Venting Does anyone hate themselves so much to the point of ctbing

[Praestat_Mori]

Why do you hate yourself?

I can tell you, despite I failed big in life and that's the reason why I'm suicidal don't and I cannot hate myself for that bc it has been totally out of my control.

Maybe you hate yourself bc of uncontrollable things?

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I hate myself but I'm a genuinely awful person so it's deserved. I'm too cowardly to even effectively drive people away.

 

[agony1996]

i hate everything about myself. i remember hating myself ever since i was a child. being mistreated and disliked by your own family really does numbers on your self image. i hate how i've never been able to be normal. i used to be insecure about every little thing about myself and some of those insecurities are gone but the self hatred hasn't left. i hate my personality the most now. the way i act and think and talk and feel because i know i'll never be able to change it. it's the main reason i drive people away. it's why everyone thinks i'm a freak and i hate feeling this way and being seen as crazy by everyone in

I'm sorry you were mistreated by your own family, that's definitely going to impact the way you view yourself later on but they're the problem not you.
I get the self hatred though, not feeling normal and feeling like you'll n ver be able to change it that's what I feel.
I'm sorry you're going through it but you can always talk and vent here, on here no on is going to hate you

 

[dolemitedrums]

No I like myself well enough.

 

[hereornot]

I'm trying hate myself to avoid SI.

 

[agony1996]

It just feels right to hate myself tbh, like listening to a song about health care and laughing as you sing the words cuz you know you'd stab yourself right through the heart if only you feared pain and uncertainty press and hated yourself just that teeny bit more... I hate everything about myself, my behavior, my thoughts, my appearance, my voice, the way I perceive myself even, even in the times I don't hate myself, it all seems so pointless, I feel so pointless. I can't think of anything that I don't hate about myself, even my positive traits have some sort of negative catch to them cuz I can't just be decent in any way... I cannot wait to die, I hope it's soon, I hope it's now, in the next few seconds, and it won't be and that annoys me and makes me sad and I hate that about myself too, I wish I could just will myself dead... This post is too long and I hate myself for that too, rambling idiot...

I'm sorry you're suffering and struggling with this too. It's horrible cause you can't get away from yourself, you're just stuck being this person that you so desperately don't want to be

I hate myself to my very core, I can't forgive myself for my past actions I've done terrible things to people. I've also hurt two people I love deeply and I hate myself for pushing them away they deserved better. I can't look at myself without feeling immediate disgust. What I've done is a big motivator for me to ctb. I just hope it's enough to compensate for all the awful things I've done.

I get you but everyone has done terrible things to others at one point or another so you shouldn't be so hard on yourself for that

Why do you hate yourself?

I can tell you, despite I failed big in life and that's the reason why I'm suicidal don't and I cannot hate myself for that bc it has been totally out of my control.

Maybe you hate yourself bc of uncontrollable things?

I wish I had control over the way I feel.
I hate the way I look and I feel so stupid, when I use to b so smart since I have absolutely no interaction with anyone I've lost my brain cells. I'm even embarrassed to post on here cause my spelling and punctuation has gotten so bad but mostly I hate the way I look and can't stand anyone seeing me.
Do you think you set the standards as to what you want to achieve in life to high?

 

[Deleted member 94706]

I cannot stand myself, I can't forgive myself for what I've one. I hate constantly obsessing over something I did months/years ago, it never goes away. Guilt is literally the most painful feeling in the world, nothing is more painful.

 

[Kurai]

Yes I dislike myself very much, I'm better off dead

 

[ceriseange♡]

Does anyone want to ctb so badly because they hate themselves to the point that they can't see anyone and are in complete isolation. Self hatred is the worse feeling in the world, especially if there was a time in the past when you were so confident.how can a person live like this? I hate the fucking universe it's my birthday in 5 days and I'm so angry why does the universe put us through this sometimes I feel like it enjoys watching me suffer. I hate life I hate myself I hate everything I just want to go.
I wonder if anyone else feels this way about themselves

I hate myself. All the time - but I also don't? It's hard to explain. There's just so much pain and disappointment and shame. Things that used to be easy for me, even the most simple things, are now so incredibly challenging. For no reason other than my own mind. It's frustrating. I'm so angry and sad all the time and I hate myself so much for letting myself get to this point that I feel like I deserve to ctb. I trust the universe no matter what, in the littlest ways it's always been good to me. If I end up giving my molecules and energy back to it I see it as a thank you in a way.

I just hate how I turned out and how I let myself get this bad.