Discussion are you detectably depressed or suicidal to strangers or colleagues?

[sayire]

I always wondered how many people I see when I am waking down the street are actually depressed?

I can guess very few folks likely are from the facial expression and body language I observe.

I presume some of them are actually suicidal too, but I could never tell if anyone is.

I am sure close friends can see through to see depression to a much larger extent.

this post is about NOT close friends being able to figure if one is suicidal or depressed, but from someone just acquaintance or lesser.

 

[the joker death]

credo che i miei colleghi siano consapevoli del fatto che non sono proprio una persona serena, non ho amici e la famiglia fa finta di non vedere e si convince che sono depressa per non soffrire.

 

[Huntfish34]

Good question, thanks for sharing this with us.

I'm fairly certain that numerous people around me have noticed, ( strangers, co-workers, friends , family...) I believe it's why some of my friends have quit talking, ghost me, or even just very short 1 word responses to try and be nice.

Can't say I necessarily blame them either..... I've been so negative and downright toxic , they are probably tired of it all. FML. -

 

[CrestfallenMima]

It's not hard to guess that I'm depressed.
I walk and speak slowly, I'm super pale and have heavy eyebags. I'm basically a zombie.

 

[vitbar]

I used to hide it. Blame my episodes on tiredness and missed sleep. Last few years they got bad enough that I stopped caring enough to hide it. Then I started speaking about it too.

 

[Elliana Berriana]

People can probably tell when I'm in an even worse mood than usual, but that just seems like I'm having a bad day. I just automatically hide it, I don't even notice that I'm doing so. Even when I'm visibly having an awful day, no one asks me if I'm OK, so maybe they don't notice. The only person who ever asked was my then boyfriend, but I broke up with him cause the relationship was toxic. I'm just used to hiding my feelings, so no one can really tell.

 

[suicidalloser]

why does it matter, they can't do anything about it anyways.

 

[Unwr!tten]

I think people know I'm very depressed, but they'd be horrified if they found out I was on this site and had SN.

 

[sometimes.sometimes]

To some people, yeah, but it usually revolves around whether I am angry or not. When it does go towards depression, I just brush it off and fake a smile.

 

[cgrtt.brns]

i put maybe even strangers as i have a very depressed resting facial expression, poor posture, avoid eye contact and disassociate a lot in public. i also dress like an emo swamp monster with no personal hygiene or sense of fashion so i think ppl rightly assume i dont hold much value over my life. idk about colleagues, when i had a job they probably assumed i was suicidal or at least depressed just bc i looked a lot more stereotypically emo during that time and was painfully awkward to talk to.

since joining sasu ive found myself looking at strangers at questioning to myself whether they might be suicidal too. before i just assumed everyone else was perfectly happy but now i realise its a lot more common than i thought.

 

[alonely]

Maybe collegues and strangers can tell. No one has said anything. I think it's easily explained away that I am just a quiet introverted person, or maybe they think i am mean or rude for not smiling or talking, or maybe that I am neurodivergent.

 

[betternever2havbeen]

I rarely leave the house but I think I can hide it ok talking to people if I have to. I look pretty ill though-super pale, dark circles under my eyes (glasses are a good cover) and now my hair is thinning all because I can't even eat right. I think regular people wouldn't notice but a doctor would see my poor diet and nutrition (not necessarily my mental state although they might be able to make the connection) I don't even drink, smoke or do drugs but yo-yo dieting and not being able to eat properly really takes it's toll. I know a bad diet also has a hand in depression but I can't seem to change it and I've given up caring. I don't even bother wearing make-up cos that just makes me look worse somehow and I've never been able to apply it properly.

 

[Sapphire]

No strangers and casual acquaintances don't know. I am good at hiding it. I put on a fake smile when I am with people. I have had more than one person tell me that they are glad to always see me smiling and "happy". People who are close to me know better.

 

[TessaMocha]

People can tell I'm having a bad day, but no clue the extent it goes to. I mask with a lot of smiles

 

[delusionalgirl]

The depression doesn't show until I'm extremely stressed. I can keep a mask on. Hell even if they found my methods, they wouldn't be surprised because I do have valid reasons for having a gun and ropes.

