Does anyone else feel productive when they’re on here..

[mekhi]

The research, planning, exploring.. oddly enough it makes me feel "good"? This forum is sadly my only outlet and source of socialization I get throughout the day. I think it can be addicting honestly. Reading others experiences, methods, testing them out on your own.. It makes me feel strangely 'alive' for once.

 

[h4ppyhypoxia]

yes me too, because it gives me some hope, i can finally start to see the light at the end of the tunnel, and its not really like i have many serious obligations to attend to, since im ending my life, planning my method is my main project at the moment, so i feel productive when i dedicate time to it

 

[CopingWithSenility]

I have only recently started but yeah, I weirdly feel productive. I guess because in our own way, We're working towards a goal, a final one, something we find important and freeing, something ultimate and final.

 

[RazzleDazzle]

I don't necessarily feel productive, I'm just breaking down and this feels like the only place where people could understand.

 

[Lost in a Dream]

I feel very productive on here some days, but it really does depend on the day. Sometimes it's because I'm working on writing projects in Off Topic, but other times it's because I'm offering my support and understanding to people who need it. Even on my bad days I love it here.

 

[FluffIsJustice]

In regards to methods for ctb it does not help me that much as I already did a lot of research before knowing about this place so I already knew what I wanted to do (where and why). But it helps ground me in reality if that makes sense? Because otherwise I just float somewhere (often in fantasy worlds). (And being 'grounded' does help me get things done, so I actually am more productive)

 

[PeaceSeeker83]

Yep...I feel fine on here now. It just reinforces that ending things is for the best. Can be a little upsetting at times though and there are certain topics I bypass.

 

[SkeletonFlower96]

No, I already have enough information; I don't like sitting here forever talking about methods without actually doing anything. But I'm so tired to do the other things I planned before the CTB that I'm practically at a standstill, doing nothing at all.

 

[desiderium]

I also feel productive. when browsing this forum. I think it's because having a plan to ctb is a safety net for me. Knowing that there is always a way out is comforting to me. If things get worse, get unbearable, it'll be okay- I'll have a solid plan and protocol to follow to make everything alllllll okay again. Permanently.

That's why it's so satisfying to me to read about others' experiences and methods. It's borderline euphoric to plan out my own demise. Every detail, every step, brings me closer and closer to the comfort of having a genuine plan. It's like being productive towards the last project you'll ever work on.

 

[mekhi]

No, I already have enough information; I don't like sitting here forever talking about methods without actually doing anything. But I'm so tired to do the other things I planned before the CTB that I'm practically at a standstill, doing nothing at all.

This is valid. Sometimes I feel like the peace I feel from being on here has a downside at times. Feeling like I'm wasting time. Or that this is keeping me from doing anything.