Do you lack motivation to even write a suicide note?

[exiled]

I have so many things I'd want to say or leave behind in some way.
But I feel like when I actually am ready to CTB I'm not going to have the motivation.
And I certainly don't have it now.


I'm sad that my words will never be spoken and I have no one to blame but me.

 

[lonelysadman89]

I'm not sure if this can help you, but maybe you can write your thoughts in your computer and then print them. I usually write a lot about my thoughts, sometimes this can worsen my mental state or can make it better.

If by any chance you think you can't, maybe you can start writing a list of the most important moments in your life, both great and bad. Try to send some very significant words to the ones around you because probably they're going to think very confused when they read the note.

I once wrote a suicide note that I still have saved in my computer... It's quite long and it's kind of an explanation about my life and how I couldn't express my emotions at the time. This was in 2015, yet I've been experiencing the same exact symptoms since then because I have chronic and major depression (currently taking medicines for it but I've tried a LOT of medicines but nothing works), and lately I feel that my life is going down slowly.

I hope you take the best decision for yourself. If you think there's a hope to get out of the hole, which is very difficult, try it, but if you don't, I guess the worst thing is the one who will see the scene and how aggresive it was.

My best wishes,

Lonelysadman89

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

I guess the best thing to do would be to keep the note short and simple, yet just write down what's most important when the time comes.
Mine basically states that its nobodys fault , and please be happy that I'm no longer suffering.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I suffer from lack of motivation for almost everything. I think in the worst case I have to leave without a suicide note bc I don't know what to say anyway.

 

[AnonymousL]

I suffer from lack of motivation for almost everything. I think in the worst case I have to leave without a suicide note bc I don't know what to say anyway.

I am not sure I'm gonna write full notes but I did leave a paper behind with the most 'important' things like

That if I become a vegetable they should pull the plug

 

[leavingsoon99]

No. I don't have anyone to write one to. No one is going to care that I'm gone. They'll probably even feel relieved or joyed by my passing. Even though I never did anything to them. Oh well. But, no, I would write one if there was someone to write one to.

 

[Oathkeeper]

I have a pretty extensive note, it's very long. I know there's no way to make my death easy on my loved ones, but at the very least, I want to leave them with as few questions as possible as to why I made that choice. Just so that nobody blames themself, or anybody else for that matter. Whenever the time comes, if it comes, I plan to just copy it into a text message and mass send it to everybody. Would hate to leave a physical note, only for law enforcement to hold onto it for ages for investigation purposes.

Ideally, I'd like to have smaller, individual notes as well, but I haven't found the motivation for that yet.

I really do think that many of the people on this site that aren't planning on leaving a note should reconsider, because I'm sure there is at least one person that would be hurt by their passing and want some sort of answer. But it's not my story to tell, and not my place to judge. Just my personal opinion.

 

[𝗟𝗼𝗻𝗲𝗹𝘆]

I wouldn't even know what to say tbh. There's so much to say but so much I would want to keep to myself. It's just confusing and hard.

 

[I Can't Say]

I'm sure there is at least one person that would be hurt by their passing and want some sort of answer.

God, my niece and nephew. But what could I even say to them? God.

Everyone else, fuck 'em. They had their chance.

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

No. I don't have anyone to write one to. No one is going to care that I'm gone. They'll probably even feel relieved or joyed by my passing. Even though I never did anything to them. Oh well. But, no, I would write one if there was someone to write one to.

We will care when you're gone.

 

[Oathkeeper]

God, my niece and nephew. But what could I even say to them? God.

Everyone else, fuck 'em. They had their chance.

I'm assuming they're pretty young? Maybe you can leave them something that they can read when they're older. Just to let them know you loved them.

Hope you either find the strength to keep fighting, or the strength to find the right words.

 

[NocturnILL]

At the actual moment of CTB I don't think I will write anything. If I don't do it before I don't see me having the energy to do so. I lose motivation every time I try because it is too hard. I breakdown and can't think. My intrusive thoughts get the best of me and I then I start to feel maybe it's best if I don't. If I never complete one I'd hope the people that do deserve my words know just how much they mattered and I'm ok now.

 

[meltskelt]

I have so many things I'd want to say or leave behind in some way.
But I feel like when I actually am ready to CTB I'm not going to have the motivation.
And I certainly don't have it now.


I'm sad that my words will never be spoken and I have no one to blame but me.

Yeah, everytime I tried writing my letter the lack of motivation made me stop and question " why are you even trying to die? It's useless trying to run away from pain". That's a real problem when deciding to CTB, having enougth motivation

 

[bunny:3]

Instead of notes, have you ever thought about messages? (to yourself ofc)

They're quick and convenient , they can be a peek into your situation and they don't have to be lengthy. Whenever I have some urge to CTB, I just message whatever pops up in my head, it can be a reason, a feeling, a thought, person...etc.... And I think most will look through those first after a successful attempt.

Hope this helps

 

[KillMeh]

Yeah idk what to say. Everything I try sounds stupid and tone deaf. I dont even care about people Im gonna leave behind at this point, funnily I only want to let it be known that I dont want a funeral. Thinking about writing a note makes me wanna kill myself because what I can offer in it is proof of how inhuman I am.

 

[voyager]

Have been writing a goodbye post and suicide note in my head for years, decades even. Always trying to find the right words, and whenever I do, I'd eventually forget them again. It's back and forth. Sometimes I intend to write one, then other times not. Some detailed, some brief. Sometimes written, sometimes printed. It's all so overwhelming. Wish one could just snap one's finger and everything would be fine for everyone involved.

Ironically, the only suicide note I ever wrote up was when I wasn't even suicidal, just having a bad day or something as a teen.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

I have 20 at the ready in envelopes and names and contact information.

They're all pretty generic and similar really "you meant so much to me" and "my life was so much better because you were in it".

I don't think I'm going to leave anything that gets into " reasons". It just reads as "I done had a sad* anyways.