Venting Desperately lonely

[lostintheloop]

I'm not alone, I'm lucky I guess, but I feel so lonely. I live with my parents but they don't know who I really am and they don't notice I'm drowning. They'll make things worse if I talk to them. I've cut off all my friends for their own safety but it's still hard. I'm unemployed and have no hobbies so never meet people.
The voices in my head are the only people I can trust. But they're aggressive and not there all the time. Sometimes I miss just chatting with friends but it's too dangerous.
I know impulsive ctb is bad idea but life is getting so unbearable that I just want to run away and do it asap. I know it's more likely to fail so trying not to.

 

[iloverachel]

I am so sorry you are so alone and suicidal my friend

 

[xinino]

Interesting

 

[lostintheloop]

Interesting

Glad you find my suffering interesting… care to elaborate ?

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry you suffer so much in this cruel existence, I understand that loneliness is painful for many. But anyway best wishes.

 

[AnxietyHangover]

I can relate with the feeling of loneliness. It's my worst enemy. No IRL friends, no partner, nothing. Just solitude. It eats away at my mind every day.

 

[lostintheloop]

I can relate with the feeling of loneliness. It's my worst enemy. No IRL friends, no partner, nothing. Just solitude. It eats away at my mind every day.

So sorry you can relate It makes everything so much harder in life

 

[xinino]

Glad you find my suffering interesting… care to elaborate ?

"The voices in my head are the only people I can trust. But they're aggressive and not there all the time" I just relate to this, but for me it's not voices but kinda subconscious exciting impulsive moments. Moreover my subconscious deeply got effected and shaped by real life antisocial figures both rationally and emotionally, I wonder who are those people in your mind? Are they real or fictional characters? or are you just talking to yourself?

 

[lostintheloop]

"The voices in my head are the only people I can trust. But they're aggressive and not there all the time" I just relate to this, but for me it's not voices but kinda subconscious exciting impulsive moments. Moreover my subconscious deeply got effected and shaped by real life antisocial figures both rationally and emotionally, I wonder who are those people in your mind? Are they real or fictional characters? or are you just talking to yourself?

Ah ok. Sorry you can relate to some of it and it sounds like you've been through difficult experiences that led to that. It's not real people, just wasn't sure how else to describe. But there's been something /someone real controlling my mind and the voices are part of that. They're definitely not my voice as they sound different, use different words and tell me to do things that I'd never want to do.

 

[ADHDloser]

I'm not alone, I'm lucky I guess, but I feel so lonely. I live with my parents but they don't know who I really am and they don't notice I'm drowning. They'll make things worse if I talk to them. I've cut off all my friends for their own safety but it's still hard. I'm unemployed and have no hobbies so never meet people.
The voices in my head are the only people I can trust. But they're aggressive and not there all the time. Sometimes I miss just chatting with friends but it's too dangerous.
I know impulsive ctb is bad idea but life is getting so unbearable that I just want to run away and do it asap. I know it's more likely to fail so trying not to.

I feel you, man. It is the worst. Mental agony kills me. I don't work at the moment and feel isolated from everyone else. No one to talk to and hug. Just empty. I wish I could have a gun so that I could shoot my brains out. I wouldn't wish this agony on my worst enemy. All I can say is that I somewhat understand.

 

[lostintheloop]

I feel you, man. It is the worst. Mental agony kills me. I don't work at the moment and feel isolated from everyone else. No one to talk to and hug. Just empty. I wish I could have a gun so that I could shoot my brains out. I wouldn't wish this agony on my worst enemy. All I can say is that I somewhat understand.

I'm so sorry you can relate. I don't have ADHD but i'm autistic and I know being neurodivergent can make everything so much harder and isolating . Really wish I could get a gun too.
I hope you find some peace in some way