
jimmy7754
I just want to be myself again
- Dec 15, 2021
- 508
I sometimes have this daily thought that comes around mid late afternoon when my panic attacks and anxiety have calmed down a bit.. it's this feeling of clarity over my constant overthinking of how bad things are getting for me.. once I feel it.. I have this rush and feeling that I shouldn't be scared to die at all.. that this made up suffering of consciousness moving through my life here will end and it's okay to want it to end.. there shouldn't be anything to worry about in death... I've had enough of it and there's nothing to fear.. it will be my perfect escape... but then I come back to my anxiety ridden feelings and panic where my survival instincts come in and I need to find something to eat and realize how hard difficult it is for me to die.. and I get back to where I was.