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tilsleepcomes

tilsleepcomes

Willing to try anything.
Jul 23, 2021
106
I try to distract myself. I am killing days until I am ready to CTB. I use shows and videos, but when my mind is idle, I go back to thoughts of CTB.

The only time I don't think about it as much is bed time. Sleep is like the oblivion I seek in CTB and I am happy for it. It ends the next morning unfortunately. Then I go back to either mindless distraction or thinking about CTB.
 
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O

outatime_85

Warlock
May 17, 2022
789
Do you still enjoy any part of your life? No.

I have to use different distractions to get through my days.

My nights are nothing but nightmares and disrupted sleep.

As for preparing, I am missing one item from my cash-out kit.

Other than that, when I want to go, I can just go.

If I can turn things around, great. If not, then I still have tools and knowledge to cash-out later.
 
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castler

castler

Enlightened
Jul 11, 2022
1,206
Really the only thing I look forward to each day is my music. Anything else don't matter to me.
 
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