Do you ever wish for different parents?

[radar311]

Hello! Sorry for my grammar mistakes, english is my second language.

Like the title says, do you ever wish that someone else was your parent? Somehow it feels humiliating for me to even think about that.
It's just that I come from abusive household. My dad was abusive, rarely mom too. My dad died when I was 12, probably from suicide, but that's another story.
I am in psych ward right now and my mom hates it. I am grown up now and she literally says that i am imagining most things. And week ago she said things that made me so suicidal. If I wasn't already here in mental hospital, I would be dead right now for sure. And then the next second she said she loves me. What the hell? She just dont know (or dont even want to know) anything from mental health.

It just hurts me. Why was I raised like that? Why didn't i never had parents, who cared about me and who didn'nt hit me or abused me verbally? Or at least let me have that safe space at home, where i could talk about abuse, that happened in school and other places? Why didn't i get to have warm food every day? I wish i grew up in different family i guess.. or at least died very young..

Anyone else thinking that?

 

[Macedonian1987]

Yes I often wish for more compassionate, warmer and more loving parents. My grandmother who sadly passed away more than 20 years ago was the closest I have ever had to perfect parent. She was so caring, warm, comforting and full of unconditional love. Too bad she passed away when I was so young. I miss her almost every day after all these years.

 

[Quietist]

I'm sure everyone who has abusive or emotionally absent parents wishes they had loving, empathetic, supportive ones.

 

[PanaxMan]

Hello! Sorry for my grammar mistakes, english is my second language.

Like the title says, do you ever wish that someone else was your parent? Somehow it feels humiliating for me to even think about that.
It's just that I come from abusive household. My dad was abusive, rarely mom too. My dad died when I was 12, probably from suicide, but that's another story.
I am in psych ward right now and my mom hates it. I am grown up now and she literally says that i am imagining most things. And week ago she said things that made me so suicidal. If I wasn't already here in mental hospital, I would be dead right now for sure. And then the next second she said she loves me. What the hell? She just dont know (or dont even want to know) anything from mental health.

It just hurts me. Why was I raised like that? Why didn't i never had parents, who cared about me and who didn'nt hit me or abused me verbally? Or at least let me have that safe space at home, where i could talk about abuse, that happened in school and other places? Why didn't i get to have warm food every day? I wish i grew up in different family i guess.. or at least died very young..

Anyone else thinking that?

Sure. I would've wanted poorer parents with a stronger else for their children instead of them relying on blackmail to chain their fiction "fake rich and upper class" status. And I've told them this too and due to their blackmail I'm currently homeless

 

[Bitterly_Nostalgic]

My father is wonderful, loving and supportive and I wouldn't trade him for someone else as a parent for the world.

My mother was... well, she did actually love me, I'll give her that much. That's all I can give her. But a parent needs to offer more than love alone, and she wasn't a very good parent otherwise. She knew about my mental health issues and self harm when I was a teenager and did nothing about it. She witnessed one of my sobbing breakdowns that ended with me biting the hell out of my own arm and did nothing. She called it teen angst and thought I would just grow out of it. She was also very unaccepting when I came out to her as transgender and said a number of terrible things about it. Overall she was also an emotionally immature person who probably shouldn't have been a parent. I would have preferred a different mother. Maybe my life would have gone better if I had gotten help at an earlier age and the initial acceptance I needed.

 

[Forveleth]

All. The. Time.

I am here partially because of them.

 

[Bishop]

Yes 200%. Have a narcissist father. That the only wish I more than me not existing, is he not existing.

 

[DownwardSpiral]

every day