personal information, so i hope i gave enough information )

I am pansexual. I am not ashamed and I have nothing to hide, but it's not my entire identity. I am in a monogamous marriage, so I'm not looking for another partner, so I do consider it irrelevant now in a way. It's still a part of me, but not a really relevant part anymore. Im still active in LGBTQ discussions and such, like I decorated the breakroom at my work during pride week and had educational pamphlets and bracelets and such. Just because you enter a monogamous relationship doesn't mean you are any less queer, or straight, it just doesn't seem relevant if your not looking for a partner. But even if your looking for a partner, your sexuality doesn't need to be the main part of your identity, you have many other things that make you an interesting individual.

 

[etherealgoddess]

you dont know what/who(?) you consider yourself as but you found someone you plan on spending forever with. Does it still matter?
(im trying to leave it as an open ended question without personal information, so i hope i gave enough information )

I'd say I definitely don't care as much as I did before, but I'm still confused lol. I appreciate men, but I always have been confused on where I stand with women.

 

[AmericanMary]

I am pansexual & polyamorous. I could not care less about somebodies gender, sexuality, etc. I literally do not care how somebody identifies. I will embrace them in whatever way they chose.

This has opened up a lot of doors for me. You're able to really focus on connection & energy with the PERSON. Their soul, their mind. You're not limited on who that connection may be with. I believe when you're able to look deeper and form a connection with someone that has no connection to their biological identity or physical features, it is so much more intimate. My life has CHANGED since I realized this and started living my life this way. My relationships have been so much more intimate. I have found the "right" people to commit to.

I've eaten edibles so this might be a ramble lol.. but in essence, I do believe that sexuality can be overcome or lose meaning when you mean somebody that you truly connect with.

True Love is very powerful. It is very dangerous.