 

[The anhedonic one]

I'm that far gone now that it's impossible to hide my inner turmoil anymore.
Just take one look at me and you know that you are looking at a broken person.

 

[Aisley]

I have masks and masks. But mainly because I feel like people irl knowing things about me is a way they can have power over me. I wear masks with almost everyone.

 

[wristcutangel]

self harm scars are probably the most noticeable alongside that i border on incapable when it comes to socializing to point towards something being wrong.

 

[90starve]

i find that my depression, and such, is very easy to hide from coworkers and strangers - i don't have to wear my "happy face" for as long.

although, my boyfriend is very aware. he has been staying with me, and is unemployed so doesn't leave the house. this means that we don't get any space from each other, and the mask just slips too easily :/

 

[socio]

Not at all. Although it hurts me to think that others don't think I need help, it's probably for the best. No one could really tell unless I tell them upfront - but even then, they either wouldn't believe it, or start asking why I would even be depressed. I also tend to laugh at anything, even though 80% of it is fake. (others seem to believe it though.) It's easy to laugh off anything.

Yeah, I self harm. But I can hide it. Deep wounds would be covered in bandages and light scars can be easily excused as something else. No one really knows that I self harm though. I tend to wear long-sleeved jumpers/shirts, and never wear short trousers.

 

[ShuttingDown]

Nah nobody thinks I am depressed or suicidal, I am so chill faced minding my own self even a top psychologist might find it hard to read mind or face, collegues or family when I am drunk or high on benzos still have no clue (maybe I am drinking not enough )

 

[UKscotty]

I try my best to hide it so probably not.

People don't actually care anyway so no one is looking too hard.

By hiding it I am doing all I can to not be a burden. Once someone realises you are depressed or suicidal, you are a major burden and a hassle they will try their best to avoid.

 

[enough of this]

I've learned to hide my suicidality. I know what not to say to anyone. I act as though I'm fine. When people start getting suspicious, there's always someone who has to be a hero and is compelled to rescue me. So, to avoid all those complications, I just act "normal."

 

[todiefor]

Since I've been wanting to ctb, I haven't really left the house it's been months. If I go to the grocery store etc among strangers it's ok, but I think I definitely cannot keep it together in front of friends so I have totally cut myself off. I'm too scared to see any professional either as I don't think I can keep it together and they might send me somewhere. I'm just generally terrified that someone who cares might know and take away my options to ctb.

Prior to this I wasn't really depressed, I think if I were having a bad day I don't think I show it much, although my base line was never bubbly or too happy so it isn't all that hard I not show it I guess.

 

[Stormy Raine]

My co-workers see me as so nice, funny, and even happy to be around. I fake it everyday, if they truly knew I hate it here and think of ctbing everyday they would never believe it!

 

[suicidalloser]

not even in the slightest otherwise
yes

 

[sensenmann]

I know almost everybody I interact with can feel something is off about me.

 

[HighFlight]

I fake it everyday

Yup - EVERYDAY!! I've reached a point in my life that I try to be more open, but nobody I talk to really believes it's anything more than some mild depression brought on by a bad day. If I told them I was thinking about ctb, it would be dismissed.

It all goes along with my double lives. Before, my good side didn't want anyone to know, so I buried my feelings and shared them with no one. I was the person people came to when they had problems. And my bad side is too shallow to have any feelings, and would never care what others would think.

My life is a slow-motion train wreck, and nobody sees it coming.

 

[Stormy Raine]

I tried being honest about how I felt to what I thought were friends and family and it ended me 4 days in the psych hospital. So now I keep my mouth shut and I've blocked those people out my life! I'm forced to live a double life, long as you smile and pretend to be happy people are so easily fooled, but when you're honest, you're labeled crazy? I just come here and vent and listen to others and go back in my hole, now everyone thinks I'm happy and they "fixed" me lol

 

[liljeep]

Yeah... I have limited range of (perceivable) emotions if you talk to me IRL, am monotone and very quiet, etc. Rarely, I act 'normal', but I don't speak unless spoken to unless it's absolutely necessary. At college, I tried to be more friendly and open. But I shut down very easily. I've been told I seem very stressed or lonely.