Discussion Do you think that suicide is your destiny?

[ultrasharpy123456]

I wonder about all the things I could've done in my life Even if I had gone to school I wonder if I would've gotten a job. i would've tried to go to school for art but I don't really know if they have jobs for artists other than freelance work and that is hard to get.

I'd probably still just have a useless degree and maybe I'd end up working as a waiter or in grocery store. So tbh I'm not sure if my life would be so different After all I'd still be suicidal. I think it's my destiny as to how I found out about this site.

I have behavioral problems, things about me that I can't control. I think even if I had a job I would be fired from it or I would quit out of fear.

 

[ShotgunShell]

I relate to this a lot. I too am an art student and feel the same way about my degree. By the time I realized I didn't even like art anymore, it was too late as I'm like 3 3/4 years into my degree and it doesn't make sense to just drop out yet.

Because of this (plus a lot of other factors lol), I really do feel like I was put on this planet just to blow my brains out. Why else would I be here?

 

[Methuselah Fallen]

I'd say so. As many times as I've been at this point, and as much as I cannot see a future with myself in it, I think I was always supposed to die before 'my time'. Like I was meant to vanish years ago, and I've been wandering as a lost ghost. Something about my character, feels like I was always supposed to die by my own hand, that it's the only accurate end to the story, the arc.

 

[Clairvoyance66]

Yeah. I've thought about suicide almost half my life and I really don't see my life ending any other way. I'm like a moth to a light, I'm just obsessed with the idea. And I don't mean to be. I don't feel like I ultimately have any other options as I feel like I've exhausted any other options I may have at this point, but I think if I could let the idea of suicide go I'd have the time to solve my problems. Like, if I were able to not feel stuck in a suicidal state of mind maybe I could wait it out a little longer. But it's been something I can't get out of my head, like an earworm, for the longest time, and I just need to have agency now. I want to take my life into my own hands.

 

[TAW122]

I believe that it is certainly where I'm headed, and after having lived for more than three decades of this shitty existence, I know that beyond a doubt, I will CTB. It is just a matter of when, where, and how. I, of course will not want to risk failure so I will do whatever I can to make sure that I have the best odds of success before I attempt.

 

[FuneralCry]

Voluntarily exiting this world is the only thing that really feels right for me, I'm not meant for existing and only the peace that nonexistence brings is what appeals to me. But sadly I feel trapped here as leaving this hellish world isn't straightforward, it's so cruel how despite suicide being the most logical option, it's purposely made so difficult for us. I know that if suicide was easier I would be long gone by this point as I've never wished to exist here at all and could never do.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Nope, suicide is the byproduct of choosing not to cope with an inferior life.

 

[Hugh Class]

I fully believe in Fatalism.... i could control my day to day existence.... but could not avoid my ending. Suicide is my destiny.

 

[thisiswhoiam-]

My destiny is being a homeless drug addict or stuck in a hospital or prison. Suicide is fighting against that destiny.

 

[leavingsoon99]

I think I'm suicidal because of the culmination of all of the events of a traumatic life. I think my destiny, had I done what life wanted me to do, was to be a convenient punching bag for my toxic family and a cuck boyfriend for some toxic female. I dared to alter that, and it seems like life is mad at me for that.

 

[SuicideDreams]

Yes, I know I must die by my own hands.

 

[voc_89]

i know it is coming for me one day. Its the only thing that gives me comfort and helps me through the day. That at any time I can end it all. Thus, I can put up with most of the nonsense I get faced with cause, when it gets too much, I can finally call it quits knowing that I tried my best in a game where I was dealt a bad hand since I was 13 (about 15 - 20 years ago)

 

[plurkid]

I've known since I was a kid. Back then I thought it was a bit of a sick joke. I'd make secret bets against myself and if id lose the Id die before I turned 18. I'm 25 now and as times gone by I'm more and more sure my fate is sealed... It's just a matter of when, where and how. Waiting for that moment when I've got nothing good left to experience. I'm getting close.

 

[Hugh Class]

People who are aware of their fate inevitably try to escape it.

Like a theme park ride, there's a predetermined course that can't be escaped. Their attempts to set a seemingly more beneficial course may muddle things even worse.

In Greek tragedy, characters' vain attempts to surmount the laws of fate only exacerbate their problem and bring about that which they so heartily tried avoid.

In any case, there is no escape—characters understand the inevitability of fate, and either must accept it or destroy the world around them trying to avoid it.

I have finally after a lifetime of struggle to avoid this fate.... i have finally accepted it...I now realize their nothing I can do to change it.