Games Corrupt-A-Wish.

[epic]

I wish I was that naked old man.

I am a dude, I am pretty sure you don't want that.

 

[artificialpasta]

Granted, but now everyone has to worry about human poop falling on them from time to time.

I wish my car could fly over traffic.

Granted, but it gets shot down by the Air Force.

I wish for a cat.

 

[Deleted member 19654]

Granted but you get the most annoying cat in the world with the smelliest farts.

I wish I was pretty.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Granted, but you won't be able to see any changes in your appearance at all.

I wish I wasn't fat.

 

[Antigonish]

Granted, but you'll be nearly anorexic, and won't be able to gain weight. Just lose it, only weighing at max 75lbs.

I wish I could disappear

 

[Soul]

Granted! You become invisible, inaudible, nontactile, tasteless and smell-free. No one can interact with you, and vice versa.

I wish people were kind and generous.

 

[woxihuanni]

Granted, but they are stupid, indoctrinated and delusional so they ruin everybody's life.

I wish the Abomination's control over my husband was broken.

 

[Deleted member 19654]

Granted but another abomination comes along and takes her place.

I wish I wasn't lactose intolerant

 

[woxihuanni]

Granted, but now you believe you are a cow.

I wish the new abomination to get dementia.

 

[WrongGuy]

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[Soul]

I wish the new abomination to get dementia.

Granted. The original gets it too, with chronic incontinence as a bonus.

I wish any further abomination-wannabes would shrivel up uselessly before they're born.

 

[woxihuanni]

Granted, and their parents get an itch in the ear

Wishes that dragons are real

 

[Soul]

Wishes that dragons are real

Granted! And as their wisher-into-reality, you have a special relationship with them: They love and protect you, and go out of their way to entertain you.

I wish my sister knew how to cook, and enjoyed it.

 

[woxihuanni]

Granted, as a bonue, she knows all my recipes!

I wish I had a witch's garden

 

[Deleted member 19654]

Granted but your gardening skills are absolutely terrible and everything dies.

I wish that I am loved by all cats.

 

[woxihuanni]

Granted but you are allergic and phobic

Wish the sun would come out

 

[Deleted member 19654]

Granted. The sun comes out but the temperature becomes 60C.

I wish all my problems would go away.

 

[woxihuanni]

Granted, but you get the hives

I wish an asteroid makes a close passage tonight

 

[Ghost2211]

Granted, but Aliens were riding on it and they jumped off onto the earth, and made humanity into sex slaves.

I wish loneliness wasn't a sensation humans could feel.

 

[woxihuanni]

Yaayy for alien sex!

Granted, but we have a slight itch on the palm of the hand instead. Plus, who can be lonely when alien sex slave

I wish I had smoking papers

 

[epic]

Granted, but Aliens were riding on it and they jumped off onto the earth, and made humanity into sex slaves.

I won't mind if the alien lady is hot.

 

[Symbiote]

Granted. But in her alien world, men are penetrated instead.

I wish that I was an alien

 

[Ghost2211]

Granted, but then you discover that humans are in fact the aliens of this planet.

I wish I had perfect health

 

[woxihuanni]

Granted, but your ears grow slightly larger

I wish there was a powercut

 

[Soul]

Granted, but your TV stays on and emits nothing but old, really scary episodes of the Twilight Zone!

I wish I didn't feel like weeping.

 

[woxihuanni]

Granted, but now you are so happy your belly aches from laughing.

Wishes there was a rumbly but harmless earthquake

 

[Symbiote]

Granted. But my fat ass falls to the ground

I wish the earth swallowed me whole.

 

[woxihuanni]

Granted, but it took no meto so...

Wishes my nose was upturned

 

[Deleted member 14573]

Granted, but it's upturned all the way so your nostrils face the sky.

I wish I could sing well.

 

[woxihuanni]

Granted, but you are not allowed to sing.

I wish to meet the man on the moon