Destin
Member
- Aug 15, 2018
- 32
Weird rambly story but here we go...
So I started talking to a boy on Okcupid back in January. We spent one lovely month and a half talking to each other online. I fell in love pretty much right away. He treated me with a respect no one else ever has. We met for Valentines day. We had sex (his first time) and about 5 mins in we both almost reached a simultaneous orgasm but he stopped us and said he didnt want me to see him like that.
He has autism and get over stimulated very easily. He looked like he was in pain trying to kiss me. On top of that he only wanted us to date for a couple of years, and then said he would inevitably want to be alone again. He was hyper practical in this sense.
I doubt Ill get much sympathy here but I couldnt handle all this and broke up with him. Ive dated and had sex with a lot of people and 100% of it has been shit. That was the first time I ever had sex with someone I was in love with. The fact that we almost came at the same time felt insane.
Not being able to be intimate with someone after so many years of not experiencing it devastated me. And knowing he'd leave someday was too much.
Anyway he knew I was suicidal since the beginning or the relationship and said when I was ready in the future he would assist me. We talked about it briefly a few times and hadnt entirely decided on how but it nothing else he was going to be there for emotional support.
I know I did what was best. The relationship would have went to hell if I stayed. If ive learned anything of there years its that you cant force something to work and love means not trying to change someone. But now I have to do this alone and im so sad. But I guess in a way its true to how I lived. Alone.
So I started talking to a boy on Okcupid back in January. We spent one lovely month and a half talking to each other online. I fell in love pretty much right away. He treated me with a respect no one else ever has. We met for Valentines day. We had sex (his first time) and about 5 mins in we both almost reached a simultaneous orgasm but he stopped us and said he didnt want me to see him like that.
He has autism and get over stimulated very easily. He looked like he was in pain trying to kiss me. On top of that he only wanted us to date for a couple of years, and then said he would inevitably want to be alone again. He was hyper practical in this sense.
I doubt Ill get much sympathy here but I couldnt handle all this and broke up with him. Ive dated and had sex with a lot of people and 100% of it has been shit. That was the first time I ever had sex with someone I was in love with. The fact that we almost came at the same time felt insane.
Not being able to be intimate with someone after so many years of not experiencing it devastated me. And knowing he'd leave someday was too much.
Anyway he knew I was suicidal since the beginning or the relationship and said when I was ready in the future he would assist me. We talked about it briefly a few times and hadnt entirely decided on how but it nothing else he was going to be there for emotional support.
I know I did what was best. The relationship would have went to hell if I stayed. If ive learned anything of there years its that you cant force something to work and love means not trying to change someone. But now I have to do this alone and im so sad. But I guess in a way its true to how I lived. Alone.
