At what age did you realize being born is a curse?

[_AllCatsAreGrey_]

8

At that time I asked my mom why she didn't abort me. I still think that would have been better. Still here at 47 feeling obligated to those close to me.

 

[Dark Moon]

I haven't wanted to live since I was 10 years old, probably since then I wish I wasn't born.

 

[itsgone2]

Ok, I'm feeling ashamed for being a delusional for more than 3 decades, as I only realize life is shit - for me and some - and will continue being when I achieved 30, seeing that nothing special happened.

Don't feel bad. I've never enjoyed life, but only realized what a complete sham it is recently, and I'm in my 50s.
On one hand, slaving away for a hope to survive in retirement seems incredibly stupid. On the other I think the Amish have it way more figured out than we do. They work a lot, and everyone works, but the community supports each other, live off the land, relatively few illnesses.
In comparison, corporate rat race is incredibly stupid.

 

[Irisse]

I was 12.

 

[woodlandcreature]

When I was 5, I started praying I'd get cancer and die. I wasn't conscious enough then to phrase it like that, of course, but I do think that's where that kind of mentality started for me. By 8, I was actively suicidal so that'd be my second guess.

 

[vanillamilkshakes]

11.

 

[ABadPerson]

There was never a specific turning point, as my life always sucked and my single mother made sure to let me know how much of it was my fault.

 

[Michelstaedter]

It's hard to remember exactly when, since I was depressed or fearful when I was around 11 or 12 years old. As a child, maybe around 9 or 10, I used to be afraid of the death of a loved one or my own, so I don't know if you could say I saw life as a curse. However, seeing people suffering and knowing that life is complicated and that I would end up where I am now (NEET and depressed), it was when I was about 15 or 16 years old.

 

[TheHolySword]

Being born isn't a curse. Living with what comes after is the curse. I brought joy and laughter and warmth to people. I was afforded the opportunity to love and be loved. I think it was a blessing that I could. The curse is that despite it all, I still want to die. Knowing my peace will be their suffering.

 

[Eudaimonic]

When I was as young as 6-7, I recall wishing I had not been born (this is reasonably common according to Sarah Perry). However, I didn't realize how awful existence truly was until I was around 14.

 

[Namelesa]

like age 17 (the time when my first relationship ended) is the point where I would say me being born was a curse as then I learned about anti-natilism then

tho at age 8 and I was thinking "every year gets worse" so maybe I thought living was a curse too seeing as I would have to go through more stressful classes in school to then having to do even more work with a job and also having to see my body become something I was less comfortable with as I grew up (tho this last part has been solved thanks to transition.

 

[unluckysadness]

At 10yo when I was put in a boarding school by my father and I was molested by other children and teachers. Today these teachers should go in jail. But I didn't file a claim because I didn't have the energy and now it's too late (judicial prescription).
I realized at 10 that human being can be evil. That's why I've been alone all my life. As a lot of people here, my childhood was stolen, then my teen years, then my adult years and now I'm a poor isolated disabled middle aged guy who just talks with his cat and his mother. So pathetic, but I'm not the only one who is destroyed by other.