Discussion Do you long for companionship? A partner?

[LonelyPrince]

I find myself longing for someone to be there for me and hold me. Someone I could give all my love to and be reciprocated.
It's so lonely.
I won't ever try using dating apps because the people on there seem to just be looking for hookups. I want genuine connection.
I'm trying to move on from liking my friend since she is now in a relationship but it's so painful.

Does anyone else feel this void, this intense craving? Like anyone would do?

 

[dragonofenvy]

Yes, for the past several years. I used to deny to myself that I needed connection but I was very, very wrong. We're wired to crave it when we're alone. I'm not sure what to do about it because it is clear I am not a loveable person. I've tried in the past and there's only so many rejections you can take before you know that the truth is, you're fundamentally broken in some way that others can easily see. I'm not just talking about romantic relationships either, but friendships as well.

I think a lot of people don't fully grasp what the loneliness is like. For them, connection is taken for granted. It's something that comes and goes and can be thrown away because new ones are easy to make. I think you can only truly appreciate someone when you've been in solitude for so long.

 

[Forveleth]

Before I met my partner, I had actually started to enjoy the solitary life. While companionship is always nice, I had found the ability to go out and have meaningful experiences by myself. I debate on whether or not I would have stayed single my entire life.

If I could go back in time, I think I would not have minded being single but maybe I would have stuck with someone if the right person would have come along.

 

[Tautochrome]

No, but I feel for you

 

[meowpuppy]

i do yearn for a partner. somebody nice to hug and hold me while i'm lonely. somebody i can cherish with all the love that i've been bottling up,

 

[No-name]

Lonliness is my killer too

 

[Passenger4224]

I quite literally need a boyfriend/husband to be happy. Being stuck single forever is one of the biggest reasons I will die.

I still wouldn't settle with 'anyone'. Sadly I never find myself interested unless he's way above my league.

 

[Braindead Girl]

We live to yearn for another sadly

 

[plimeix]

Yes, but it's helpful that I'm anxiously avoidant and fear intimacy and vulnerability… so as much as I want a partner, there's this deep rooted fear of inadequacy that I'll ultimately disappoint the other person.

It took me some time but I have found a lot of meaning and comfort when I redirected that effort into instead nurturing my platonic relationships like caring for friends and animals. I know that's different from a companion or a partnership though.

 

[ConfusedClouds]

Every now and again I get strong waves of longing/yearning for 'something'. But I know its not viable/possible for me. I have hurt and upset too many good people in the past. I cannot be trusted nor relied on, I am hypocritical and uncommunicative and just create mess. Its not fair on others. I couldn't even maintain the 'relationship' with therapist with out freaking out and being a dickhead to her. I've relocated and ghosted everyone (family and friends) from past lives for nearly 4 years now and am avoiding allowing anything too close to develop where I am now. I shouldn't still be here but I'm stuck like many others in that void of not truly living and not actively dying.

 

[DeathJester]

Not able to long for anyone but the love of my life. I genuinely don't care about any other man, doubt I ever will. But he sadly thinks differently about that.

 

[anopenwound]

I used to. The thought of being close to anybody terrifies me now.

 

[kittygolem]

So much so, that I believe it's a little unhealthy at this point. I fantasize about love and about being loved, but long-term that never truly happens.

 

[DeathSweetDeath]

So I can abandon them when I CTB? No.

 

[HFK40000]

It's what I want more than anything.

 

[Kokonoe]

yes. a while back i came to the realization that what i really needed and never had in my life was companionship. i don't think it would be enough to save me anymore, though. but i want it so badly. coming home to an empty home is so upsetting every single time. going to bed alone is so upsetting. i just want someone i can share even the small moments of life with. it's hard having to live my whole life alone.