Discussion Do you sometimes feel like you'll be seen as a loser if you ctb?

[sugarb]

Do you think what people will think about you after your death? lol

The following text is kinda messy... But I guess my main point is clear.

I mean, personally I understand that it's actually a win. But still, sometimes, I think like people who don't know my full story would pity me and assume that I couldn't endure some mental disorder and was always alone and bla bla bla. Not to disrespect anybody who suffers from it, I might have also had some of this issues, I just don't like the way some people percept the act of suicide. Regardless of what's the cause, I don't like the prospect of them suggesting things... Ultimately I understand that perhaps I'm not really suicidal if I'm bothered by this BS otherwise I wouldn't give a fuck. Or maybe I am and i just consciously acknowledge these absurd fears/thoughts that my mind is creating.

I can't open up fully about my problems to anybody in this world, so I don't want to tell anyone about it partially, because they wouldn't know the full story if i really do kms. That's why I kinda can't make a strong connections to people, because there's always a possibility of me killing myself, i don't want anybody to feel sad because of it and don't want them to know what actually happened and why i did that. So I'm kinda more calm when I isolated for a long period of time. This way the case of suicide will be really vague, because no one could say they talked to me lately

I don't believe I'd be seen as a loser since I don't associate with anyone who'd think of me like that (so far as I know) and as such those people probably wouldn't even be aware I died. I also don't really care.

 

[BardBarrie]

Let me tell you, I have — for roughly the past 20 years — stayed here against my will and as such am already a massive loser. I've been a loser all this time.

CTB'ing will at least fix that and give me some dignity.
The problem with me is that I've let the fear of dying keep me here, rotting away.
I need to overcome my fears and CTB, and I view that as an accomplishment instead of a failure.

If you want to live —> live.
If you don't want to live —> CTB.

 

[earshurt]

I'm already seen as an off-putting and mentally unwell, with no accomplishments to my name, so yeah I could totally see someone like my dad viewing me as a loser or failure for committing suicide. I bet he'd view it as me "giving up" on life like I gave up on so many other things.

Whatever, man. There is no way to look good while committing suicide. I may as well make my peace with that, should I ever choose to go through with it.

 

[msesis]

Do you think what people will think about you after your death? lol

The following text is kinda messy... But I guess my main point is clear.

I mean, personally I understand that it's actually a win. But still, sometimes, I think like people who don't know my full story would pity me and assume that I couldn't endure some mental disorder and was always alone and bla bla bla. Not to disrespect anybody who suffers from it, I might have also had some of this issues, I just don't like the way some people percept the act of suicide. Regardless of what's the cause, I don't like the prospect of them suggesting things... Ultimately I understand that perhaps I'm not really suicidal if I'm bothered by this BS otherwise I wouldn't give a fuck. Or maybe I am and i just consciously acknowledge these absurd fears/thoughts that my mind is creating.

I can't open up fully about my problems to anybody in this world, so I don't want to tell anyone about it partially, because they wouldn't know the full story if i really do kms. That's why I kinda can't make a strong connections to people, because there's always a possibility of me killing myself, i don't want anybody to feel sad because of it and don't want them to know what actually happened and why i did that. So I'm kinda more calm when I isolated for a long period of time. This way the case of suicide will be really vague, because no one could say they talked to me lately

I don't care haha! They won't understand and if they did I wouldn't be in this situation in the first place. And if I'm gone, they can all fuck off.

 

[abchia]

I'm already a loser. The only thing thatll change is I wont have to hear about it.

 

[Edpal247]

I will, but I will get over that - right?

 

[leaftomb]

i'm a loser already, that wouldn't change much. i guess maybe extended family members could think i'm weak or something, but i barely know them so nothing i can say for sure. i don't think people will think much about me after i die, except maybe for my parents, so.