Venting CTB sadness

[sifp]

Anyone else here feel this sense of extreme tragedy and sadness as you wait for your mats to arrive to CTB? Just thinking about how things could've been different. About being cursed with a sick brain. About all of the people that will be traumatized by your being gone? It's a grief that I don't think I can fully even feel it's so heavy. Especially when sourcing things like meto and sn can takes weeks to months it's a long tIke for it to sink in.

 

[3rdworldsadness]

Yes I do. But it's my decision too. I can have peace with death and i can have the freedom I wanted...