Chronic illness and death by a thousand cuts

[ChiseHatori]

I have chronic conditions, but nothing deadly. Just long term pain that makes the majority of my days a slog to get through.

Quite honestly, besides limiting my mobility, the pain itself isn't typically that bad, it's more on the annoying side most days. But that's where the "thousand cuts" mindset is coming from. You know how it sucks when you have the flu or a cold, right? For me, it's kinda like I have a permanent cold, some days the flu.

It just isn't pleasant to live this way - even if it isn't the severe pain I have seen many loved ones go through daily. It's just this, coupled with poor healthcare systems, mental and physical, that just make it extremely difficult to cope.

Tired of these aches, I just want some peace. But it feels especially selfish when the pain isn't typically severe. It really sucks.

I don't believe in people having "more valid" reasons to want to CTB. I really only apply this logic to myself because I fucking hate me.

I doubt I'm alone in this.

 

[U. A.]

I doubt I'm alone in this.

There's a chronic illness megathread somewhere and the whole gamut of ailments is in there.
and nah, wanting to die is wanting to die. When the cause is your body (that inescapable thing) and the oppression of the medical industry, that's doubly valid.