Bestfriend died from SN a couple weeks ago

[wljourney]

she became fascinated with near death experiences for a few months before. Read books on the afterlife and stuff. She was kind of morbid so i didn't think anything of it. It was normal behavior

I am very sorry for your loss. It's difficult to process this and I understand why you would be looking for her profile.

I remember someone talking about her focus and increased interest in death, but don't recall their user name. Iirc they described it as part of their personality disorder. Focussing on one very specific thing and going "all in". And that her family was used to this type of focus but seemingly weren't worried.

Anyway. Long story short: we will try and help you find her but it's going to be really difficult. Very few post personal details and goodbye threads.

In the end, you likely couldn't have Stopped her. This was not your fault or failure. Most of us don't blame those we leave behind, we care for them and don't want them to feel loss, pain and grief. But at some point our own pain is so overwhelming that we simply can't continue to suffer.

 

[houseofleaves]

So. Did she live in New Zealand?

 

[FuneralCry]

Rest in peace. At least those who are gone are free from their suffering but I can imagine that it must be painful being in that situation. I'm sorry that you are going through this.

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

I think I chatted with her. If it's who I'm thinking of, she obviously was in tremendous pain.( I DMed you with more info).
Many people can be helped and their lives transformed. But some of us reach a place that seems beyond rescue.
This may be hard to understand if you're NOT in a similar headspace.
Years and years without any hope. Misery day after day. The only thing you dream about is ending the misery. It's a place beyond any easy fix - stopping booze, antidepressants, a new job, a new city, a new boyfriend… or maybe those fixes might help but you're exhausted…
I'm sorry your friend did not entirely confide in you and offer you a chance to share how much you loved and cared about her, how much she meant to you. She probably didn't want to burden you or allow you to interfere with her plans.
Either way, you must be very hurt and frustrated that you were not given a chance to try and help.

Losing your best friend must be unimaginably painful. You have my sympathies.

 

[blueskies]

I am really sorry for your friend, you and those your dear friend has left behind. I too am in a similar position as you and it's a confusing, painful and indescribable barrage of emotions. Looking for my person on here and I don't see them to get the closure I hope to find. I hope with the help of the kind members on here, you will find your friend and hopefully some closure or understanding of what they were going through before making this sad choice. If you want someone to talk to , who is able to empathise with you, please feel free to chat with me. I'm sorry you're going through this

 

[NobodyKnowsMe]

Which country are you from? @Imissyoumydarling died around that time but is in New Zealand. I think her name was Savannah?

@Imissyoumydarling drove to a lodge and took her SN there. OP states his friend died at home alone.