I would gladly finisht today, but the question is how. I don't want to fail and ending up vegetable. I feel regretfull for my parentes (they are 65 and 70, I'm not a teenager, I'm 39), but ending up vegetable, blind... is too much, for me and for them. Hit by a train? one in twenty survives. Nitrate? You can survive too. Jumping? The same. And so on with whatever way you choose to go, save Nembutal. Have I to personally to Mexico? My god...
Excuse my poor english.