BPD and Recovery

[abyss]

I'm fairly certain I have undiagnosed BPD. I tried getting diagnosed but was dismissed as just having depression.
Has anyone had positive experiences with DBT etc for BPD? I know it's incurable, but can it actually be improved? The recovery accounts I see online seem like self-delusion a lot of the time, it is a problem in the brain that can't be permanently fixed, so I am skeptical but open to any user experiences here.

 

[Niko66]

I have a friend who says it has helped them a little bit, it's not easy but they say it's more manageable with DBT than without having had it.

 

[noaccount]

Hi Abyss - If there is any treatment you want to try, could you maybe still try to get it without that diagnosis?

I'm not sure what you mean by "incurable." Every person's feelings and personality change in many different ways over the course of their lifetime - in often unpredictable ways, that vary hugely from person to person. Just because one person has a certain experience for their whole life, doesn't mean every person will, does that make sense? Just because someone benefits from a drug or therapy doesn't mean their friend or neighbor necessarily would too. We're people, not statistics. :)

Also, how a doctor wants you to think and live may be very, very different than how you want to think and live - for instance, very often women's anger at men, or people not wanting to always participate in normative ways in work or school, is dismissed as "sickness" by the doctor. When in fact it's very valuable and meaningful to the person. You have the right to decide what is healthy for you.

Have you had a chance to look much at writings from psychiatric survivors and people who've self-undiagnosed?

Who Decides What a Mental Disorder Is? - NYRA

The definition of a mental disorder is a “dysfunction in the psychological, biological, or developmental processes underlying mental functioning.” Unfortunately, this definition is vague and leaves much room for debate and criticism. Since it is not entirely clear what “dysfunction” means, the...

www.youthrights.org

Why Anti-Authoritarians Are Diagnosed as Mentally Ill

In Bruce Levine's career he as spoken with hundreds of people diagnosed with ODD & ADHD. An astonishing number of these people are also anti-authoritarians.

www.madinamerica.com

 

[abyss]

Hi Abyss - If there is any treatment you want to try, could you maybe still try to get it without that diagnosis?

I'm not sure what you mean by "incurable." Every person's feelings and personality change in many different ways over the course of their lifetime - in often unpredictable ways, that vary hugely from person to person. Just because one person has a certain experience for their whole life, doesn't mean every person will, does that make sense? Just because someone benefits from a drug or therapy doesn't mean their friend or neighbor necessarily would too. We're people, not statistics. :)

Also, how a doctor wants you to think and live may be very, very different than how you want to think and live - for instance, very often women's anger at men, or people not wanting to always participate in normative ways in work or school, is dismissed as "sickness" by the doctor. When in fact it's very valuable and meaningful to the person. You have the right to decide what is healthy for you.

Have you had a chance to look much at writings from psychiatric survivors and people who've self-undiagnosed?

Who Decides What a Mental Disorder Is? - NYRA

The definition of a mental disorder is a “dysfunction in the psychological, biological, or developmental processes underlying mental functioning.” Unfortunately, this definition is vague and leaves much room for debate and criticism. Since it is not entirely clear what “dysfunction” means, the...

www.youthrights.org

Why Anti-Authoritarians Are Diagnosed as Mentally Ill

In Bruce Levine's career he as spoken with hundreds of people diagnosed with ODD & ADHD. An astonishing number of these people are also anti-authoritarians.

www.madinamerica.com

Thanks for this post, I'll check out these links.

 

[AshersGirl]

Just my experience. DBT gives you practical tools to view yourself from "outside the box" so to speak. They didn't change my default brain wiring. They just helped me to try to separate logically where my responses may be due to my intensity of emotion, which is what made me less likely to be able to identify the real from the imagined intent of other peoples words / actions.

I think they can be useful coping mechanisms but we have to be in the right frame of mind to utilise them.

Example - I know when I'm being illogical. I still go through all the emotions and the negative thought cycles that I always did, I just don't take them out on other people and I try to step outside that box before I externally react / respond. It made me more able to articulate to people things that might trigger me, that were seemingly inconsequential to them, and allowed them to be more mindful around me.

For me though I've had some quiet periods where my BPD was relatively stable, the problem is you can't anticipate the big hits in life, and those have also been the times where my emotional intensity increased to levels where all the knowledge in the world of practical techniques couldn't help because I was being overwhelmed by the feeling part. Or alternately disassociating because I couldn't handle the intensity. It's a rollercoaster. But it did I suppose help me manage the day to day for the smaller stuff, if that makes sense.

Good luck!

 

[noaccount]

Therapists also try convincing people in DBT that being angry about ANYTHING, pointing out that a family member is abusing them or that a job situation is bad for them, or being upset with or disagreeing with the therapist, is a "symptom," it's very gaslighting.

 

[abyss]

I don't even really get angry anymore. I just become irrationally sad and suicidal any time I experience rejection or abandonment. When I think someone is distancing themselves from me I become extremely pathetic all of a sudden and act out of character. It never gets any easier.
I think that's why I am dismissed as having major depressive disorder by professionals because I am mostly depressed but they never see how extreme my emotional reactions are.

 

[Kind enby]

So I'm diagnosed and in a DBT program.
My current therapist is the 8th one I've had, here in México conductism it's not very common and many therapists are straight up pseudo science bullshit so it's definitely an upgrade from where I've been

I've had attempts straight up after a session because of shitty therapists and at least DBT has helped a lot in crisis since I can call anytime I need and there's more than one person looking after me. Also my main therapist is really dope and seems to be very passionate about her work wich am sure helps a lot.

I'm sure DBT is not exempt from having shitty therapists but at least I've feel a lot more validated and sessions are more structured and with purpose, not just talking. And they teach me shit to do, I often don't but when I've had it actually helped.

 

[Shadow Life]

Just my experience. DBT gives you practical tools to view yourself from "outside the box" so to speak. They didn't change my default brain wiring. They just helped me to try to separate logically where my responses may be due to my intensity of emotion, which is what made me less likely to be able to identify the real from the imagined intent of other peoples words / actions.

I think they can be useful coping mechanisms but we have to be in the right frame of mind to utilise them.

Example - I know when I'm being illogical. I still go through all the emotions and the negative thought cycles that I always did, I just don't take them out on other people and I try to step outside that box before I externally react / respond. It made me more able to articulate to people things that might trigger me, that were seemingly inconsequential to them, and allowed them to be more mindful around me.

For me though I've had some quiet periods where my BPD was relatively stable, the problem is you can't anticipate the big hits in life, and those have also been the times where my emotional intensity increased to levels where all the knowledge in the world of practical techniques couldn't help because I was being overwhelmed by the feeling part. Or alternately disassociating because I couldn't handle the intensity. It's a rollercoaster. But it did I suppose help me manage the day to day for the smaller stuff, if that makes sense.

Good luck!

Your post was very helpful in describing how it helps, practically speaking. Thank you.

 

[MidnightDream]

I'm diagnosed, did it for a little bit and I can't say it helped, but I reckon if you get yourself a good and stable provider it certainly won't hurt to try! It's supposed to be the best thing out there for BPD.