Being suicidal I finally have compassion and empathy for my fellow humans.

[FireFox]

Experiencing severe depression and suicidal thoughts I finally have a newer and deeper sense of compassion, empathy and care for those who are suffering.

Being suicidal I just feel so trapped and overwhelmed with it all, I just want it all to stop. Right now absolutely nothing gives me relief from all this pain except death.

I finally understand how it feels to really hit rock bottom, to be so alone in all your problems and having people belittle you for not " getting over it" and even blaming you for "not trying hard enough". I now know how it feels to be exhausted with life and wanting it all to come to an end.

Being suicidal I finally know compassion for others suffering because I wouldn't wish this torment of having intrusive suicidal thoughts on my worst enemy.

 

[Z-A]

It sucks that we have to experience the same thing ourselves first to finally understand another because we otherwise don't understand why one desires death.

 

[Dayrain]

Experiencing severe depression and suicidal thoughts I finally have a newer and deeper sense of compassion, empathy and care for those who are suffering.

Being suicidal I just feel so trapped and overwhelmed with it all, I just want it all to stop. Right now absolutely nothing gives me relief from all this pain except death.

I finally understand how it feels to really hit rock bottom, to be so alone in all your problems and having people belittle you for not " getting over it" and even blaming you for "not trying hard enough". I now know how it feels to be exhausted with life and wanting it all to come to an end.

Being suicidal I finally know compassion for others suffering because I wouldn't wish this torment of having intrusive suicidal thoughts on my worst enemy.

This reads like a poem.

 

[FireFox]

This reads like a poem.

@Dayrain Thanks how I write is how I see the world around me. I feel and see things more intensely

 

[Tobacco]

I remember I used to ignore people suffering because I believed in karma. Now that said cope is gone there is only pain...

 

[FireFox]

I remember I used to ignore people suffering because I believed in karma. Now that said cope is gone there is only pain...

@Tobacco The problem with society is people do not want to connect meaningfully with others and the world around them. We become too materialistic, self centred, obessed with status that people have neglected the things that do matter

All the problems I had last year when I reached out on reddit and discord servers people kept judging me, giving bullshit armchair psychology diagnosis and told me to "see a therapist" and to "get over" my problems and pretty much belittled me for reaching. Even the support communities I experienced this behaviour.

Looking back now all I needed was friends and comfort for everything I went through. Only when I met other people in real life going through similar situations I went through I got better slowly. Only by healthy, compassionate shared bonding over similar issues I began to heal and my confidence slowly rebuilding. I was able to connect, sympathise and comfort others going through the same issues.

The reddit and discord people told me to go to therapy because they did not want to deal with me and saw telling me to go therapy as a their way of saying " look we tried to help but it is your fault " - ulimately they just wanted to virtual signal to make themselves feel better.

These same arseholes will be writing oh why didn't she reach out if I successfully killed myself and it went viral. These people can't see they are the problem

The lockdown was an opportunity for society to change for the better but everyone wanted to go back to their old habits and living once the pandemic ended. The lockdown brought out the worst in people but people forget that.

That 1 bit of kindness can make a difference.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

It sucks that we have to experience the same thing ourselves first to finally understand another because we otherwise don't understand why one desires death.

I agree. This is one of the reasons why we can't easily kill ourselves to begin with. If more people understood, they'd perhaps be gentle to let us leave. However, as of right now, they won't ever do such a thing

 

[locked*n*loaded]

For people who are suffering in this world, I have a great deal of empathy and sympathy. For most people, though, the majority of people on this planet, who are just plain assholes, I have no compassion, no empathy, no regard. In my experience most people are just plain creeps and they deserve no quarter.

 

[FitsTime]

For people who are suffering in this world, I have a great deal of empathy and sympathy. For most people, though, the majority of people on this planet, who are just plain assholes, I have no compassion, no empathy, no regard. In my experience most people are just plain creeps and they deserve no quarter.

Totally agree.

 

[Shar]

privileged people are usually assholes and theres no doubt that I am much more empathetic than I used to be. Pain brings empathy.
But holy hell, the hate and empathy I feel for humanity rival each other.

 

[cantthinkofusername]

i just feel pity and disgust
i dont think the world can be fixed

 

[FireFox]

privileged people are usually assholes and theres no doubt that I am much more empathetic than I used to be. Pain brings empathy.
But holy hell, the hate and empathy I feel for humanity rival each other.

@Shar I have met plenty of underprivileged people who are real bitter arseholes about their circumstances and lash out at people who have experienced similar circumstances.

I used to belong to a discord server group and the femcel moderator constantly kept picking on me pretty much from the day I joined. On the server I opened up about my loss of confidence as a result of being in a toxic workplace. I was youngest in the department and my older workplace colleagues humiliated me including my boss, who cruelly mocked my immaturity and humiliated me infront of senior management. It was my first full time job and I felt so broken after everything. I used to be confident.

The moderator she shamed me over my feelings and made my entire post about herself.

She explained how she left her foreign country to take a unpaid internship overseas. She went on about her bullying boss made her cry everyday and how her family had to send emergency money to her because she needed mental health care and how she had to get over it. She kept putting me down yep and got ALL the sympathy from everyone on the server.

The bullying femcel arsehole then does her armchair psychology diagnosing me as "traumatised' and how I need to see a therapist and to get over it. She was so cruel and bullying at the already I was having the worst year of my life with so much going on.

Everyone else on the server joined in her ganging up on me then she bans me.

