Bpd and split personality

[Life_and_Death]

I don't want to say anything. I'm scared of being told I dont, but something is off.
I have bpd (borderline personality disorder). To put simply it's defined as having emotional extremes with no center. For the longest while I figured it was my bpd, but the line has become more refined. I think I have 2 personalities.
One is very hateful. She feels the human race should burn. She wants to get wasted, have s*x and not care or worry about anything. She also swears a lot.
I also have another personality (me). I'm sweet, caring. Would help anyone anyway I can. I don't swear. I want to be happy and settle down, get clean.

It feels crazy. It sounds crazy.

 

[timf]

Without auditory hallucinations, classical schizophrenia might not be diagnose-able. However, split personality can also arise if a person has an intense desire to be good but recognize their "inner demons". It can be a survival tactic to see oneself as two personalities. However, as a coping strategy, this can cause problems in the long term.

We are never as good as we might like to be. Usually we are able to talk ourselves out of the bad things that might have a transient appeal, usually because we can see dark consequences. It might be helpful to reintegrate yourself

 

[TheLastFemaphrodyke]

I don't want to say anything. I'm scared of being told I dont, but something is off.
I have bpd (borderline personality disorder). To put simply it's defined as having emotional extremes with no center. For the longest while I figured it was my bpd, but the line has become more refined. I think I have 2 personalities.
One is very hateful. She feels the human race should burn. She wants to get wasted, have s*x and not care or worry about anything. She also swears a lot.
I also have another personality (me). I'm sweet, caring. Would help anyone anyway I can. I don't swear. I want to be happy and settle down, get clean.

It feels crazy. It sounds crazy.

is it YOU that wants to settle down and get clean, or is it what others in your life expect of you? There is nothing wrong with self medicating and if you do not want to be 'settled down' then why should you? Travel, date openly, try different careers, try different hair styles, clothing styles, who cares, it is YOUR life, not anyone elses, and if someone else is caring how you live your life, that sounds a little like controlling, and alot like micro agressions. It is hard to not hate, and be hateful towards, people that are not accepting you as you are, warts, scars and all; and you can pretend to like and be nice to them as they treat you poorly, for only so long until their unacceptance of you, finally makes you realize just how hateful and nasty these people really are. You may not be able to communicate, or even understand yourself what is going on at the time, those micro aggressions towards you, towards those others like you, they add up and soon you burst. That is what happens to me, especially when I start seeing the micro aggressions towards me and others I identify with and I try to explain exactly how, what they are doing or saying, is making me feel and I am then further made to feel that if I was just a better person, then those things would not bother me.....this is their circular reasoning, here, let me cut you with this knife and then I am going to slap you for bleeding

 

[rationaltake]

It's truly not crazy. I have several different personalities.

You experience it your own way and so do I. All sorts of conditions and states overlap.

It does seem strange but quite a lot of people experience it.

I think it takes a while to get used to the idea.

 

[noaccount]

There's nothing about swearing and having sex that's inherently *opposed to* being sweet and caring, though when drinking is involved with sex that can definitely make it more likely that you won't feel happy or safe about the situation.

Internal Family Systems might be good for letting personality "parts" talk to each other more and dialogue better - there are some guides and example exercises available for free online if you search.

 

[Life_and_Death]

However, split personality can also arise if a person has an intense desire to be good but recognize their "inner demons". It can be a survival tactic to see oneself as two personalities. However, as a coping strategy, this can cause problems in the long term.

Totally possible. I figured it either became more clear over the years or basically like you said, they don't like each other so they argue instead of hang out lol

I don't want to say anything. I'm scared of being told I dont

is it YOU that wants to settle down and get clean, or is it what others in your life expect of you? There is nothing wrong with self medicating and if you do not want to be 'settled down' then why should you? Travel, date openly, try different careers, try different hair styles, clothing styles, who cares, it is YOUR life, not anyone elses, and if someone else is caring how you live your life, that sounds a little like controlling, and alot like micro agressions. It is hard to not hate, and be hateful towards, people that are not accepting you as you are, warts, scars and all; and you can pretend to like and be nice to them as they treat you poorly, for only so long until their unacceptance of you, finally makes you realize just how hateful and nasty these people really are. You may not be able to communicate, or even understand yourself what is going on at the time, those micro aggressions towards you, towards those others like you, they add up and soon you burst. That is what happens to me, especially when I start seeing the micro aggressions towards me and others I identify with and I try to explain exactly how, what they are doing or saying, is making me feel and I am then further made to feel that if I was just a better person, then those things would not bother me.....this is their circular reasoning, here, let me cut you with this knife and then I am going to slap you for bleeding

There's nothing about swearing and having sex that's inherently *opposed to* being sweet and caring, though when drinking is involved with sex that can definitely make it more likely that you won't feel happy or safe about the situation.

Sometimes I don't feel listened to

 

[NoLightRemains]

I also tend to organize my thoughts and brain by having three split personalities. A young, childish persona that wants to live. A dark, gloomy persona that wants to die. And a mediator that tries to control things and maintain a balance. I don't think I fully have disassociative identity disorder, but organizing my thoughts in this way makes the most sense to me.