Do you receive therapy?

[rxleep]

Are those of you who are planning to ctb currently in therapy? How about the ones who aren't planning to do anything right away? I'm curious to see if being in therapy is helping you or if you're still urgent to ctb. I've been in therapy for 8 years and she is amazing. I attempted once in that time frame though and ended up in ICU for a few days. She's moving to a different program soon and I can't be her patient anymore and I'm devastated. It's pathetic but I know I won't be able to cope without her support.

 

[FuneralCry]

No. I do not think any amount of therapy would help me. Therapy will not take away a horrible, empty existence. I think it is rational to want suicide in a life like mine.

 

[PeacefulTonic]

Nah there's no way therapy would help me. Everything is beyond unfixable

 

[FriendofDeath]

I, too, lost my therapist and so far I've driven to see her once, otherwise we do telephone appointments, mostly check-ups. I also lost my psychiatrist. She cried for me at our last appointment. They both really let me talk, including about suicide, without being shocked by what I shared with them. I think I was extremely lucky that they seemed to care. Figure I'm going to be lost while I figure out what to do next. Sometimes for me it's just getting from one breath to the next.

 

[A_miStake_of_NATURE]

It's very individual. I know few people who benefit from therapy. It really didn't help me personally,
it's great that she's been helping you so much, and I'm sorry she won't be able to be your therapist anymore…. Maybe she can refer you to someone she thinks is going to be good for you?

 

[arie]

Tried it for a few months but it didn't help me in the slightest. Only ended up with a bill on my doormat. Sorry to hear you can't see your therapist anymore, hope you find a different therapist who'll suit you just as well

 

[Sittichmutter]

Both my therapist and my Psychiastrit are helping me a lot. I wish I had started therapy years ago. It would have spare me a lot of suffering...

 

[rxleep]

It's very individual. I know few people who benefit from therapy. It really didn't help me personally,
it's great that she's been helping you so much, and I'm sorry she won't be able to be your therapist anymore…. Maybe she can refer you to someone she thinks is going to be good for you?

She wanted me to see someone else and do a transition period with her. I can't do it. I told her years ago that if this didn't work out with her then I was done. I couldn't keep starting over. At the time it wasn't questioned. I still feel the same way. I don't have it in me.

 

[A_miStake_of_NATURE]

She wanted me to see someone else and do a transition period with her. I can't do it. I told her years ago that if this didn't work out with her then I was done. I couldn't keep starting over. At the time it wasn't questioned. I still feel the same way. I don't have it in me.

I'm so sorry to hear that. So there isn't any way you could still be her patient??… what if that other therapist is going to be as good as her and you will really like them?? Can you at least try??

 

[rxleep]

I'm so sorry to hear that. So there isn't any way you could still be her patient??… what if that other therapist is going to be as good as her and you will really like them?? Can you at least try??

I can't continue seeing her because the program she is moving to is only for military veterans and so I don't qualify. I've begged managers to just let me continue my weekly appointments with her and they've said that it's not possible. I'm sure other therapists are good but I can't start over after all the time. I don't want to go through it all again and I don't want anybody else to know what I've been through. I don't trust people and I don't want to trust anybody. It took me 3 years of seeing my psychologist that is leaving to tell her anything truly personal. She knew I had c-ptsd before I did. I was just referred to her for anxiety and depression.

 

[A_miStake_of_NATURE]

I can't continue seeing her because the program she is moving to is only for military veterans and so I don't qualify. I've begged managers to just let me continue my weekly appointments with her and they've said that it's not possible. I'm sure other therapists are good but I can't start over after all the time. I don't want to go through it all again and I don't want anybody else to know what I've been through. I don't trust people and I don't want to trust anybody. It took me 3 years of seeing my psychologist that is leaving to tell her anything truly personal. She knew I had c-ptsd before I did. I was just referred to her for anxiety and depression.

I understand you not willing to start everything over…… Then what are you going to do?

 

[Jblack]

I stopped therapy sometime back. I got tired of the bullshit attitude and all the meds. Oh, the meds! Always another med, a new and different med. I felt like someone's lab rat. And the condescending advice and responses. What do you think this is happening to you? You need to understand the feelings of others. etc. Enough was enough.

 

[rxleep]

I understand you not willing to start everything over…… Then what are you going to do?

SN

 

[-FrozenRobot-]

I had to go through therapy after my attempt to CTB. At one point I shouted at my parents to leave me alone and that therapy isn't working for me. I'm still suicidal and my parents keep doing the same stuff that made me what I am now. There is no hope for me.
Sad truth is that therapy won't work for everyone.

 

[Sebuet]

Therapy in its current form is a commercial product
Therapy in its current form is a commercial product

I stopped therapy sometime back. I got tired of the bullshit attitude and all the meds. Oh, the meds! Always another med, a new and different med. I felt like someone's lab rat. And the condescending advice and responses. What do you think this is happening to you? You need to understand the feelings of others. etc. Enough was enough.

Ya I second this. Especially with the meds. Drug dealers aren't that pushy with what they sell

 

[Hurt]

I'm thinking in restarting therapy again since I found out that I'm too coward to ctb. But sitting in front on someone to talk and spend money is not something I really like but I don't know what else to do with my life. I'm stuck and my suicidal thoughts are eating me. I've been homealone many times and I didn't have the balls to do it. And I don't want to be stuck in this life. Everyone are moving forward and I'm always in the same place. I'm done with that. What's the point of living like this? If I choose to stay alive I should progress not been stuck in this state of mind forever. I don't know if I should quit this site if I restart therapy..

