Do you ever say "I am going to kill myself" out loud.

[- V -]

The few times I told anyone about it, it made me give up.
It may be good when you know it's not the time (I put my affairs in order before leaving) but it can be dangerous if someone alerts the authorities
Today I keep my voices in my head just for me. I don't want to take any additional risks.

 

[Wait-Bus]

Out loud? Maybe...

In my head, all the time. In fact there was a year where I don't think I missed a day of saying it to myself.

It's negative thought looping.

I can't tell you what will help you. But for me, it helped to think about my thinking. Meaning, when you say or think these things ask yourself "Why am I saying this? What meaning does this have? How does this benefit me"

If the answer is no, it does not benefit me, then it gives you validation immediately to discredit/devalue the negative thought. OVer time, this will lessen the negative thought looping as you start to intuitively avoid meaningless/unhelpful thought processes.

Thank you for your thoughts - they are quite helpful

 

[Chronicoverwhelm]

Quite often when I'm alone throughout the day I say "I don't want to be alive" out loud, or "it's time for me to go". In my sleep it's a loop that plays over and over in my head sometimes. It's the first thing I think when I wake up in the morning.

 

[Green Destiny]

I don't say "I will kill myself" per se, I usually say "I did not ask for this life", "I did not ask to be here" or "I did not ask for this existence." All along the lines of saying I did not ask to be born into this messed up world.

 

[ctrl-alt-relief]

Really it has become involuntary at this point, say it everyday on my drive home from work.

 

[No_Lxve]

I usually say, "I can't wait to kill myself."

or

"Fuck my life" a lot. not in an edgy way

or

"I can't wait till I die."

 

[HadItAll]

I do, every day at this point.

 

[00nobody00]

I repeat it to myself when I have panic attacks. Especially when I wake up every day when reality hits me.

 

[52yoandmiserable]

Even though I don't have access, and thanks to previous run ins with "professionals",I probably never will, I must say out loud several times a day, "I should just put a bullet through my brain. "

 

[dwindlingfirst]

Every time I do that - I feel I am a bit closer - it feels like a reality and I won't be here much longer

I constantly tell myself to kill myself, idk why but I just do

 

[WorthlessCoward]

Oh yeah, all the time. My mom just looks at me with a deadpan expressions then turns around and leaves and my psychiatrist just looks at me with amusement

I thnk they both know I'm too much of a pussy to do it. BUT I'LL SHOW THEM ALL, unless I get yellow bellie'd again

 

[annxietty]

When I talk with myself out loud I say it quite a lot but never in front of anyone.

 

[Dark shadow]

Happens all the time. At completely random moments my brain goes "I want to die" and I usually end up saying it out loud.

 

[enough of this]

No. That would make things worse. My counselor has advised me to never say that to her, as she is legally mandated to turn me over to particular authorities if I say that. Once in their hands, I'll be put in some ward and given drugs until they're convinced I'm no "danger" to myself. I would never be released, and that would be so much worse than death.

 

[leavingsoon99]

I wake up every morning saying this.

 

[aesoppo]

Not necessarily out loud. I think about it quite a lot, however. There is a great line from a song that I think can reflect how I view it as cringe as that might sounds.

"Do you dream at night of thoughts inside you'll never tell no one, unless you find some way to mask them in some sarcastic pun"

I don't think anyone really knows that I think about it everyday. I tend to hide it extraordinarily well so most people I interact with view it as just dark humor.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I once said that out loud when I visited my mum, years ago. It came more out of the situation at that time and wasn't a serious issue unlike now. And that wasn't a good idea at all.

 

[brokeandbroken]

Every time I do that - I feel I am a bit closer - it feels like a reality and I won't be here much longer

I wish that was all it took. I'm so unbelievably ready to be dead and for this to be over.

 

[NoReasonToLive2023]

I say it to myself regularly, never around anyone, because they'd try and figure out when and where I intend to CTB.

I've even made up some basic poetry about it.

 

[90starve]

i say this way too often, for the smallest things

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

I used to say that when I was so stressed (after some traumatic events) but now I keep it to myself… I will never mention my plan to commit suicide out loud to anyone like that.