Archness
Defective Personel
- Jan 20, 2023
- 490
My brain rly doesn't work.
Sometimes, suddenly, it'd be like... A shot of brain-chemestry was blasted into my brain. I somewhat lose awareness and make weird movements, not a complete loss of control, but it feels like I'm in the stars or something. Browsing here and feeling sad/depressed and suddenly *bam*, I feel fine and a bit relived, my emotional state suddenly zeroed. Sometimes tho I enter a spiral of suicidal and black pilled thoughts.
Tbh all this defectiveness with my own emotions is causing me to disassociate with those sensations a bit. I don't rly understand, well, defect-autist-neuron-sponge at it again. Don't worry, it's not like that all the time. and right now I'm feeling fine, my emotional state was zeroed, tho it's wearing off now.
Well I'm in a "good ambient mood" so most of these shots are positive. But when I'm in a "bad ambient mood" they're mostly negative ofc. Weird mood swings.
Sometimes, suddenly, it'd be like... A shot of brain-chemestry was blasted into my brain. I somewhat lose awareness and make weird movements, not a complete loss of control, but it feels like I'm in the stars or something. Browsing here and feeling sad/depressed and suddenly *bam*, I feel fine and a bit relived, my emotional state suddenly zeroed. Sometimes tho I enter a spiral of suicidal and black pilled thoughts.
Tbh all this defectiveness with my own emotions is causing me to disassociate with those sensations a bit. I don't rly understand, well, defect-autist-neuron-sponge at it again. Don't worry, it's not like that all the time. and right now I'm feeling fine, my emotional state was zeroed, tho it's wearing off now.
Well I'm in a "good ambient mood" so most of these shots are positive. But when I'm in a "bad ambient mood" they're mostly negative ofc. Weird mood swings.
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