Venting Being kind of dumb

[scatterbrained]

I am actually stupid (and, well, scatterbrained. :P). I didn't come to this conclusion because of bullying or verbal abuse, but from my own observations.

I genuinely take a lot longer to process and understand things than most other people, and when I do, it's on a shallower level. I also have a hard time articulating myself. (It took me way too long to write this post, lol.)

When someone asks for my opinion on a topic, I'll often have literally nothing to say, or just surface-level observations. I try to think of something, but my mind is just blank. And even if I do have something to say, I'll struggle to express it.

When I'm given instructions (especially verbal) for a task that isn't exceedingly simple, I'll likely misunderstand something. The other person often has to repeat themselves several times or physically move me into the correct location/position.

I am okay academically, but in terms of day-to-day life I have absolutely no common sense and I frequently make lapses in logic that other people wouldn't. I'd give examples if I weren't too embarrassed. To give you an idea, pouring water over a grease fire sounds like something I would do. ^^;

They say less intelligent people tend to be happier; if that's true, it's only when you don't know you are. I want to understand things and be useful, but I just can't. I'm always causing problems for other people or embarrassing myself and I'm sick of it. :(

It's one of the reasons why I think it was a waste of time for me to have tried recovering. So what if I don't feel like killing myself anymore, if I'm just being a constant burden anyway? How can you even start to feel better if your brain just fundamentally doesn't work right? I don't have problems that need fixing, I am the problem that needs fixing.

I keep thinking that if I were a little smarter, then I would have managed to ctb ages ago. Unfortunately, I'm still here: crawling at a snail's pace towards when I can finally accomplish what should be a straightforward task. Curse my brain! (Or lack thereof.)

 

[Cosmophobic]

I don't want to be one of those platitude spewing people you find on most mainstream social media when someone makes a post like this but I'm gonna go ahead and say it. You don't sound dumb.

Or maybe I just don't want to accept it because according to your criteria I'm also dumb.

 

[Wolf Girl]

Are you autistic? I relate to everything you wrote. It turns out I'm autistic and my IQ is normal but my processing speed is extremely low.

 

[nool]

I genuinely take a lot longer to process and understand things than most other people, and when I do, it's on a shallower level. I also have a hard time articulating myself. (It took me way too long to write this post, lol.)

When someone asks for my opinion on a topic, I'll often have literally nothing to say, or just surface-level observations. I try to think of something, but my mind is just blank. And even if I do have something to say, I'll struggle to express it.

I can relate to this part. When I was in therapy, my therapist would ask me how I was feeling and I would be like, "I don't know," every single time. It's not just feelings, I suck at putting anything into words. It's why I stopped writing; I just couldn't write what I wanted to. It's so frustrating to me, because deep down I know how I feel but it's like it's locked away for my eyes only.

 

[NotRealKiller]

Your experience just couldn't be more relatable to me, I just tend to struggle a lot with so many simple everyday things that it gets to a point that I've literally thought that exact same thing about me being the problem that needs fixing.

Maybe it doesn't mean much coming from a stranger that's also quite new to the site but I feel you.

(I really hope I didn't word it weirdly since English isn't my first language).

 

[Nightfoot]

Processing things a little slower doesn't mean you're dumb. I understand the frustration, though. I'm of reasonable intelligence but I process some things a little slower, too. Another commenter mentioned the possibility of autism. My counselor told me she had considered a diagnosis of Asperger's at one time.

 

[Hollowman]

I'm the same way. It makes thriving impossible. Hopefully you'll find a way to improve.

 

[whywere]

We are ALL the same, generally speaking, HOWEVER what makes each and every person unique and SO valuable is how they think, perceive things and imagine.

I am dumber than a rock on some aspect, heck everyone has their Achilles heel, BUT in the Long-term scope of life everyone has so much valuable and integral parts to add, that makes not only that person, but EVERYONE'S life better.

You are a WONDERFULLY thoughtful and SMART person. So, you might think differently, or you might think that you are out of step of others, NOPE! NEVER! You are GREAT and as you add years and look back AND forward you WILL start to see just how important, valuable and needed that you are.

Heavens, I did not get going in life till the age of 28 and I have been told all my life that I am sometimes a scatter brain, maybe so, BUT then why do folks ask me my thoughts? HUMMM? Maybe I am NOT a scatter brain.

Take a step back, relax, and look in the mirror at a wonderfully kind, caring AND smart person, that is YOU. I 100% believe in you and you ARE awesome period.

Walter

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

Oh poor thing don't blame yourself, i know some people who are so dumb and stupid as well that all they do spend time mocking children's looks as well as adults unprovoked ( it must be a deep insecurity issue) this one academically and work wise can't achieve anything ( his greatest achievement is lying and being a what's app group administrator). I understand though why is he like this because people of other races always compares him to subhumans and what not and no matter what he will still beg for their acceptance because for this person it's better to be humiliated by anyone in the name of "friendship" than enjoy his own company.

You seem to be way better off as a person that this person. Any person who steals are being accommodated tkkkk is beyond dumb, dumber and dumbest. Spending all day scheming and lying and manipulating and he let a woman beat him before. I really pity him.

I will be keeping him in my prayers for him to get better soon. This person only passed two subjects during GSCES so he couldn't be helped and saved. Poor thing being shit both academically and intellectually, I guess being dehumanised and compared to subhumans was exhausting so he had to play uncle Tom to make them accept him and laugh.

Gotta give it to the coloniser for being so inventive and creative in racially abusing this man - That must have lowered his IQ levels even more.

Prayers to those racist enablers, uncle Toms and Coons.

It couldn't be me ‍♀.

Ps - He is very qualified in begging for likes and comments on Facebook though and if he don't get enough likes and comments he cry "jealousy".

Prayers to this little man- Playing Uncle Tom and a coon - His best role yet . I'm sure you are way better that this man who will defend and cover for those who have racially abused him and called him every racist name in the book.

Prayers to this little man - Can I get an amen