P

Pallf

I'm tired
May 27, 2018
357
For these last couple of years I've been a frequenter of certain suicide method websites when I'm depressed and I get this ridiculously happy feeling when I read up on the different methods. I feel like I'm in control of my life when everything else is going to shit.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: LADY007, LittleJem, pthnrdnojvsc and 22 others
wanttodie

wanttodie

Enlightened
Apr 19, 2018
1,800
yes
get happy while looking up suicide methods noing one day all die be all be happy when i end it
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: Dead Meat, shadow11, dano6533 and 1 other person
C

Caerula

Student
Mar 20, 2018
145
So true. I've always wondered if it's abnormal to feel so good looking up suicide methods.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Nessa, dano6533, Cyanide and 3 others
Hanger

Hanger

Noosedancer
May 29, 2018
277
Yes especially when I think about me doing the method
 
  • Like
Reactions: Nessa, Deleted_9cKnXB34QG, dano6533 and 5 others
chronicpainnomore

chronicpainnomore

Not Circling the Drain Anymore
May 31, 2018
310
I lull myself to sleep every night imagining pulling the exit bag down over my head and breathing deeply.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Deleted_9cKnXB34QG, dano6533, Cyanide and 5 others
El Topo

El Topo

(---)
Apr 21, 2018
478
yes
get happy while looking up suicide methods noing one day all die be all be happy when i end it

Is that really you in your profile picture? I remember someone posted that on 8chan, but I thought it was just a joke.
 
  • Like
Reactions: dano6533, Cyanide and wanttodie
L

Life sucks

Visionary
Apr 18, 2018
2,136
I fantasize about good or painless methods like being in a nitrogen filled room. I fantasize about magically being dead all the time.

I get some happiness while researching because of the hope and the feel like I'll get something magical although I get no new results.

I think if suicidal people started researching scientifically together they can find something new always. I think there are suicidals in each field of knowledge. Prolifers aren't the only ones who develop stuff.
 
  • Like
Reactions: dano6533, Cyanide, Nihilistnow and 4 others
chronicpainnomore

chronicpainnomore

Not Circling the Drain Anymore
May 31, 2018
310
I fantasize about good or painless methods like being in a nitrogen filled room. I fantasize about magically being dead all the time.

I get some happiness while researching because of the hope and the feel like I'll get something magical although I get no new results.

I think if suicidal people started researching scientifically together they can find something new always. I think there are suicidals in each field of knowledge. Prolifers aren't the only ones who develop stuff.
Speaking of nitrogen filled rooms, here is a news story about a sperm bank in Augusta, GA that had a leak in the liquid nitrogen system and killed a police officer and almost killed a sperm bank employee. The officer went in to rescue the employee and was overcome so fast by nitrogen I doubt he even knew what happened. This is a sad story because it was an accident, but for our purposes, it shows how awesome nitrogen is.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LADY007, lv-gras, dano6533 and 2 others
wanttodie

wanttodie

Enlightened
Apr 19, 2018
1,800
Is that really you in your profile picture? I remember someone posted that on 8chan, but I thought it was just a joke.
yes it is my profile picture? way are you asking
 
  • Like
Reactions: dano6533, Cyanide and anna
El Topo

El Topo

(---)
Apr 21, 2018
478
yes it is my profile picture? way are you asking

It might not be a good idea to put your real photo on here. If someone who knows you somehow found this website, they could call the police and possibly get you sent to a psychiatric hospital.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LADY007, dano6533, Cyanide and 4 others
Imaginos

Imaginos

Full-time layabout
Apr 7, 2018
638
I'm too lazy to look up extraneous information like that, so I guess my answer would be no. I know exactly how I'd like to commit suicide. The problem is actually doing it. To be honest, looking up additional methods, even on the few occasions when I have bothered to do it, actually only serves to depress me since it essentially just acts as a painful reminder of how astronomically unlikely it is that I'll ever be able to carry it, or any other method, out to completion.

As far as just fantasizing about suicide in general, that's basically my number one hobby. A hundred little simulated deaths inside my head that I can replay and savor to my heart's content. It doesn't bring me happiness per se, but more a resigned comfort (if that makes any sense). As if, for a brief moment, I can feel the calm of oblivion take hold of me, almost like I really were dying (albeit in a very idealized, make-believe way). I don't know, man. I mean, I've also thought about death/suicide for so long now that it's basically just become a permanent fixture of my brain. The same way some people have daily recurring thoughts about the weather or their job or some other stupid bullshit, for me it's death. It's not even a conscious choice at this point. I just get up and that's what I think about it.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Tiburcio, dano6533, Cyanide and 1 other person
wanttodie

wanttodie

Enlightened
Apr 19, 2018
1,800
It might not be a good idea to put your real photo on here. If someone who knows you somehow found this website, they could call the police and possibly get you sent to a psychiatric hospital.
did not thank of that thanks i changed it
 
  • Like
Reactions: dano6533, Cyanide and El Topo
DF90

DF90

Experienced
Mar 18, 2018
275
I know my suicide method now, but I always felt a strange calmness when I was looking for one.
 
