Games Boys vs girls counting game

[darkest]

828 - something that scares me is that I don't know when am I actually thinking w a clear mind anymore, when SI kicked in I felt so numb and clear and set on living however it may be, and I woke up the next day laughing at that thought and realizing everything I fucked up when that intense feeling was kicked in, I still feel numb but also clear minded BUT set on trying to CTB again and just fight the SI, I'm so tired of all this bs, I just want my brain to explode into pieces

 

[Namelesa]

828 - something that scares me is that I don't know when am I actually thinking w a clear mind anymore, when SI kicked in I felt so numb and clear and set on living however it may be, and I woke up the next day laughing at that thought and realizing everything I fucked up when that intense feeling was kicked in, I still feel numb but also clear minded BUT set on trying to CTB again and just fight the SI, I'm so tired of all this bs, I just want my brain to explode into pieces

Yea :< When I tried attempting, I just wanted to keep trying it to see if one of these attempts would be successful. Sadly my anchor point broke so I can't do it anymore and literally trapped here with no effective methods.

827

 

[ningen_shikkaku]

827 - Hello all!

 

[Namelesa]

827 - Hello all!

Hellwo, just assuming you were trying to decrease the number?

825 or 827

 

[darkest]

826 - oh no! what was the anchor point?

 

[Namelesa]

828 - oh no! what was the anchor point?

It was my clothes rail in my wardrobe. I thought of that has the best place to do it as I am hidden and in my room when doing it so very very low chances of people finding me do it but it broke the second time I was attempting it. I was going to try ctb every night so I could get more used to the pain of hanging and to show how much I want it but I can't now so I am stuck here :<

825

 

[darkest]

826 - oh no, um is there a way you think you can fix it/get someone to fix it and make it seem like an accident? and other than that, are there any other anchor points other than that which are just not as convenient as the clothes rail? you could still use them if you figure out the sleeping patterns of everyone and the times they're all sleep at in common, and with enough stealth and planning, you could trial and error with it, and since you sleep a lot, they wouldn't suspect it as much as if they knew you stay awake late and frequently, if they did they'll start watching their sleep patterns

 

[Namelesa]

826 - oh no, um is there a way you think you can fix it/get someone to fix it and make it seem like an accident? and other than that, are there any other anchor points other than that which are just not as convenient as the clothes rail? you could still use them if you figure out the sleeping patterns of everyone and the times they're all sleep at in common, and with enough stealth and planning, you could trial and error with it, and since you sleep a lot, they wouldn't suspect it as much as if they knew you stay awake late and frequently, if they did they'll start watching their sleep patterns

Don't worry about the anchor point causing suspicion. My parents just thought the weight of the clothes broke it even tho that doesn't make sense.

It's just much more risky in other places especially as my sister stays up more later into the night. I don't want to use another anchor point in my room as my dog sleeps with me and I don't want him to see my dead body. They thankfully don't suspect anything from me if I stay up as I have done that plenty of times.

825

 

[darkest]

826 - oh I see, glad it didn't cause suspicion. are there times that your parents/siblings wouldn't be within proximity for at least an hour during the day instead of night? in that case that dog can be out, if so, are other anchor points reliable enough to consider in the first place? seeing how everything would be like can be useful so that you don't put in too much false hope into something just so it fails when you need it to work the most, like with the clothes rail, I'm so glad you tried it, clothes rails are supposed to be tough so maybe when it's properly fixed you could try again and remove everything on it if you haven't already and im pretty sure there's another way to make a knot or something so that the pressure is divided on the clothes rail and not concentrated on one weak point that causes it to break

 

[Namelesa]

826 - oh I see, glad it didn't cause suspicion. are there times that your parents/siblings wouldn't be within proximity for at least an hour during the day instead of night? in that case that dog can be out, if so, are other anchor points reliable enough to consider in the first place? seeing how everything would be like can be useful so that you don't put in too much false hope into something just so it fails when you need it to work the most, like with the clothes rail, I'm so glad you tried it, clothes rails are supposed to be tough so maybe when it's properly fixed you could try again and remove everything on it if you haven't already and im pretty sure there's another way to make a knot or something so that the pressure is divided on the clothes rail and not concentrated on one weak point that causes it to break

I really don't want to risk it in the day time as anyone could enter my room at any moment and as I have low pain tolerance so it's hard for me to attempt this method so I need all the time in the world.

I might try the clothes rail again but remove all the clothes on the section I am using and see if it doesn't break. I don't know if I could do another type of knot as the rope I have isn't that long.

825

 

[Sannti]

824

 

[Namelesa]

823

 

[darkest]

824 - yea that's understandable, you'll need to remove as many pieces of clothing as you can in comparison to your head's weight plus some more. in that case I don't think you'd need another knot, hope you find peace <3

 

[Namelesa]

824 - yea that's understandable, you'll need to remove as many pieces of clothing as you can in comparison to your head's weight plus some more. in that case I don't think you'd need another knot, hope you find peace <3

Thank you <3 maybe I will try it again soon then. I don't know how heavy my head is but I my weight is around 75kg and my height is 185cm. I assume that info would be helpful in figuring out the weight of my head.

823

 

[Shadows From Hell]

824

 

[darkest]

i think i searched up somewhere the weight of a human's head and it said 4 to 6 kilograms iirc
825

 

[Namelesa]

824

 

[darkest]

825 - the weakest clothes rail i could find online can hold 15 kg so if we pretend yours is at maximum capacity then remove half the stuff on there, maybe (that's not a good way of "calculating" that, but you get the point)

 

[Namelesa]

Okay I definitely try and practice it again at some point and hopefully get a successful attempt but get rid of all the clothes off the part I am using.

Yea! Partial hanging is on the menu again!

824

 

[darkest]

825 - HELL YEA I'm so glad there's still hope for us :D even if things don't go well for either of us, we'll find a way to escape the suffering and cycles we're trapped in respectively, OMORI and BASIL style xD (i call OMORI)

 

[Namelesa]

825 - HELL YEA I'm so glad there's still hope for us :D even if things don't go well for either of us, we'll find a way to escape the suffering and cycles we're trapped in respectively, OMORI and BASIL style xD (i call OMORI)

Hehehe thank you <3

824

 

[NoPoint2Life]

Kill. Me. Now.
823

 

[Namelesa]

Kill. Me. Now.
823

I am sorry :< do you want to vent about any of the pain you are going through?

822

 

[NoPoint2Life]

My mom got released from the hospital yesterday and she has a highly contagious infection in her colon. And of course the way it's most easily transmitted is the horrible side effect that she seems to be getting from all her antibiotics. I have contamination OCD. These do not mix well. Plus, I have already been in caretaker mode since midnight and I am not good at caretaking!

821

 

[Namelesa]

My mom got released from the hospital yesterday and she has a highly contagious infection in her colon. And of course the way it's most easily transmitted is the horrible side effect that she seems to be getting from all her antibiotics. I have contamination OCD. These do not mix well. Plus, I have already been in caretaker mode since midnight and I am not good at caretaking!

821

820 I am really sorry :< I sorry you have this forced responsibility. I imagine OCD makes you feel so paranoid of getting germs so I am so sorry you being put into a situation that makes you feel even worse. You don't deserve to have to take care of her all the time as you didn't have much choice.

 

[NoPoint2Life]

This is one of those times I hate being an only child
819

 

[darkest]

820 - that's awful, i hope things get better for you <3

 

[Namelesa]

819 I am so sorry :c I hope it gets easier in some way soon.

 

[darkest]

820

 

[Namelesa]

819