 

[Hateyouprolife]

Never been to one nor do I want. Why should I see therapist if my goal is to ctb? I see life as cat and mouse game where most of world is cat and me, the mouse wins when I manage to ctb.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

Eh, I had thought about it before, but, probably not a good idea for me. First off, any benefits I got from it if any at all would likely be pretty shirt term. Secondly, I have been doing the whole "couch therapist" thing for a long, long time now so it's likely I would end up steering the conversation towards them inadvertently. Did it before at the tender age of 15. Other than that, not comfortable talking with a stranger about intimate details of my mind in a clinical environment.

 

[Seafoam]

I see 2 therapists and they help me through the day to day stuff but I don't think they can help me long term.

 

[Crimsonghost3]

I don't believe in it. To me they aren't doing it because they care if I can't supply money they don't want to hear me which I get everyone needs to work but if I have no-one friends or family or people who should care about me that I can talk to and will be there no stranger that I have to pay is going to help me. If I won't tell the person I trust most things im not telling someone else shit. Plus all the people I know are always shuffling through different people and if im not telling one im sure was hell not telling multiple. I was on anti depressants at one point and I legit thought I was doing good and getting better so they let me stop taking them and then I realized I wasn't better it was the meds and that's so fake to me im not living my life on pills I need to take so otherwise I go right back to wanting to ctb so I just lived with it for years

 

[willitpass]

been in therapy since i was 6 had at least 12 therapists over the years. been inpatient, done intensive outpatients, done regular once a week therapy, done trauma focused therapy, had shock therapy, been on too many meds to count, been in a residential for 8 months. currently i'm in once a week regular therapy and i've given up on treatment. there are genuinely no more options i have no tried so i see no reason to be honest, all it will do is land me in the hospital again. so i'm just lying about being okay in each session

 

[Vex]

Are those of you who are planning to ctb currently in therapy? How about the ones who aren't planning to do anything right away? I'm curious to see if being in therapy is helping you or if you're still urgent to ctb. I've been in therapy for 8 years and she is amazing. I attempted once in that time frame though and ended up in ICU for a few days. She's moving to a different program soon and I can't be her patient anymore and I'm devastated. It's pathetic but I know I won't be able to cope without her support.

Therapy helps me. Being able to talk to someone on the outside looking in gives me valuable Insight about my issues.

I didn't realize how bad my mental health had deteriorated until I finally went back.

 

[LoveAndMonsters]

It didn't help. I just eventually stopped attending

 

[MindFog]

Yeah, I have before. The meds helped a bit but more on suppressing the depressive symptoms. The main issues on why I want to die was never addressed on any of my sessions.

It quickly turned into "buy these meds and get out" transactions so I stopped going. It didn't help that my psychiatrist hates me for being a NEET before. Made me wish I never opened up about that.

I don't want to give any more money to that guy honestly. Especially when everything was crazy expensive.

 

[lostinthebleak]

I've been seeing one for over a year and a half after losing my mom to an accident that left me with severe depression and ptsd. It hasn't done a lot for me and it only makes me wanna CTB either through a car wreck or CO

 

[YMN]

I got forced into seeing a therapist when I was 15 for about 2-3 months. And therapy didn't really do anything for me. None of my therapist's exercises or suggestions helped me in the long run. I remember she hyperfocused hard on my low self-esteem appearance wise, but didn't try to tackle my suicidal thoughts or self harm. I found out later from my mom that the therapist basically told her that nothing was wrong with me and it was just teen hormones. Which left a bad taste in my mouth about therapy.

 

[Dear Agony]

Yes, have been for 8 years. I hate it, but my parents force me into it if I want to continue living here.

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

I had somewhere in the range of 8-10 years of therapy. It started when I was around 10 and my primary school put me in a therapy group for troubled children after my father passed.

Out of all the therapies I tried, this one was probably the only one that offered a modicum of effectiveness simply because it provided an hour each week where I could escape from the isolation and bullying I dealt with in my classes.

However, the other children in my group were unhinged and one of them went and told the staff at school that we had a ctb pact (we didn't, I hardly even knew this girl and I had no contact with her outside of the group as per the rules. I wasn't actively contemplating suicide at this point either.)

So I was punished at home and no more group for me. Each subsequent therapist was even worse than the one that came before them. Worthless platitudes, gaslighting, "oh that sucks, just wait till you're 18", the same trite advice repeated over and over- gee, I had no idea I could try hobbies! What a novel suggestion therapist drone #3727!

As my problems grew more complex, therapists grew more useless. None of them have been able to offer me any sage wisdom or support. They aren't equipped with the tools to properly deal with complex ptsd, autism, chronic pain, estrangement, etc. Their words are as empty as your wallet after a session.

Yet everyone and their brother will tell you to "shop around" until you find the right one. I'm sorry, but no therapist exists who can fill the void left by having no family, a lifetime of isolation, being abused at every turn, rampant ostratisation, and physical pain that drives you mad.

I quit seeking out a therapist because I was getting nothing out of it besides a hemmorage of finances.