Catching fleeting hope

[AmanSilvers]

In the past couple months I have been going to therapy. Someone I live with commented that they can see I've improved already, but they will see what they want to. I have always kept the worst of it close to my chest.
I am catching butterflies of hope, but they don't last long. Maybe I need to learn to tend them better.
I am in a time of transition, I think. I hope? I hope one moment and return to pessimism the next. Either this path leads toward a life worth living or a grave with fewer doubts.
This little rock we live on seems to be accelerating itself toward annihilation, and I don't know if I can make peace with that. I don't know if my own damn therapist can make peace with that. But I've doubled my reasons to live, a glorious two item list that is somehow winning out against the seemingly infinite list of reasons to die sooner than later.
Now I have found the hope that will wane in moments. It's enough for now, and I'll just have to look for more later.

Do you have hopes? I am learning to appreciate even the tiniest ones, please tell me.

 

[girl_with_a_plan]

Music gives me hope - there's always something new to listen too, and I want to learn music production and DJing!

 

[apearl]

It's always so nice to see posts like this on SaSu: :) I'm glad that your life has taken a good turn like this!!

I am in a time of transition, I think. I hope? I hope one moment and return to pessimism the next. Either this path leads toward a life worth living or a grave with fewer doubts.

Pls remember that recovery is more then positive progression, there might be some moments u have where the pessimism clouds your brain but that doesn't wash away the fact that you and the people around u are noticing a change. And maybe with more time they'll fade away more.

Also saiki k pfp hell yeah

 

[AmanSilvers]

Music gives me hope - there's always something new to listen too, and I want to learn music production and DJing!

Ah I took a music production class in college and it was really cool. Highly recommend taking an in person class if you can. I learned a lot with the equipment and talking with other people. Though I am sure you could learn a lot with just a computer and some free vids.
Good luck :)

Pls remember that recovery is more then positive progression

Thank you for the reminder. I was writing in a moment where it was very tough to keep that in mind. Though I think I managed to more or less. It used to be that in a time like that I would hurt myself and then spend at least a few days sulking. But today is a fine day thankfully.

Also saiki k pfp hell yeah

I love when people recognize him :)