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GhostNote

Member
Aug 23, 2022
32
I have severe pain hyperacusis. I'm stuck in a room all day every day. Leaving the house poses the risk of worsening my condition when it's already at a severe life destroying level. So yes I am afraid to leave for this reason.
 
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D

Deleted member 31858

Guest
I have severe pain hyperacusis. I'm stuck in a room all day every day. Leaving the house poses the risk of worsening my condition when it's already at a severe life destroying level. So yes I am afraid to leave for this reason.
having hyperacusis combined with agoraphobia is the worst. I have both and I am locked up at home all day with noise :(
 
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R

Resinn66

Student
Sep 5, 2021
120
Yes, it happens every time I leave the house. It is like going to an alien world where I feel that all eyes are on me, judging every move I make, the clothes I wear and my physical appearance. A horrible feeling. Maybe it is the result of my paranoia 😔
 
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H

help56

Student
Oct 4, 2022
121
Yeah every time. I needed to go outside the last 3 days and man it was hard. 1. Getting up in the morning (nearly impossible) 2. Seeing all this people that can enjoy life 3. The crowds, sooo many people out there 4. Trying to get what I have to do like today I bought a new phone and man it was exhausting and I didn't even enjoy having a new phone.

Food I only order online and let it be delivered, I can't take it to be in a store for a longer time.
Exactly how I feel. I have to travel for work. I don't want to. I need the money so css add not resign
 
👁

👁️👃👁️

Enlightened
Aug 14, 2022
1,292
I never used to but around 11 months ago I developed agoraphobia pretty badly so yeah I don't really like going outside anymore
 
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emgrl

emgrl

Mage
Aug 6, 2022
575
I never used to but around 11 months ago I developed agoraphobia pretty badly so yeah I don't really like going outside anymore
Mine started about 2-3 months ago. My friends, family, and doctors all know I'm agoraphobic. Funny, my mother is the only one that makes me feel bad about it. If I could get out of my house, I would.
I actually had to physically go to a psychiatric appt yesterday, she prescribed me benzos, so by law I have to meet with her in person once a year (still don't know how that will keep people from getting addicted to them, but whatever).
I had to buy portable car battery charging cables for my car, because I had left it sitting there for so long without turning it on. It was completely dead… well, still is, I either need to get a new battery, or charge the thing before I want to go anywhere.
I never thought I'd be here in my life, yet here I am. Grateful for all of you… ♡
 
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👁

👁️👃👁️

Enlightened
Aug 14, 2022
1,292
Mine started about 2-3 months ago. My friends, family, and doctors all know I'm agoraphobic. Funny, my mother is the only one that makes me feel bad about it. If I could get out of my house, I would.
I actually had to physically go to a psychiatric appt yesterday, she prescribed me benzos, so by law I have to meet with her in person once a year (still don't know how that will keep people from getting addicted to them, but whatever).
I had to buy portable car battery charging cables for my car, because I had left it sitting there for so long without turning it on. It was completely dead… well, still is, I either need to get a new battery, or charge the thing before I want to go anywhere.
I never thought I'd be here in my life, yet here I am. Grateful for all of you… ♡
Much love and support em I'm sorry that you're having to go through such a challenging time right now and that your mom is treating you that way because of this just know that many of us are here for you and we understand what you're going through and there's no judgment at all. Much love. Grateful for you as well.
 
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emgrl

emgrl

Mage
Aug 6, 2022
575
Much love and support em I'm sorry that you're having to go through such a challenging time right now and that your mom is treating you that way because of this just know that many of us are here for you and we understand what you're going through and there's no judgment at all. Much love. Grateful for you as well.
Much love and support to you, too hun. Thank you all for being here for me, please know, I'm here for all of you, too. Judgement free zone here… Much Love to All of You ♡
 
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IntoTheLight

IntoTheLight

Member
Oct 11, 2022
46
Ever since my life went to shit, yes. I broke off contact to everyone I know and now I'm afraid to run into people that I know who live close by.
 
