Venting Does It feels your effort matters as nothing?

[TheDizzenter]

Anyone ever had a quite feeling, that, even trying, nothing of your effort is important? That you are just some other bag of flesh in this world?
That no one would cry for you after your death or deep inside, sorrow for one week or two?
The feeling of not being relevant for nothing, and unable? Even if with incapacity yet, judged at the eyes of these who don't understand?
Perhaps do you feel It about yourself?
That life is just going as a clock, knowing the worse is about to reach you, and you will fall?
Did you ever feel pathetic, while the others did reach something?
That they give you a high value, but when you didn't request? So when they expect so much of you, and you fail, you fall completely?
The fact you aren't essential for anyone? A dead weight?

The simple fact that being dead would solve everything? Even you feel deep inside a coward or a scared-y cat to reach something?

 

[Darkover]

yeah nothing really matters

 

[FuneralCry]

Of course no longer existing would solve everything for me as there are no disadvantages to being dead. Life in itself is the source of all problems after all.
But I just think it's the reality that our existences are so incredibly insignificant, as nothing can matter to us once we inevitably leave this world. Life is just a temporary, futile distraction from the fact that we are just destined to die anyway, eventually we likely won't even exist in the memories of those who continue to stay here.