burdenox
“You are all the things that are wrong with you”
- Nov 10, 2020
- 28
The only thing that's really keeping me here is other people. I don't have any other option but to live right now My family is dropping like flies so with all the grief I morally can't add to that… unless
All my methods are very obviously suicide. I'm wondering if there's a way to ctb that might make it look like an accident.
I thought about maybe vehicle accident but of course there's a risk of hurting others there. Maybe an "accidental" fall but that seems to obvious.
I really don't think I'll make anything of my life once I leave uni and I can't cope with the existential dread and constant feeling creeping doom that keeps increasing every day. Throwing myself into the dreary life of endlessly looping minimum wage jobs, sanitising myself entirely to be able to get a job, just about being able to pay rent and food, holding out for the next fun event happening in 5 months that will become less and less frequent after leaving uni and loosing all my uni friends. Everyday waiting for the next member of my family to die. It's a living nightmare and I can't do it.
In my view, I've got just over a year of freedom.
Anyone have any ideas?
All my methods are very obviously suicide. I'm wondering if there's a way to ctb that might make it look like an accident.
I thought about maybe vehicle accident but of course there's a risk of hurting others there. Maybe an "accidental" fall but that seems to obvious.
I really don't think I'll make anything of my life once I leave uni and I can't cope with the existential dread and constant feeling creeping doom that keeps increasing every day. Throwing myself into the dreary life of endlessly looping minimum wage jobs, sanitising myself entirely to be able to get a job, just about being able to pay rent and food, holding out for the next fun event happening in 5 months that will become less and less frequent after leaving uni and loosing all my uni friends. Everyday waiting for the next member of my family to die. It's a living nightmare and I can't do it.
In my view, I've got just over a year of freedom.
Anyone have any ideas?