• Hey Guest,

    We wanted to share a quick update with the community.

    Our public expense ledger is now live, allowing anyone to see how donations are used to support the ongoing operation of the site.

    👉 View the ledger here

    Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.

    If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC):
    Ethereum (ETH):
    Monero (XMR):
A

Action

Member
Oct 18, 2023
50
 
  • Informative
  • Love
  • Like
Reactions: Sims3losertrait, The Eternal One, niki wonoto and 6 others
T

thousandislandstare

Member
Nov 30, 2019
52
I'm glad there is research being done. I was in the gifted program and I'm a bit older and at the time of my testing, I don't think there was really much awareness of what was then known as Aspergers. I have not been diagnosed with ASD, but it seems very likely that I am on the spectrum.

The IQ assessment was a double edged sword. It provided me with opportunities that not everyone is fortunate enough to have as a child, but it also often seemed to provide justification for neglect. There are a lot of very basic things I was never taught how to do and a lot of things that seem to come naturally to other people that completely baffle me, things that are pretty essential to surviving in this society.

Autism is difficult to discuss with other people because the popular conception of autism is of a child with very high support needs and an intellectual disability. People immediately jump to the topics of SSI, job coaches, and caretakers and when you try to explain, you quickly find yourself being accused of trying to cheat the system when you never requested any of those services. You find yourself in arguments about "quirky tiktok zoomers." I am a 41 year old man and barely have any idea what they're talking about. And those "quirky zoomers" are probably valid, anyway.

Bringing up IQ only escalates hostility. You end up in an argument about whether or not you're the smartest person on Earth, face accusations of entitlement, engage with assumptions that you took an invalid online quiz a week ago. You just have to keep so much to yourself and it's extremely isolating. The expectations feel too high and it feels impossible to ever meet them. You use the part of your brain that was meant for rotating shapes and spotting patterns to navigate the world, as if you're using a saucepan as a hammer or a butterknife as a screwdriver. Life has been torture and for me, the ticking time bomb has finally exploded.

I'm wondering if any of you have experienced life similarly and I'm guessing that you have.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: whocaresabouttrans, m1v, The Eternal One and 5 others
zipzamoly1

zipzamoly1

Zippoly
Jan 12, 2026
30
  • Love
  • Like
Reactions: The Eternal One, thelostautistic, telekon and 1 other person
insekurity

insekurity

wannabe angel
Jun 11, 2026
15
checks out. only have high average iq (but tbf i only got tested last year when i was severely burnt out and probs cognitively declined from chronic sleep deprivation and generally piss poor mental health) but ive thought about wanting to "go home" while in my bed since i was fucking 6 and first attempted to ctb at 11 (by choking myself with a blanket of all things, dumbass with no internet access)
 
  • Love
Reactions: The Eternal One and thousandislandstare
C

ConfusedClouds

Mage
Mar 9, 2024
548
using a saucepan as a hammer or a butterknife as a screwdriver
This really resonated with me. I have no autism, but there's a possibility of a mess of neurodivergence, dyslexia from when I was late teens (late 2000s) just to allow my exam extra time to continue at university (school had accepted more informal assessments). But I have always been reasonable with reading/writing/spotting errors so it never sat comfortably.

Anyway, the way you describe existing and surviving, maybe even thriving, but through what feels like random life hacks. Not the 'real' way. But then you just end up kinda getting praised for your proactivity and ingenuity. Then its like, ok, but how else do you do this? There's an 'official' way? So its a total mess of confusion of am I really thick and missing something obvious or am I really smart and solving things all over the place with what seems obvious to me but others don't seem to think/see.

But then that also leaves me feeling like I've already maxed out on life hacks. If I'm struggling with something, it feels like there's genuinely no way around it and I'm totally stuck. But then thats so hard to explain and people just seem to think you're already solving it with the life hacks. But its like, no, I'm maxed out with that, there's nowhere else for me to turn.

Urgh. Launching myself down a rabbit hole of venting where I don't have words nor proper examples to hand, so I'll stop myself there. But thanks for that analogy of living with make-do solutions/hacks.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: Sims3losertrait and The Eternal One
D

dirkw83

Student
Mar 4, 2026
155
The isolation is the worse bro. Just always being alone for years and years wears you down hard.
 
  • Love
Reactions: thousandislandstare
A

Action

Member
Oct 18, 2023
50
Bringing up IQ only escalates hostility. You end up in an argument about whether or not you're the smartest person on Earth, face accusations of entitlement, engage with assumptions that you took an invalid online quiz a week ago. You just have to keep so much to yourself and it's extremely isolating. The expectations feel too high and it feels impossible to ever meet them. You use the part of your brain that was meant for rotating shapes and spotting patterns to navigate the world, as if you're using a saucepan as a hammer or a butterknife as a screwdriver. Life has been torture and for me, the ticking time bomb has finally exploded.

I'm wondering if any of you have experienced life similarly and I'm guessing that you

Yes, I like that saucepan-hammer analogy. Very accurate description of my experience. 'Too smart' can be painful and frustrating, especially when it comes along with increased sensitivity to injustice when trying to intellectualize and attempt to make sense of a chaotic world. It's kind of like a brain-prison
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: whocaresabouttrans, ConfusedClouds, The Eternal One and 1 other person
Cauliflour

Cauliflour

I'm the doodler, I make terrible doodles.
Mar 24, 2025
782
I don't know what my IQ is (but considering it's biased towards maths and science, it's probably nothing special) but people have told me throughout my life that I'm very smart. I've never thought of it that way, I just assumed suicidal thoughts was just an autistic trait to me considering how it's integrated itself into my personality.
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: ConfusedClouds and The Eternal One
T

thousandislandstare

Member
Nov 30, 2019
52
Regarding the saucepan and butter knife thing, I meant that I have never ever had the right tools for the job when it came to interpreting all of the unspoken rules of life.
 
thefirstluminary

thefirstluminary

never knows best
Mar 9, 2026
219
geS0h8YjqNiCG00.gif
 
  • Yay!
Reactions: thousandislandstare
C

CatGoMeyow

Member
May 5, 2026
27
I am high IQ, likely neurodivergent. It's a very isolated life. I've spent the past 11 years mostly just engaged in my own stuff: reading books, building things. I've read about my condition that for folks like us everything out there seems drab. The conversations are boring, the people aren't doing anything interesting, they aren't making discoveries or contributing originality. It all looks pretty pale and it's hard to latch into what people are doing because they are lacking in context, self-awareness or simply don't know much about what they are doing or why. I need to break this though, we can learn things from all different sorts of people and raw intellectual engine or giftedness is not the full dimension of life. Still, it is very hard. Prefer not to ever really share my interests with people. They say they like classical music, so you ask them, and they can't say anything about it (the composer's life, the historical era, the form, the theory, etc.) So the things you crave to talk with people actually go cold or turn to disgust signal and you just prefer to be hidden and not really know anything about others. You seem to be more intellectually pure and capable when you aren't involved with others, too. Could be the unfortunate truth for the great scientists, inventors, writers in our history... they were often isolated and not married.
 
A

Action

Member
Oct 18, 2023
50
@catgomeow, It's true that many great scientists, inventors and writers were often suffering introverts. In fact, the concept of art usually is the artist's pain bleeding out into creative expression. The "tortured artist introvert" is a classic archetype defined by deep introspection, a compulsion for solitary work, and a tendency to channel intense and overwhelming emotions into creative output. They view the world with extreme sensitivity, feeling alienated by superficiality while maintaining an obsessive, perfectionist drive to perfect their craft. I hope to be able to create something meaningful before I go
 

Similar threads