  • Like
Reactions: lv-gras, Deleted_9cKnXB34QG, dano6533 and 3 others
Meena

Meena

Student
Jun 7, 2018
138
Every time i go to bet i imagine myself breathing charcoal. It makes me feel calm and i forget all my problems.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Empty gas can, dano6533, Caerula and 1 other person
P

Pallf

I'm tired
May 27, 2018
357
I imagine myself in an apartment using the exit bag method and l feel myself drifting away peacefully.
I really enjoy the setup to the method because it allows me to take control of my life and it makes me feel responsible, if that makes any sense.
I get goosebumps thinking about it, and I think about it very often.
 
  • Like
Reactions: lv-gras, dano6533, Caerula and 1 other person
Kogoruhn

Kogoruhn

Student
May 20, 2018
109
It calms me to know that we have an escape from suffering, although making the decision is not easy.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Journeytoletgo, LADY007, mustard_glass and 8 others
P

Pallf

I'm tired
May 27, 2018
357
It calms me to know that we have an escape from suffering, although making the decision is not easy.
Yeah pretty much this. This isn't a decision I'm making lightly, but I don't see myself getting any better so suicide is quite possibly an inevitable ending for me.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Caerula, ninaevol, Deleted_9cKnXB34QG and 2 others
E

Elaina

Student
May 16, 2018
103
It makes me sad that so many people feel that they need to resort to it. Myself included.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LADY007, Caerula, lv-gras and 4 others
M

millefeui

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2018
1,035
Not happy, but knowing I will eventually put an end to this misery calms me down.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Journeytoletgo, Caerula, ninaevol and 4 others
Zanexx

Zanexx

Dead
Jul 15, 2018
189
I know this is an old thread, but recently reading on suicide methods and talking to other people about suicide is the only thing that makes me feel slightly happy. I find it pretty much impossible to do anything else now, so that's the only thing that is able to distract me temporarily from the abyss which has become normal.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Caerula, lv-gras, shadow11 and 1 other person
L

leader-akiko

Member
Jul 30, 2018
17
I fall asleep to the thought of me bleeding out; I frequent this site specifically for good methods. Love the site, but not the suicidal thoughts.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Caerula
J

JessMcGuire

New Member
Aug 11, 2018
4
The research and the planning aspect really appeals to my type A personality. It brings me a sense of calmness when my anxiety is crushing me. I'm glad to have found this board. I wish so many people weren't struggling and this board didn't need to exist in the first place, but I appreciate the honest, no bs discussions that are allowed to happen here.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LADY007, Caerula, Lrdhlpme and 2 others
ninaevol

ninaevol

Member
Aug 2, 2018
58
I can definitely relate. My whole life I've felt like others have had more control in what happens to me than I do. This is the only thing I feel I have control and power over. I finally feel like I have a choice.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LADY007, Caerula and Deleted_9cKnXB34QG
C

Comatose11

Mage
Jul 26, 2018
572
If I think they would work, I do. I think fantasizing about my death is a coping mechanism for me.
 
  • Like
Reactions: ninaevol, Caerula, Tiburcio and 1 other person
D

Deleted member 847

Guest
What would make me happy is having something with me that would easily kill me whenever I want regardless if there's people at home. The quit button is justice and freedom. I wish one day we'll have a society where living and dying are choices not obligations.
Quit-Button-846x604.png
 
Last edited by a moderator:
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: Journeytoletgo, ARW3N, Caerula and 3 others
BasedGod

BasedGod

Break the chains
Aug 13, 2018
39
Yeah, it's a sense of relief for me. Like one thing is going the right way.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LADY007, Caerula and lv-gras
Tomasnil

Tomasnil

Mage
Apr 24, 2018
519
I wouldnt say happy but it calms me down alot
 
  • Like
Reactions: betteroffdead, Caerula, Livide Lamb and 2 others
T

Tiburcio

Guest
Only knowing there is an exit to life, I feel calmed. Now I only wish I really could do it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Caerula and lv-gras

Similar threads

legoshi
Replies
1
Views
625
Suicide Discussion
OccydePoes
OccydePoes
N
Replies
1
Views
171
Suicide Discussion
Trav1989
T
let.me.let.go87
Replies
11
Views
251
Suicide Discussion
FuneralCry
FuneralCry
mistymoo
Replies
29
Views
1K
Suicide Discussion
Ghostgirl
Ghostgirl
B
Replies
3
Views
385
Suicide Discussion
standingfast
standingfast