Discussion Do you have less sympathy for self induced problems?

[Forever Sleep]

Both in yourself and, others?

I'm finding work very physically hard at the moment because I've let my fitness really drop. Plus, my diet has been poor so, I'm carrying too much weight. I know therefore, that I've brought my current predicament on myself.

I suppose, I have less sympathy for myself, because I know I've done it deliberately and, knowingly. Plus, if I'm less kind to myself, maybe I won't be stupid enough to do it again. (Although, I probably will...)

I also realise that my social anxiety would likey be huge now because I've been avoiding social situations for years.

I suppose there are still reasons behind us making unwise decisions. I can pity myself and others for the various crap that made us more likely to make poor decisions. Still, I can't truthfully say I've always done things to help myself.

What are your feelings? Do we always deserve sympathy? Even if we've screwed up?

 

[darksouls]

everyone deserves the same sympathy
it makes no difference for what reasons someone suffers
the suffering is not reduced if someone has caused it themselves

 

[Emerita]

I believe that acknowledging one's own mistakes and not blaming others is admirable. Though we can sometimes be too hard on ourselves and sometimes if not often we aren't fully to blame, there are outside factors out of our control, even if small. As an addict, I take full accountability for my choices, and while I don't like the decisions I've made, I don't seek sympathy for myself. What I do want is understanding, or at the very least, an acknowledgment that everyone has their own story, which we may not fully understand. People often judge others for perceived self-inflicted problems due to their own insecurities or a desire to feel superior or feeling it's unfair. Instead of sympathy, I think what truly matters is empathy. In some cases, sympathy can be appropriate, but many people actually prefer empathy over sympathy.