Discussion Do you believe Romantic love exist

[efil27]

i want to discuss this because it is one of the top reasons people give to continue living I got to the point where i believe romantic love is lust wrapped up as love that disappears after some years I think the only kind of love( maybe genuine care)that exist is biological ie what biological parents and their offspring which itself is shaky as I have heard countless stories of abuse and neglect i know their is kindness and sympathy and altruism like foster parents bond between brothers and sisters and friends which is also shaky as there are countless stories of abuse and betrayal but i want to talk specifically about romantic love a kind of love for a stranger that you can stand with him or her in his or her most difficult situations and can share everything and don't need to hide anything
I like to hear to thoughts and if you have your story or someone story to store why it or it doesn't exist I will very grateful

 

[darksouls]

I am mentally and emotionally too broken for a romantic relationship
I have never experienced anything like this

 

[enjoytheride]

Same here - feeling too exhausted. Love seems too far to reach. But I like comparing love to gold. There's fool's gold, plenty of it out there. True gold is relatively rare. So I believe that true love exists and I have seen a few couples that seem to have it (especially older couples). But being rare, one must look and work really hard to find it. Or then just have good luck.

 

[Kali_Yuga13]

Romantic love is a temporary condition. Sparks fly, there's chemistry and partners see each other with a halo. When that fades true love is tested through sacrifice and acts of devotion. Love is not words, promises or merely a feeing, love is measured through actions.

 

[WatchmeBurn]

I mean everything is biological in a way because, at the end of the day, we're just bags of meat with electricity running through them. That doesn't degrade the importance or emotional legitimacy of the feelings.

But I don't think it's inevitable at all that love or even intense attraction dies out and is replaced by a more platonic 'care'. I've been lucky enough to be in a relationship for 5.5 years and I am still immensely attracted to my girlfriend + I love her more now than I did when I first met her. I'm sure it happens to some relationships, but it's not an intrinsic feature of the emotions.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

i believe romantic love is lust wrapped up as love

Lust and love are not the same thing from a neurobiological standpoint and, while they can sometimes be intertwined, they can occur independently of one another. Lust tends to mainly activate the parts of the brain having to do with pleasurable activities while love activates broader regions. Romantic love involves the release of vasopressin and oxytocin, while lust mainly involves the release of estrogen and testosterone. We can also see this difference between the two when looking at the insula, as love tends to activate the anterior insula and lust tends to cause increased activity in the posterior insula. Romantic love is also thought to have potentially come about through co-opting mother-infant bonding mechanisms.

Romantic love and lust are considered to be distinct on a neurobiological level. Along with that, what you are suggesting also doesn't take into consideration the fact that there are many out there who have a very low sex drive but who are still able to experience romantic love.


I don't get why people see this as a topic even worth debating. Love is about as real as any other emotion. Not believing in it doesn't make you some kind of intellectual or something.

 

[Dejected 55]

I always wanted to believe in true love... even if it was rare. I no longer believe in anything anymore.

 

[just a bird]

I loved (still love) someone to the point where thinking about them hurts. Love exists, and I currently hate it.

 

[divinemistress36]

Yes, but I think its rare

 

[John-Doe]

I loved (still love) someone to the point where thinking about them hurts. Love exists, and I currently hate it.

it can be the greatest source of either pleasure or pain in life, sometimes it seems like both at the same time. i usually experience it as the latter, i know what you mean about hating love