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makethepainstop

makethepainstop

Visionary
Sep 16, 2022
2,029
I cramp up everytime I'm outside, I can't even go for a walk into the forest with my dog and relax because of so many people, so I rather risk going for a walk at night even though I'm afraid some animal will attack me and one time I passed some gypsies and I'm glad nothing happened to me. One thing I gave up one is smiling though. All my life I've been listening to how I always look like I'm in a bad mood and I should smile more, I fucking hate it and I recently gave up on it. It's hard because I so want people to like me, especially men, but it feels so much better being relaxed even if I look like the most depressed or meanest person alive or whatever else people want to project on me.
Somebody buy this man a beer, stat! A few THC gummies wouldn't hurt him either.
 
nixxeekes

nixxeekes

Member
Jul 3, 2022
20
i have to inevitably go outside, and even if i recently have managed to put my anxieties under control, it still is scary. tiresome, too. i'm constantly very self-conscious, i can't even eat in front of others or grab something bc i believe someone might see the scars on my arms.

the one thing that is fucking me up too much lately is the thought of people talking about me behind my back. that has caused more and more stress each time i go out.
 
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S

SarRy

Student
Oct 5, 2022
193
From natural shyness to trauma responses. It can be very hard to be around people or unfamiliar surroundings. It is especially so when life has taught you that nowhere is safe.
 
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sleeps

sleeps

being a thing
Oct 12, 2022
69
when im feeling this bad it sucks to leave the house. i don't like being perceived by others, or seeing how much happier and well-adjusted most folks appear to be.

and god forbid anyone tries to talk to me. any attempt at conversation from my end comes across super awkward and distant. because my mind is barely there. its off somewhere else either thinking about all the reasons to ctb or fantasizing about doing it.
 
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M

MyFinalProject

Member
Oct 11, 2022
43
That's one of the reasons why I hate leaving the house, it seems like people are judging even the way I walk, it's disturbing.
 
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M

magnog

Member
Oct 10, 2022
8
Knowing people can do all sorts of things (including casually allowing extreme suffering) just so they can satiate desire through you can indeed be scary. But then I remember my body does the same thing to me on the regular--coercing me to feel awful if I don't eat or triggering negativity if my appearance doesn't align with what my mind envisions as "ideal".

Life is suffering and suffering is life-affirming, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised, though.
 
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S

SamTam33

Warlock
Oct 9, 2022
763
I peep out the windows before taking out the trash or going to the mailbox because I don't want to encounter anyone. Sometimes my next door neighbors will be outside and I can't tell. That's the worst! I literally want to run when I see them lol.

But on those rare days when I've covered all the scars just right, my body isn't detoxing from all the alcohol and I can leave the house - I'll have moments where I say to myself, "So this is what it feels like to be normal."

If I'm in a particularly good mood and can stand to listen to happy songs - I'll take the long way home. Reminiscing about times when I was content; when I looked forward to things... when I could actually ENJOY a meal.

But 99% of the time I'm in a rushed panic. Trying to get in and out as fast as possible. I have to drop off a package at the UPS store tomorrow and I've been distracted with the thought of having to leave my house all day.

The day before I have to leave is almost worse than actually leaving.
 
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Reactions: sleeps, toasterbath and emgrl
emgrl

emgrl

Mage
Aug 6, 2022
575
I peep out the windows before taking out the trash or going to the mailbox because I don't want to encounter anyone. Sometimes my next door neighbors will be outside and I can't tell. That's the worst! I literally want to run when I see them lol.

But on those rare days when I've covered all the scars just right, my body isn't detoxing from all the alcohol and I can leave the house - I'll have moments where I say to myself, "So this is what it feels like to be normal."

If I'm in a particularly good mood and can stand to listen to happy songs - I'll take the long way home. Reminiscing about times when I was content; when I looked forward to things... when I could actually ENJOY a meal.

But 99% of the time I'm in a rushed panic. Trying to get in and out as fast as possible. I have to drop off a package at the UPS store tomorrow and I've been distracted with the thought of having to leave my house all day.

The day before I have to leave is almost worse than actually leaving.
I know what you mean. That anticipation, it builds up. I had a similar experience this week, I Had to physically go to a doctor appt (I've been using zoom, bc of my agoraphobia), the day before was way worse than the actual day.
All the thoughts and worries, it's so overwhelming. I'm here for you today, if you need it… I know how hard it is ♡
 
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NeverEndingPain

NeverEndingPain

So tired of struggling
May 8, 2022
286
I don't even get dressed anymore. I forget what a bra and fitting clothes even feel like. I stay in a nightshirt all the time. I have a few that I just keep washing and changing. I spend most of my time in bed in a state of panic. I have a hard time to even leave my room. Barely eating. Barely surviving. I live alone and haven't talked in person to another human in so long 😭
I don't go past my front door. I just peek out my bedroom window and feel like some weirdo.
 
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