I have parents who are immigrants and anyone who takes an unpaid internship aboard is a fool. My parents never worked for free.

i just feel pity and disgust
i dont think the world can be fixed

@cantthinkofusername I think the pandemic was our last chance to fix the world and society for the better but instead it exposed the true selfishness of the human race. There is no going back because this behaviour was tolerated during the pandemic and not shunned enough.

The pandemic made me an even stronger antinatalist. The human race has lived for far too long and all procreation is doing is enabling the cycle of suffering for generation after generation. To continue this is absolutely immoral.

The fact we have learnt nothing from the pandemic just shows humanity can't be helped.

I agree. This is one of the reasons why we can't easily kill ourselves to begin with. If more people understood, they'd perhaps be gentle to let us leave. However, as of right now, they won't ever do such a thing

@ijustwishtodie One of the worst things about having a mental illness is nobody sees how hard you really tried to give yourself a better life and how you fought till the very end.

I now realise suicide happens because the illness ulimately takes over the mind and "wins".

Being mentally ill there is no dignity it is a lifetime of fighting with one's self til one can fight no more.
If only people could see that rather than judging.

 

[FireFox]

For people who are suffering in this world, I have a great deal of empathy and sympathy. For most people, though, the majority of people on this planet, who are just plain assholes, I have no compassion, no empathy, no regard. In my experience most people are just plain creeps and they deserve no quarter.

@locked*n*loaded The problem with society is everyone wants to be seen as a good person but nobody wants to be a good human being.

People are happy to post the suicide hotline number whenever a popular celebrity or influencer kills themselves or some feel good quote but the same people will treat you like absolute shit the minute you reach out.

I have been called a ",tramua dumper", told to "get over" my problems upsetting me and even been told I am upsetting other people for being depressed.

I reached out all I got was treated like an inconvenience by those in reality and in online mental health support spaces.

Too many people in society are too self centred to care about other people's problems and suffering. Mentally ill people are seen as an inconvenience to their lives. Everybody is happy to preach about caring about mental health but the minute the problem comes on their doorstep everything changes.

 

[CTB Dream]

yea say ctb make undrstd othr feel how know how all hpn all sffr pain all nonsns, see all life nonsns all all war ecnmy pltic etc etc all all nonsns pol all sffr no end, human awfl species keep rprdct see all horr no stop see pandmi etc still same, species no undrstd many prblm impsbl slv, no able do any no posbl slv prblm no time travle etc only way slv ctb

 

[Alexei_Kirillov]

@locked*n*loaded The problem with society is everyone wants to be seen as a good person but nobody wants to be a good human being.

People are happy to post the suicide hotline number whenever a popular celebrity or influencer kills themselves or some feel good quote but the same people will treat you like absolute shit the minute you reach out.

I have been called a ",tramua dumper", told to "get over" my problems upsetting me and even been told I am upsetting other people for being depressed.

I reached out all I got was treated like an inconvenience by those in reality and in online mental health support spaces.

Too many people in society are too self centred to care about other people's problems and suffering. Mentally ill people are seen as an inconvenience to their lives. Everybody is happy to preach about caring about mental health but the minute the problem comes on their doorstep everything changes.

I've also gone through this both in real life and online. Like you, what I needed was human connection and to feel that someone on this earth genuinely cared about me, and instead all I got back was "go see a therapist" and its many variations. It grinds my gears to no end how people will say that they're for you and then completely fail to actually be there for you. It has convinced me that they just like the idea of "helping" a suicidal person out, not the actual act of it, which can admittedly be difficult and uncomfortable at times. They're probably also subconsciously avoiding future guilt, so that if you ever actually go through with it, they can say, "Well, I said I was there." No one is willing to actually get their hands dirty and truly involve themselves in someone else's life. Which is fine, they have no obligation to do so especially if they don't know you that well, but if that's the case, then they do have an obligation to be honest about it instead of pretending otherwise.

 

[FireFox]

I've also gone through this both in real life and online. Like you, what I needed was human connection and to feel that someone on this earth genuinely cared about me, and instead all I got back was "go see a therapist" and its many variations. It grinds my gears to no end how people will say that they're for you and then completely fail to actually be there for you. It has convinced me that they just like the idea of "helping" a suicidal person out, not the actual act of it, which can admittedly be difficult and uncomfortable at times. They're probably also subconsciously avoiding future guilt, so that if you ever actually go through with it, they can say, "Well, I said I was there." No one is willing to actually get their hands dirty and truly involve themselves in someone else's life. Which is fine, they have no obligation to do so especially if they don't know you that well, but if that's the case, then they do have an obligation to be honest about it instead of pretending otherwise.

@Alexei_Kirillov Sorry you went through all that. If seeing a therapist was easy we would all be doing it, it is a privilege to for a person to be able afford acess to good quality therapy. Therapy is a luxury for middle class people and rich people.

People underestimate the power and real warmth of human connection and the difference it can make at times. We would be a much better world if we connected meaningfully with people but the thing is people don't want to.

Suicide is a humanity problem and symptom of a world devoid of empathy and compassion. People get surprised someone kills themselves but I am sorry what where people expecting to happen?

Why should a person stay in a world where nobody cares about them, excludes them from participating in society and refuses to help them with their problems. When people feel like they have no place in the world some will opt for suicide while others will want to destroy the world.

 

[groucho]

It's one of the reasons I like this forum, warts and all humanity, no bravardo just people being honest and open. It's the only place I feel safe to talk about my troubles.